


you heard that i was trouble, but you couldn't resist

by taessmile (prettyboykieren), writing_secrets



Category: SHINee, 방탄소년단 | Bangtan Boys | BTS
Genre: Abuse, Alternate Universe - Modern Setting, Anxiety, Depression, Drinking, Fluff and Angst, Friends With Benefits, Hurt/Comfort, Implied/Referenced Self-Harm, M/M, Mental Health Issues, Poor Life Choices, Post-Traumatic Stress Disorder - PTSD, Recreational Drug Use, Slow Burn, Suicide Attempt, Violence, alternative methods of self harm, fuck buddies, petty crime
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-03-16
Updated: 2017-10-30
Packaged: 2018-10-06 05:52:26
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence
Chapters: 15
Words: 56,457
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/10327193
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/prettyboykieren/pseuds/taessmile, https://archiveofourown.org/users/writing_secrets/pseuds/writing_secrets
Summary: tomorrow becomes today, today becomes yesterday, tomorrow becomes yesterday and is behind me, life isn’t about living along but living throughor alternativelyThe great lie that is adulthood is thinking that someone knows what they’re doing. No one knows. Everyone is screaming. The room is on fire. Life is hard.





	1. me and the rest of my heathens

**Author's Note:**

> welcome to another wild ride with yours truly B and K

Taemin is a good kid. He goes to church, volunteers, gets good grades, everything that other people tell him is the good thing to do. Of course, he also does a lot of bad things. Like swiping the pack of cigarettes like he does nearly every Wednesday. Last time he had been in confession the priest had told him to say five Hail Mary’s, promise to beg for forgiveness, and to change his behavior. He had completed two of the three things which was better than nothing. He leaves the store after buying an energy drink for Yoongi, the cigarettes tucked safely in his pocket. There’s no incident, like always, and Taemin heads towards the loft where he knows he’ll be able to find some if not most of the other boys. He has to duck the minute he opens the door in order to dodge something that had been launched at his head. Taemin glares over at the source, Jimin, before shutting the door behind him.

“It was an accident I swear,” Jimin says.

“Sure it was,” Taemin says.

He tosses the energy drink to Yoongi before sitting beside the grumpy looking elder.

“Have any of you seen Jinki today?” Taemin asks.

“Aren’t you the one who always has tabs on him, lover boy?” Kibum asks. 

Taemin sticks out his tongue and pulls the cigarette pack from his pocket. He lights one with a lighter swiped from Jonghyun.

“I don’t have tabs on him all the time,” Taemin pouts. 

“Sure you don’t,” Jonghyun says, grabbing his lighter from Taemin’s hands. 

“So we  _ are  _ having that party, right?” Taemin asks.

“Sure. One last hoorah before you brats are back in school where you can’t bother me at all hours of the day,” Jonghyun says.

“You coming Jiminnie?” Taemin asks.

“Can I bring friends?” Jimin asks.

 

Taehyung lets himself into Jimin’s apartment wrinkling his nose at Jeongguk who looks him up and down with something akin to disappointment in his eyes. “What?” He snaps.

“You’re not wearing that to the party right?”

“Why?” 

Jimin squawks as he enters the room, “Because that is not party wear.” 

Taehyung looks down at his sweater and frowns. “He said casual. This is casual.” 

Jimin tuts, “Oh sweetie, no. What Taemin means by casual is ‘don’t break out the body glitter’ not sweaters.” 

“I have a spare pair of leather pants he can borrow, let me grab them,” Jeongguk says walking into his room and shuffling around as Taehyung looks at his stripey sweater of choice. 

“I don’t understand. Casual is like… pajamas.” 

Jeongguk groans in disgust from the other room.

“Oh no no no. That’s theatre kid casual. what he meant was this,” Jimin spun around to show off his lucky red pants that Taehyung knows are his favorite because they make his ass look great. Seokjin said so when he was half asleep so they knew it was true. “Dance kid casual. No body glitter.” 

Taehyung pouts, “Well how was I supposed to know that?” 

Jeongguk tosses him the leather pants and a black t-shirt. “Put these on and then Jimin can help you with make up.” 

Taehyung grumbles as he changes into the clothes, “No body glitter. No sweaters. What sort of party is this?” 

Jimin just laughs and pats his back, “These pants make your ass look fantastic. Are you sure these are yours Jeonggukie?” 

“They don’t fit me anymore but looks like they fit Taehyungie perfectly.” Jeongguk smiles as Jimin starts patting on a BB cream onto Taehyung’s face. 

Taehyung rolls his eyes, “Just answer me one thing. Will there be booze?” 

“Of course.” Jimin sounds offended by the question. 

“That’s all I need,” he mutters, closing his eyes so Jimin can work his magic with makeup. 

“Say Taehyung how’d you convince your dad to let you out?” 

“I played the puppy dog eyes and guilted him about how mom would have let me go out.” Taehyung says softly, “I also covered my ass saying that I was staying with you guys.” 

“Are you sure you wanna go out?” Jimin asks gently, “We can just stay in if you’d prefer?” 

“No. No it’s okay. I really need this.” He promises. “I just need to go out, have a little fun and come back and sleep.” 

Jimin nods. “Alright then we’d better get going.” 

 

Taemin is leaning against the brick wall of the entrance to the party. He seems to be engaged in some conversation with a couple of older men but when he spots them he pushes off the wall and comes towards them, casually flicking the cigarette to the side.

“Jiminnie! You guys made it!” Taemin beams, throwing his arms around Jimin.

“I thought you said this wasn’t going to be one of  _ those _ parties,” Jimin says.

Taemin gives him a wide eyed, innocent look that’s gotten him out of all sorts of trouble. “Jimin, come on. It’ll be fun.”

As Jimin talks with Taemin, Taehyung makes his way inside - intent on acquainting himself with the bar. Regardless of what Jimin says, he has actually drank a few times before. Not frequently and never with the intention of getting drunk but there’s a first time for everything. He’s never taken shots before and he doesn’t plan on starting without Jimin’s guidance so he grabs a simple beer from the cooler and makes his way deeper into the crowd of people. There’s a chorus of hoots and wolf whistles and Taehyung finds himself watching some guy with pink hair lick his way up another man’s bare chest, pausing to bite a lime from his partner’s mouth. The man grins and turns. Taehyung stiffens. His brother had dyed his hair since the funeral but Seokjin looks the same as always, put together even at the strangest of times. 

Seokjin’s boy toy pulls him closer, murmuring into his ear and Taehyung bites back his disgust, moving further into the crowd. Seeing his older brother, poised and perfect as always, when he feels like everything is going to shit makes him ache. He shakes his head, downing the beer much faster than he would have normally to drown out his own thoughts. As he finishes it Taemin pulls him into a group of older men (plus Jimin) for a round of shots and Taehyung loses himself in the burn of it all. 

It isn’t long before Taehyung is well and truly drunk. He’s dancing with someone; he doesn’t know their name and doesn’t care to. The only thing he really cares about it how they grip his hips too tight and the way they’re leading him towards door. He struggles briefly until they snap something in his ear and their fingernails bite into the skin of his hip where his shirt has ridden up. 

“We’re just gonna go somewhere quiet.”

“No no no. I need Jimin. Just let me find Jimin.” Taehyung mumbles, trying to pull away once more as fear swirls in his gut. 

“C’mon baby, don’t you wanna go somewhere quiet? I’ll treat you so good,” they’re practically purring in his ear, breath ghosting over his cheek and Taehyung flinches. 

“Please no, I just wanna find Jimin. Just let me go,” Taehyung slurs. 

Something dark flashes over the stranger’s face and Taehyung feels like he’s made a terrible mistake. 

“Let him go,” A firm voice cuts over the stranger before they can say anything else. “He clearly doesn’t want to leave with you and I don’t think you want to have a problem with me.” 

The stranger shakes their head and lets go of Taehyung instantly, moving towards to door with a huff. Relief surges through Taehyung and he smiles thankfully at the newcomer. 

“My name is Minho. Are you okay?” 

Taehyung nods, unable to find his voice. 

“I’m a friend of Taemin’s.”

Taehyung nods again, “My name’s Taehyung,” he pauses, “Do you know where Taemin or Jimin is?” He asks absently, searching to crowd. He turns to face Minho and whatever he was planning on saying dies on his lips. 

Minho raises a curious brow and Taehyung nearly chokes. Now, Taehyung can admit when he’s seen a fine piece of ass and Minho fits the bill. Tall with a leather jacket draped over broad shoulders and a cigarette between his lips; Minho looks like trouble in the best possible way. 

“You sure you’re okay?” 

“Yeah. Sorry, you’re just really…” His drunk mind searches for a fitting adjective, “Hot.” he finishes lamely and Minho laughs. 

“I think we ought to get you some water. C’mon, I thought I saw Jimin this way.” 

Minho offers Taehyung his hand and the younger takes it, allowing himself to be lead through the crowd. 

He leads Taehyung up a set of stairs into a loft area above the crowded main floor of the warehouse. It’s much quieter up here and Taehyung hums contently. There’s several mismatched couches and coffee tables and a hallway leading towards what Taehyung thinks is a kitchen area and a few private rooms. The couches are full of people, including a passed out Jeongguk and a very stoned Jimin and Taemin. 

“Is it just me or does that look like Taehyung?” Jimin asks.

“I think it is Taehyung. And that’s definitely Minho,” Taemin says.

“But what is Minho doing with Taehyung?”

Minho rolls his eyes, “Saving him from creeps while his friends are higher than kites.” 

“Hey! That’s not our fault!” Taemin says.

“Yeah, Jeongguk was supposed to watch him,” Jimin says. 

“Jeonggukkie is passed out next to you,” Taehyung grumbles, taking the water bottle that Minho offers him. 

“Well shit,” Jimin says.

Taehyung downs the water and allows Minho to lead him to a couch where he watches as Taemin and Jimin squabble over who should have been watching him before they both dissolve into giggles. 

Minho snorts and settles down on the couch next to Taehyung, humming along with the music. Nodding along Taehyung takes in the various people sprawled throughout the loft. There’s a couple making out obscenely in an armchair. 

“Are they gonna fuck?” Taehyung asks, staring at the couple.

The purple haired one half turns to glance at him, “Excellent idea.”

He rips the shirt of the silver haired boy so it’s wide open, showing off the man’s abs.

“Absolutely not,” a brunet man says as he appears at the top of the stairs, smacking him in the head with a newspaper.

“We were just kidding,” the silver haired man says, pouting up at the brunet. 

He gets smacked in the head as well. “I come home to find you guys throwing a party in my loft,” he grumbles.

“Jinki!” Taemin says as he takes notice of the man who had just come up the stairs. 

He scrambles to get off the couch before running over and throwing his arms around him. Jinki lifts Taemin and spins him in a circle that ends with a light kiss on Taemin’s nose.

“Did you miss me?” Jinki says.

“Of course I did,” Taemin laughs. 

“Do you guys have to do that every time?” Minho asks. 

“Ayy don’t be jealous just because you need to get laid,” Jimin grins. 

Taemin is whispering something to Jinki that has him laughing silently. They cuddle together as Taemin leads them over to the couch and they sit down with Taemin mostly straddling Jinki. They’re just talking to themselves and laughing quietly, ignoring everyone else in the room. 

A blonde haired man stumbles up the stairs with another man attached firmly to his side. They pause at the top of the stairs, the taller of the two pinning the blonde to the wall. The blonde smirks and pulls him down for a searing kiss. 

Taehyung grimaces, looking to Minho for answers. “Who are they?” 

“Blondie is Yoongi, our adorably grumpy rapper.” Yoongi flips Minho off. “Brunette is Hoseok, aka the literal personification of the sun, also a rapper.” 

Hoseok pulls away to beam at Minho and yeah, Taehyung gets what Minho means. Taehyung nods and Yoongi tugs Hoseok down the hall, barely sparing the group a glance. 

Taehyung watches with a mixture of concern and curiosity and Minho laughs, “They’re fuck-buddies. Hoseok is a hopeless romantic but he’s horny as hell.” 

“And Yoongi is just thirsty,” Taemin chimes in. 

Jimin perks up, “Yoongi is just in denial. He and Jeonggukkie have been dancing around each other for months. It’s probably for the best that he’s not awake right now.” 

Taehyung laughs, “Probably. Remember that time that he thought you and I were dating and he had a crush on you? I thought he was gonna kill me.”

“Sounds like him,” Jonghyun comments when he comes up for air.

Taemin whispers yet another thing in Jinki’s ear that has him grinning and standing. 

“Don’t break my loft,” Jinki says as he pulls Taemin behind him towards the bedrooms.

Taehyung makes a face, curling up on the couch with his head in Minho lap. Minho startles at the sudden contact and Jimin laughs. 

“He’s a cuddly drunk. Actually,” Jimin drawls, “He’s just cuddly.” 

Jeongguk groans softly, stretching as he wakes. He blearily takes in the scene and smiles, “He likes when you play with his hair.” 

Minho flounders, “W-what?” 

Taehyung just hums, closing his eyes. 

Jeongguk makes eye contact with Minho and smirks, “Pull his hair.” 

Taehyung’s eyes fly open and his face turns scarlet. “Gukkie,” he whines. 

Jimin starts laughing so hard he falls off the couch and smacks Jeongguk’s thigh repeatedly. 

Key perks up, cooing. “Things just got interesting,” he trills. Taehyung sits up, hiding in his hands and whining more. 

“Hey Minho, maybe you should make sure the party clears up,” Jonghyun says. 

“Aw c’mon baby. Don’t spoil his fun. Maybe Minho  _ wants _ to pull Taehyung’s hair.” Key purrs. 

Minho chokes, cheeks turning red. 

“Maybe later,” Jonghyun murmurs, patting Taehyung’s back as he leads Key down the stairs. “Make sure everything is cleaned up,” he calls over his shoulder. 

Minho grumbles as they leave and Jimin curls back up on the couch, nuzzling into Jeongguk’s side and mumbling something about sleep. Taehyung stares at them blankly, wondering how the hell he was going to get home. 

Sighing, Minho walks down the stairs and into the crowd of people, making his way to the DJ booth. Without really thinking about it Taehyung follows, weaving through the drunk party goers (not that he was much better) and humming along to whatever song was playing. 

Minho picks up the microphone, cutting the music off. “You all have five minutes to get out, then I call the police.” Minho says.

People scatter in a panic, dumping whatever they’re holding and running for the door. Within minutes, the building is clear. Taehyung starts gathering red solo cups and throwing them in trash bins without being prompted or asked. The silence is nice, soothing after the hours of booming bass and people shouting. The whole warehouse smells like liquor and weed and the faint smell of sweat and Taehyung hopes that Jinki has air freshener lying around somewhere, if only to get rid of the body odor smell. Minho puts on something quiet on the speakers and Taehyung sings along to the familiar tune. Minho loses track of how much time passes as he listens to Taehyung sing. 

“Aw, you guys are bonding. That’s cute,” Taemin’s voice says.

Minho looks over to where a rumpled Taemin is making his way to the bar. His hair is sticking up in strange places and it isn’t all that hard to fill in what he had been doing with Jinki.

“Nice hair,” Minho says.

“You like that? These are better,” Taemin says, ripping open his shirt to reveal his chest littered with hickeys. 

Taehyung glances over and promptly looks away, a blush darkening his cheeks as he puts two and two together. Taemin has a shit eating grin as he looks over at Taehyung.

“That’s so cute, you’re shy,” Taemin says.

He just shrugs, “I guess.” 

“Is he making you help him clean up?” Taemin asks, changing the subject. 

Frowning Taehyung shakes his head, “...No? I just wanted to help.” 

Taemin coos at him and pats his cheek. Taehyung pulls away, looking slightly uncomfortable with the close contact. 

“You and Minho both like to keep things clean, you’re a match made in heaven,” Taemin says.

Minho rolls his eyes, “Suuure. And you and Jimin are- Nevermind.” 

Taehyung quirks his brow curiously but shrugs it off, continuing to pick up scattered drinks. Taemin shakes his head, “You’ve got it mostly picked up. Leave it for the morning.” 

“You sure?” 

Minho nods, “Yeah. Thing one and thing two upstairs will help finish up tomorrow.” 

“Find a place to sleep and we’ll see you in the morning,” Taemin wiggles his fingers as he walks back up the stairs, leaving the two alone once more. 

 

Jeongguk’s phone buzzes and he looks at the screen, eyes widening before he throws the phone down on his bed and scrambles down the stairs. He bursts through Jimin’s door, with a squawk. 

“Hyung, holy fuck! Have you checked your messages?” 

Jimin looks up from his laptop, “No?” 

“You should. Because - and you’ll never believe it - we got invited to go laser tagging!” Jeongguk trips over his words in his excitement. 

Jimin squawks in return, “Holy shit!” 

“Wait. Taehyung’s in this group chat too.” 

“What?” 

 

The horn blares and Seokjin bats Kibum’s hand away from the horn. “They’re at the curb already, dammit.” 

“Like I care,” Kibum says, leaning back in the seat.

Jimin, Taehyung, and Jeongguk all climb into the back of the truck all exchanging their hellos with Taemin. Jonghyun waves from inside the cab, looking for all the world like an excited puppy. 

“Are you guys excited?” Taemin asks, knocking on the dividing window to let Jin and Jinki know they were all settled. 

Jeongguk and Jimin speak almost too fast to be heard as they say “Yes.”

Raising a brow at his friend’s eager responses, Taehyung nods, “Of course.” 

The drive to the loft is quick, and Key hops out of the truck to get the remaining members. Key stomps upstairs and bangs on the closed doors.

“Ya! Choi!”

Minho opens his door with a scowl, “Don’t call me Choi. It makes me feel like I’m eighty years old.” 

“Ass in truck,  _ Choi _ . Now,” 

Minho shoots him a withering look as he pulls on boots and grabs his bag. It clanks when he puts it over his shoulder. 

“Hobi! Yoongi! Stop fucking and get your horny asses in the truck.” Key snaps.

Yoongi stumbles out, hair mussed and eyes puffy with sleep. “Why do you always assume we’re fucking?” He grumbles, shoving his feet into shoes and slinging on his paint stained leather jacket. 

“Because nine times out of ten you are.”

“Because you and Jonghyun are much better,” Yoongi smirks, slapping Kibum’s ass. 

Not awake enough for verbal communication, Hoseok blinks at Kibum and walks past the two and out the door. Key flips off Yoongi and follows Hoseok out the door. Yoongi hums to himself as he locks up, making sure his keys are in his pocket as he hops into the back of the truck. 

Taehyung waves eagerly as Yoongi settles next to Taemin, pulling the attention to himself as Jeongguk holds in a pout. Taemin grins as he leans into Yoongi and the older throws an arm around his shoulders. Face lighting up, Taehyung inches closer. 

“Are we cuddling?” he asks and Taemin thinks that if Taehyung had a tail it’d be wagging wildly right now. 

“Yeah, sure. Come here,” Taemin says. 

Taehyung grins and leans onto Yoongi’s shoulder, pulling away at the face he receives. Giggling, Jimin lays down across Taemin’s lap and pulls Jeongguk to lay on his. Taehyung licks his lips before laying down in Minho’s lap with a small smirk. Minho looks up, before cautiously draping his arm over Taehyung’s torso. Jeongguk grins knowingly, somewhere between Jimin’s lap and Yoongi’s. 

“Do you remember what I said about playing with his hair hyung?” 

“Gukkie!” Taehyung moans, hiding his face as Minho just shrugs as cards his fingers through Taehyung’s hair. His shoulders tuck up towards his ears in surprise before he relaxes into Minho’s touch. 

Taemin grins at them before leaning up and whispering something into Yoongi’s ear, close enough that his mouth brushes and Yoongi laughs. Jeongguk frowns, plopping his head into Yoongi’s lap with a little more force than strictly necessary. 

“Ow, Gukkie what the hell?” Yoongi grimaces, hands automatically making their way to the younger’s hair. 

“Sorry,” Jeongguk mumbles petulantly, hiding his face while Jimin laughs into Taemin’s lap. 

The car rolls to a stop, tragically too soon for Jeongguk. They all hop out of the back and Minho grabs his bag. Taemin slings his arm over Yoongi’s shoulders and the older slips an arm around his waist. Jeongguk grinds his teeth as he does the same with Jimin. 

Taehyung skips after Jonghyun watching as he uncaps a bottle of red spray paint and sets to work of spelling out ‘fuck’ in large letters. “Working something out hyung?” he asks. 

“Something like that,” Jonghyun mutters.

Taehyung nods his approval as Kibum pulls out his own spray paint and adds decorative touches around Jonghyun’s ‘fuck’. “Look babe, it’s your last fuck to give.” 

“Yeah. There it goes.” 

“Aww, babe I know you’re upset about having to teach again,” Key says, winding his arms around Jonghyun’s neck and pulling him in for a kiss. 

Looking down at his feet Taehyung makes his way over to Taemin and Yoongi, who are sharing a blunt even as Yoongi continues to paint. That’s probably some form of fire hazard. “Wow, hyung that looks so cool!” 

Yoongi grunts, barely looking away from his art piece as Taemin tosses him a new can. “This color, towards the top.”

Taehyung hums his approval, “It’d be really cool if you used some of this dark purple towards the bottom,” he says, pointing out the can to Taemin. 

“You have a good eye,” Yoongi mutters. 

Taemin’s brow shoots up and Taehyung beams, walking over to Minho and pursing his lips at the almost furious concentration. “You look like you’re going to shit a brick hyung. Maybe relax a little bit?” 

Key’s cackling laughter mixes with Taemin’s laughter.

“That’s the best thing I’ve ever heard!” Taemin says.

“He’s my new favorite, holy shit, Minho he’s totally right,” Key says. 

Taehyung pouts, “I didn’t mean to be rude. I’m sorry.” 

Minho shrugs it off, “If you hadn’t said it, Key would have eventually.” He hands Taehyung the can of spray paint he had been holding absently as he lights his own joint and Taehyung smiles mischievously. 

He finds himself an empty patch of wall and gets to work, painting absently as he hums to himself.  

“Should we let the other two paint?” Jin asks, looking over at Jinki.

Jinki shrugs. “I don’t see why not.”

Jin peeks over his shoulder at Taehyung’s art, frowning at the apparent ease the younger is handling the spray paint. Jimin bounds over to his friend, oohing and ahing. 

“It looks so good Taetae!” 

Taehyung just smiles, grabbing a new color and adding depth to his painting, ignoring the way the paint fumes are growing stronger with so many painting in such a small space. When he backs away from the art with a satisfied nod, Jonghyun presses a new can of paint into his hand. 

“You should sign it.  _ Not _ with your real name of course.” 

Obediently, Taehyung nods and signs a simple ‘V’ in red paint. Jonghyun ruffles his hair and Seokjin meanders closer to look at his younger brother’s art. 

“This is really good, Taehyungie,” Seokjin says, “Are you in art school?” 

Taehyung bites back a scowl, “No. Dad won’t let me. He’s determined to make me into a businessman. But you’d know that if you talked to me.” 

Seokjin purses his lips, “We’re talking now.” 

Namjoon slides over, wrapping an arm around Seokjin’s waist. “We should probably get going. You know before the cops show up.” 

“Good plan,” Minho says, collecting the cans and dumping them back into his bag.

Taehyung nods, brushing past Seokjin as he climbs into the back of the truck. Jimin pulls Taehyung into his lap, almost disappearing behind Taehyung as he squeezes the younger comfortingly. Taemin sprawls out in the back and Yoongi shoves him roughly with his feet to give himself space. Jeongguk senses his chance and starts to climb into the truck, but before he can Taemin spills into Yoongi’s lap with a silly grin up at the older. Jeongguk purses his lips and is about to settle for next to Yoongi when Hoseok vaults into the truck and sits down, throwing an arm over Yoongi. Jeongguk crawls into Jimin’s lap to pout and Taehyung slides out of the way, closer to where Minho is spread out in the corner. 

Taehyung looks at the disproportional space Minho is taking up and frowns. “Unless you want me to sit between your legs, maybe consider giving me some more room.”

Minho arches a brow and smiles lewdly at him, too high to care, “Be my guest.” 

Shrugging, Taehyung crawls into Minho’s lap, pulling up his hood and leaning his head back against the older man’s shoulder. Jimin smirks at Taehyung knowingly and Taehyung sticks his tongue out. Minho’s arms settle around his waist and Taehyung sighs deeply. 

Jin slams on the brakes and Minho braces against the cab against the sudden stop, only realizing after the fact that his arm is tight around Taehyung’s waist. Taehyung is stiff in his arms, a blush spreading across his cheeks. It’s at that moment that Minho realizes that in order to grab the younger by the waist he had most definitely at least brushed the younger’s crotch. Taemin is snickering as he readjusts himself to be comfortably sprawled in both Yoongi and Hoseok’s laps. 

“Nice one,” Taemin says.  

Jeongguk is tense as he watches them and he bats at Jimin to get his attention. 

“Do you think they’ve had a threesome?” Jeongguk hisses through his teeth to Jimin, eyes focused on the three.

“What? I don’t-” Jimin breaks off as he watches Hoseok stroke Taemin’s stomach, tracing patterns onto the exposed skin. They both look too comfortable for it to be the first time they’ve done that.  “Oh my god you’re right.”

The first stop is the loft, where Hoseok and Yoongi hop out of the bed of the truck easily, followed a little more slowly by Minho. Taemin sprawls out again as they drive to the university to drop off the students.

“Goodnight,” Taemin says cheerily as they climb out. 


	2. out of sight, out of mind

Jonghyun runs his hands through his white blonde hair as he enters the classroom. He dumps the files and his bag on the table, already knowing he was ten minutes late, before searching for chalk to write on the chalkboard. If he wasn’t hungover, it probably wouldn’t have been so bad to teach a nine am class. But considering as how he was, things were going very very bad for him this morning. He blames Key and his nice wine. 

“Hello, I’m Professor Kim Jonghyun. This is psychology 2000 so if you’re not here for that there’s probably a different class you should be in,” Jonghyun says, turning to face the class. 

It’s a fairly large class, but it doesn’t take him long to spot the three terribly familiar faces in the rows of the students. He sighs as they wave at them.

“This class will focus on the psychology of criminal conduct. Yes this is just one of the classes that you guys take to get your degree. No I’m not just going to automatically pass you. This class will require effort, and by that I mean there will be four small papers and one big final paper because it counts as your writing class. My office hours are whenever one of you sends me an email because I’m not going to sit in that broom closet they dare call an office,” Jonghyun says. 

He turns to the board and begins the lecture. 

 

Jonghyun leans back in the chair and spins a pen between his fingers idly. The majority of the students just head out of the classroom without a care. Some of the more ambitious students come and greet him, including one overly ambitious girl that seems to want to deconstruct the entire lecture. Jonghyun smiles politely and nods along as she talks and is all too grateful when Jimin butts his way into the conversation. The girl smiles awkwardly and leaves the room as Jimin leaves no room for her to talk. 

“Hey brats,” Jonghyun greets.

Hurt flashes across Taehyung’s face before he can cover it up. 

“Not you, you’re the good kid. I’m talking about the other two who dragged you into this mess. What’s going on?”

Taehyung smiles at Jonghyun briefly, nudging Jimin and Jeongguk with a smirk. 

“Why didn’t you tell us you were a teacher here?” Jeongguk asks, incredulous that Jonghyun had hidden it from him. 

“Professor. And why would I tell you?” Jonghyun asks. 

“Because we go here and friends talk about things like work to each other.” 

“Yeah! Taetae tells horror stories from the night shift at Denny’s all the time!” Jimin chimes in.

“Taehyung is the responsible one that works. You two are freeloaders that Taemin introduced us to.” Jonghyun says. 

Taehyung bites back a laugh at Jeongguk’s gasp and Jimin’s simple shrug. 

“The point still stands hyung. Why don’t you ever talk about work?” Jimin points out.

Taehyung offers him a way out, “Do you just talk about it with the rest of the hyungs?” 

“I didn’t talk about work because I was still hanging onto the delusion that you would never find me here. It’s a big university, but apparently not big enough.”

“It’s a gen ed hyung.” Jeongguk says, “We gotta take it sometime. It was bound to happen.” 

Jonghyun groans and puts his head on his desk. “Whatever. Don’t you have other classes? Or aspirin?” 

Taehyung pouts at Jonghyun’s tone, but he shuffles through his bag regardless. The bottle of pills rattles in his hand as he offers it to Jonghyun. “Perks of being best friends with two frat boys is I’m always packing around pain meds for their hangovers.” 

Jonghyun accepts the medication, “You’re my favorite. It’s official.”

Taehyung beams at Jonghyun. Jimin pats Jeongguk’s back as he pouts, accustomed to being the unquestioned baby of the group. 

 

The phone blasts the annoying song his dumb friend had set and wouldn’t let him change. Taemin blindly searches for it while Jinki rolls over with a groan.

“Hello?” Taemin mumbles. 

“Taeminnie! Glad you’re up!” the cheerful voice on the line says.

“Moonkyu-ah. What time is it?” 

“Three in the morning.”

“Why are you calling at three in the morning?”

“Well there’s rumors they’re doing a room check.”

“Why is that my problem?”

“We need help hiding shit.”

“You’re kidding, right?”

“It’s your room too, at least until the end of this semester.”

“Fuck,” Taemin breathes. “I’ll be there in a couple minutes.”

Taemin hangs up the phone and stretches before sitting up. Jinki makes a noise of curiosity and reaches out to link hands with Taemin. 

“Hey babe, I have to go,” Taemin says.

“Wha’ time is it?” Jinki asks.

“Three am. My roommates are idiots.”

Taemin presses a kiss to the side of Jinki’s head and rolls out of bed. He blindly dresses in whatever clothes are nearest before grabbing his wallet, phone, and keys and heading out the door. 

 

Taemin is still only half awake when he opens the door to his apartment. Moonkyu bounces up to him cheerily. 

“How are you so awake?” Taemin asks him.

“I poured redbull into my coffee,” Moonkyu says.

“It’s been awful,” Wonshik says without bothering to look up from his book. 

There’s a lump of blankets on one of the beds that Taemin assumes is Jongin.

“So what exactly do we need to hide?” Taemin asks.

“Well, besides the weed, alcohol and I think we might have some ecstasy leftover from that one club we went to,” Moonkyu says. 

Taemin sighs heavily. “Is that floorboard under the bed still loose?”

 

Taehyung knows his dad doesn’t often get the chance to sit down to dinner with him. It comes with his job as a Senior Police Officer, where he often works strange hours. So when he get the news that his dad is going to be home for dinner he leaves his homework to skip into the kitchen. The meal he makes isn’t anything fancy but it’s better than take-out and it’s not ramen so he calls it a win. 

His dad enters the room with a loud bang. The door slamming behind him and his footsteps echoing through the house. Taehyung suppresses the anxiety that flares in his stomach. It’s fine. His dad just must be upset about something. 

“Dad? I uh. I made dinner.” 

There’s a beat of silence and then, “Give me a damn minute.”

Definitely angry about something then. Taehyung swallows nervously setting the table and pulling out his phone to keep himself occupied while he waits. When his father’s loud footsteps come closer he locks his phone and slides into into his pocket, looking up at the door. Seojun sits down without a word and starts digging into the meal. Tentatively, Taehyung follows his lead. The silence is awkward and he doesn’t know if he should break it. Luckily he doesn’t have to. 

“How’s school?” Seojun asks. “You better be doing well seeing as I’m paying for it.” 

Taehyung nods, “It’s okay. I’m doing well in all my classes.” 

His dad reads the unsaid and frowns. “But?” his tone is cold. 

Swallowing down the nerves Taehyung smiles weakly, “I just. Uh. I didn’t do so well on a quiz this week.” 

His stomach drops when his dad freezes. The knife he’d been using as a utensil suddenly seems much more threatening when it’s pointing at him from across the table. 

“Listen. I’m not paying your way through college for you to be a fuck up.” 

Taehyung flinches at the harsh words but nods along. “I’m sorry. I’ll do better.” 

“You better.” Seojun snaps. 

Dinner is finished in tense silence and then Seojun is leaving to catch a bit of sleep before his next shift.

Taehyung escapes to his room, feeling generally unsettled. His homework stares him down from his desk and he sighs, unlocking his phone and dialing Jimin’s number.

_ “What do you want?” _ Jimin’s tone is light, if not a bit stressed. 

Taehyung sighs, “Nothing really. It’s just kinda tense at home and could use a distraction.” 

_ “Tae… You know I would if I could. But I’m behind and I know you are too.” _

Pouting, he groans, “Don’t remind me.” 

_ “Sorry. But really. Do your shit and I’ll let you know when I’m done and then we can get blazed at the loft or something.”  _ Jimin offers and Taehyung can’t help but agree. 

He doesn’t want to do homework, but it does need to be done or else his father’s temper will strike again. They exchange quick goodbyes before Taehyung puts his head down on the desk and groans.

 

“So I dropped out of college,” Taemin says.

Jinki looks up at him with an unamused expression. “You what?”

“I dropped out. I’m almost done with the EMT course so I can work in an ambulance when I’m not with the dance company.”

“Since when have you been taking EMT courses?”

“Since seven months ago when Jongin sprained his ankle.”

“You dropped out of college on a whim?”

“Yeah? So are you gonna come to the graduation ceremony?”

“I suppose.”

Taemin drapes himself in Jinki’s lap, pushing the book out of his way. “Somehow that wasn’t the reaction that I wanted.”

“I’m trying to work Taemin.”

“You’ve been working all day I need attention.”

“Can I give you attention and still read?”

“I  _ suppose _ .”

Taemin shifts so he can rest his head in the crook of Jinki’s neck and Jinki idly traces patterns on Taemin’s back as he reads. Taemin lets him read a few more pages before pressing light kisses to the side of Jinki’s neck. Jinki ignores him, so he shifts to suck on his neck instead, intent on leaving a hickey.

“You are insufferable,” Jinki groans as he tosses the book to the side.

 

Jonghyun is definitely certain that at least half of the kids in his class didn’t take his warning seriously. The other half were passable, but so far as he shifts through the stacks of papers they had turned in, he isn’t seeing much hope. He groans in defeat as he realizes that he isn’t even halfway done with grading the essays.

“Remind me again why I’m teaching?” Jonghyun asks.

“Because you’re too sensitive to be a therapist,” Kibum says, pouring himself another glass of wine. “Do you want another?”

“I shouldn’t be drunk when I’m grading papers.”

“It might make it more fun.”

“I shouldn’t.”

“Look at you, being responsible,” Kibum says, pausing to give him a kiss before settling on the couch next to him.

Jonghyun flicks through Jimin’s essay, glad that he had at least had the sense to turn in an acceptable one. He wonders what the other two had done. If theirs turned out horrible, he would probably force them to stay in on Halloween just to punish them. He wasn’t trying to be a mean hyung, he just wanted to make sure they passed the semester. 

 

“Guys, I wanna go to a haunted house,” Jeongguk whines as he drops his bag by the door and kicks off his shit. 

Hoseok yelps, “No!” as he vaults over the couch to clap a hand over the younger’s mouth. “How dare you speak this blasphemy in my presence?” 

A door in the back slams open and Taemin comes into the room with a giant grin on his face. “Did I hear the words haunted and house?”

“How the fuck did you hear that from all the way back there?” Hoseok hisses. 

Taemin shrugs. “Let’s go, get everyone together.”

He turns back to head to the back rooms to rouse anyone in them.

“Hey wake up Taehyung,” Jeongguk says before scurrying back to Taemin.

Raising a brow, Hoseok ducks into Taehyung’s claimed room. Distantly Jeongguk can hear Hoseok trilling and cooing. There’s a beat of silence before garbled swearing and the sharp crack of someone getting slapped echoes through the loft. 

“What did you do?” Taemin asks, pinning Jeongguk with a glare.

“Saved myself. I have no regrets,” Jeongguk says.

Hoseok screams again and there’s a deep raspy shout of “Fuck off,” before Hoseok flees the room. 

“Fuck you Jeongguk. That’s a fucking death penalty,” Hoseok grouses, shoving Jeongguk into the wall playfully. 

“Oh! Well I’ll wake him up if one of you goes and wakes up Jinki,” Taemin smiles.

Hoseok smiles, “Sure,” he loops arms with Jeongguk, who narrows his eyes at Taemin suspiciously. 

Taemin shrugs and makes his way to Taehyung’s room. Inside Taehyung’s room the light has been turned on and the boy is a lump under the covers, completely hidden except for the barest hint of his recently dyed red hair. 

“Taehyung,” Taemin sings. “Time to get up.”

“I don’t have class. It’s not time to wake up,” Taehyung grumbles, burrowing somehow deeper under the covers.

Taemin flops himself on the bed beside him and pokes at his head. “Oh come on, we’re gonna go do something fun.”

Taehyung just makes a sound between a whine and a groan, rolling away. “Hyung please go away.” 

“My heart is breaking.” Taemin says, ruffling his hair. “I’ll buy you dinner.”

“I don’t want dinner, I wanna sleep.” Taehyung peeks out from his covers, squinting. His face is puffy with sleep and hair is a ruffled mess. 

“Not even if the dinner is meat?”

Humming in thought, he pouts. “Coffee?” 

“We’ll stop on the way.”

Taehyung sighs heavily as he throws the covers off of him, “Fine.” He drapes himself over Taemin’s shoulders, “Support me?” His voice is still sticky with sleep and he’s having a hard time keeping his eyes open but he’s up and willing to move and Taemin counts that as victory. Taemin waddles them out of the door where they come across Jeongguk and Hoseok bodily carrying Jinki down the hall. Taemin can’t help but snicker. 

“What? He’s out of bed!” Jeongguk says.

“The fuck am I in the hallway for?” Jinki says sleepily, awkwardly swinging his arms around in Jeongguk’s grasp.

“Stop moving,” Jeongguk hisses, trying his best to not drop his hyung. 

Taemin laughs. “Hey baby.”

Jinki thrashes in their grasp, managing to kick Hobi and slap Jeongguk before he gets his feet under him. “Taemin!” he says, throwing his arms over Taemin and Taehyung to bring them into a hug. He nuzzles his face into Taemin’s neck and then Taemin is supporting two people as they hang off of him. 

“Coffee?” Taehyung asks.

“Excellent idea,” Jinki says.

Taemin smiles as he passes Taehyung to Jeongguk. “As punishment for failing you get to carry him down the stairs.”

Taehyung makes a content noise when Jeongguk rolls his eyes and hikes him up onto his back, “Gukkie,” he mumbles and the younger laughs. 

“Go back to sleep, hyung.” He says as he walks down the stairs after Taemin and Jinki, Hoseok trailing behind, keeping a careful eye on Taehyung in case he started slipping. 

Luckily, a sleepy Taehyung is a cuddle demon, so he clings to Jeongguk hiding his face in the younger’s neck. Taemin turns back to grin widely at Jeongguk as he notices Minho in the bed of the truck.

“Hey hyung, help Jeongguk get Taehyung into the back,” Taemin says.

“Yeah of course,” Minho says, standing to help pull Taehyung into the truck.

Taehyung loops his arms around Minho’s neck as he lifts, grumbling at the change but not reacting when Minho grabs under his thighs so Jeongguk could duck out of the lift. 

When Minho goes to set Taehyung down he clings tighter, wrapping his legs around Minho’s waist and mumbling, “No. Cuddles.” 

Jeongguk laughs at Minho’s panicked expression as he climbs into the truck with the rest and settling down next to Taemin. Jinki settles an arm around Taemin’s shoulders and Taemin relaxes into him. Minho slowly relaxes, hands fluttering around to find a safe place to rest before settling cautiously on Taehyung’s waist. 

“Oh right! We need to stop for coffee!” Taemin says, wiggling his way over to the dividing window. He opens it and everyone in the cab turns to look at him. “Hey, we need to stop for coffee.”

“No.” comes Jin’s response. 

Taemin launches into aegyo. “Please hyung? We all really, reeeeeally want coffee.”

“No. You don’t need it this late at night.”

“TT.” Taemin turns to look at Jonghyun. “Hyung, can we get coffee?”

Jonghyun lasts about 0.2 seconds looking at Taemin’s face. “Jin, we’re stopping for coffee.”

Jin sighs heavily and directs the car towards the nearest Dunkin Doughnuts. “Why do I even bother?”

 

By the time they reach the haunted house Taehyung is marginally more awake, still cuddled up to Minho as he sips his coffee and occasionally chiming in with the conversation. He doesn’t seem eager to move from Minho’s lap and Minho is too busy having a crisis to care. Taehyung is too soft, cuddly and warm and Minho is surprisingly reluctant to let the younger crawl away.

“Okay we need to split into groups,”

Jeongguk smiles, “We need three groups of four. “ He turns toward where Yoongi is standing in front of Minho and Taehyung in the bed of the truck, “Hyung wanna be in my group?” Even though he’s looking at Yoongi, Minho nods absently still preoccupied with Taehyung who had yet to move from his lap. 

Taemin laces fingers with Jinki. “Come on, Jimin, be in our group.”

Hoseok looks panicked before throwing himself at Jinki, “Let me be in your group, hyung?” 

“Yeah sure,” Jinki smiles.

“I just don’t see why I can’t just stay out here. And wait.” Key says, crossing his arms and trying to look intimidating despite the fact that he’s scared.

“Babe, that would mean you’d have to sit out here. Alone.” Jonghyun says.

Key latches onto Jonghyun’s arm with a vice like grip. “Let’s get it over with then, yeah?”

“Hey Taehyungie, want to be with me and Namjoon?” Jin asks and Taehyung looks up from his coffee wrinkling his nose. 

“No. Why would I want that?” Taehyung says, trying to keep the scowl off of his face as Seokjin’s face drops. 

“A simple no would have sufficed.” Namjoon pats his husband’s shoulder to comfort him. 

“You wanna join our group?” Minho offers before furrowing his brows and wondering  _ why _ he’d just done that. 

Taehyung turns in Minho’s lap, eyes wide, “Sure, hyung.” 

“Well you guys are going to have to get out of the truck so we can go,” Taemin says.

Sticking his tongue out, Taehyung climbs out. “I was waiting until we had figured out groups, hyung,” he says this as if it’s the most obvious thing in the world as he sips his coffee, innocence all over his face. 

“So what’s your excuse Minho?” Taemin says, laughing as the elder sputters in response. 

“Let’s go, hyung.” Jeongguk whines, tugging on Taemin’s arm. 

They buy the tickets and get the bracelets secured on their wrists.

“This is a maze type haunted house, with multiple entrances and one exit,” the woman at the counter says with a smile. “I wish you the best of luck!”

Hoseok makes a squawking noise as he clings to Jimin before they even enter the attraction. Taemin grins as he pulls his group into the maze. As Hoseok screams when something jumps out at them, Taemin gets an idea.

“I’ll catch up with you guys in a minute, okay?” Taemin says, already pulling away.

“Taemin, babe no, please,” Jinki says as Jimin and Hoseok cling to his sides.

“I’ll be back, don’t worry,” Taemin says. 

He disappears down one of the hallways and Jinki sighs in defeat. 

As he rounds a corner, he hears Taehyung scream and grins. He heads towards them and finds Minho leading the group with Taehyung right behind him, followed a little more slowly by Jeongguk and Yoongi. Taemin waits in one of the hallways that branches out and grabs the back of Taehyung’s neck as he passes. Taehyung squawks in fear before throwing himself into Minho’s arms.

“Something touched my neck,” He hisses, turning to face where he’d felt the touch. It was just too dark to see what it was and he wrinkles his nose in distaste.

Minho stops at that, furrowing his brows, and following his lead Yoongi and Jeongguk slow down as well. 

“That. That doesn’t even make sense Tae-” Yoongi makes a high pitched squeak as hands drop onto his shoulders. Instinctively, Yoongi grabs the hands on his shoulder and flips Taemin over in one smooth motion. 

Taemin catches himself with his feet and beams up at Yoongi from his awkward arched position. “Hey hyung.”

Yoongi narrows his eyes and drops Taemin’s arms. “Little shit.” 

Taemin bounces to his feet, “Yeah that’s me.”

Pouting from behind Minho, Taehyung whines, “Hyung.” 

“Sorry, sorry. It was too easy,” Taemin laughs. 

The younger’s pout deepens. Taemin waves at them before disappearing down one of the other shadowy hallways. Taemin follows the hallways until he finds Key’s familiar scream rising over the rest. He snickers as he trails behind the group, watching Jin “fearlessly” lead the way. He snickers quietly and runs through the halls to get to the one that will put him in front of the group. As they approach the hallway, Taemin jumps out at them. Jin jumps and freezes in surprise, causing Namjoon to trip over him and go sprawling. Key screams and ducks to the ground and Jonghyun only jumps slightly before turning to Taemin with an exasperated look. 

“Was that necessary?” Jonghyun asks, picking Key off the floor. 

“Absolutely,” Taemin says. 

Namjoon gets off the floor, dusts himself off, and looks Taemin directly in the eye. “Fuck you.”

Taemin laughs, “That’s not a very nice thing to say to your hyung.”

He disappears down another hallway before Namjoon can retort. He makes his way back to where Jinki, Jimin, and Hoseok are wandering the hallways. He grabs Hoseok’s waist from behind and the younger lets out a shriek.

“Thank god you’re back. Get us out of here,” Jinki says, reaching back to take Taemin’s hand.

“Hyung I thought you said you knew how to get out of here,” Jimin says, clinging to his shirt.

“I don’t, not really. I thought I did but I was very, very wrong,” Jinki says.

“I’ll say. We still have a ways to go before we’re at the exit,” Taemin says, pulling the group forward.

 

By the time they reach the end of the maze, Jimin and Hoseok are both close to crying. The final jump scare has Jimin clinging to Hoseok, who’s got a handful of Jinki’s shirt. Taemin poses and Jinki looks confused. A bright flash blinds the group and they stumbled out the exit, Taemin bouncing excitedly. He rushes over to the counter, already pointing out the three pictures that include him and his friends. 

“I’ll take all three of those, biggest size you got.” he announces cheerfully, pulling out his wallet. 

Behind him, Jimin throws himself into Taehyung’s arms who begins the process of comforting the other. Rubbing his back, playing with his hair, and talking about things other than the haunted house they just went through. Hoseok whines at the lack of attention and pulls Yoongi into a begrudging embrace. 

“There, there you big dummy,” Yoongi says awkwardly patting Hoseok’s shoulder. 

Taemin cackles as he looks each photo over. His group’s is funny enough with Jimin barely visible behind Hoseok. Minho’s eyes are wide in surprise but it’s anyone’s guess as to why he’s surprised because Taehyung is latched onto his back, completely being supported by the taller man. Jeongguk and Yoongi are pressed close to each other. Jeongguk’s eyes are wide with what looks like wonder and Yoongi looks almost bored.

But it’s the other group’s photo that has Taemin almost falling over laughing. Kibum is blurred in motion as he falls out of frame and Jonghyun looks like he’s in the middle of an undignified squawk. Seokjin has an arm around Namjoon and looks like he’s using him as a human shield whereas Namjoon is staring straight into the camera with a dead look in his eyes.  

“I’m definitely framing these,” Taemin says happily.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> roses are red  
> romance is dead  
> everyday i suffer  
> from existential dread
> 
> a short poem for you. i didnt write it.


	3. can you blow my whistle baby?

[Jackson]

You coming to the party on halloween? You said you’d get back to me? 

[Namjoon]

Yeah bout that… I may have invited 11 people…

[Jackson] 

You have 11 other friends? 

[Namjoon] 

Bitch 

[Jackson]

:)

 

Taehyung grins as Taemin slides him the glitter, “I love body glitter,” he sings. 

Jimin laughs, lightly dusting his own layer of body glitter across his bare chest. He’d forgone a costume in favor just wearing a pair black skinny jeans and a shredded tank top. Hoseok was in a similar get up, hair brushed up out of his eyes. Taemin was in skinny jeans and a sheer black shirt left open to display the crosses hung around his neck. 

Technically speaking, Taehyung was the only one in a costume. Tight blue booty shorts, complete with fishnet tights, and a pink crop top that showed a lethal amount of collarbone make the easiest Harley Quinn costume Taehyung could come up with on short notice. His makeup is already smudged and he looks - 

“Taetae is out to get a man tonight,” Jeongguk teases, entering the room already in his police uniform. 

Jimin wolf whistles, “Said the pot to the kettle.” 

Taemin pushes past the group to go to the kitchen, leaving the four to perfect their looks. It’s only a few minutes before he calls, “Last shots before we leave gentlemen, Taehyung you’re taking one too.” 

The group gathers in the kitchen and Jinki frowns as he takes in Taehyung’s costume and then at Taemin, who shrugs and takes his shot. Taehyung hesitates, watching the others throw back their shots. 

“I can’t believe my children are going out looking like that,” Jinki pouts.

Taehyung rolls his eyes and takes his shot, grimacing at the taste. 

“Be careful, all of you. Call me if you need me,” Jinki says.

The sound of Namjoon honking the horn gets their attention and the group turns to the door, but before he leaves Taemin pulls Jinki into a filthy goodbye kiss. Hoseok rolls his eyes and coughs pointedly. 

“Can we go now that you’re done playing tonsil hockey?” 

 

An hour later Taehyung is drunk and dancing with Jimin, grinding against his best friend.

“Jiminie, pass him to Minho. It’ll be fun,” Taemin sings as he passes by pressed against Jongin. 

Jimin brightens and nods, pushing Taehyung none too gently to Minho who catches him on instinct. Taehyung giggles and looks down. 

“Are you wearing heels?” Minho asks, frowning. 

“Yeah,” Taehyung beams. “It makes it easier to do this,” He drops, skimming his hands down Minho’s sides and thighs. He looks up from under his lashes as he stands back up, reaching around and giving Minho’s ass a teasing squeeze and giggling again. 

Minho’s face is flushed and Taehyung’s drunk brain can’t figure out if it’s because he too is drunk or because it’s hot or or or. He finds he doesn’t care as he loops his arms around Minho’s neck. Minho makes a choked sound and pulls away, murmuring something about getting a drink. Taehyung pouts.  

Soon enough Taehyung is another man’s arms. He introduces himself as Yoon Woo and Taehyung allows him to lead him further onto the dance floor. 

 

Jongin’s hands are familiar as they wind in his hair and Taemin’s hands are wandering under whatever Jongin’s costume is. He doesn’t remember. Or care really. Jongin is hot, he’s drunk, whatever.

“Bathroom?” Jongin asks, breaking the kiss.

Taemin nods and they stumble their way towards where Jackson had said their bathroom was at at some point in the night. It’s unlocked and Jongin opens the door. Taemin breaks the kiss to reorient himself and gets what could be the biggest shock of his life. 

Taehyung is on his knees with a stranger’s hand tangled in his hair. The stranger’s head is thrown back in pleasure and Taehyung doesn’t bother to look behind him when the door opens, still diligently bobbing his head. He only freezes when he hears Taemin’s shocked yelp. 

He turns around, leaving the stranger to cover himself with an annoyed whine. 

“Hyung?” his voice is raspy and Taemin fights the urge to gag.

“ _ Oh my god _ ,” Taemin says.

“We’re going,” Jongin says, pulling Taemin out of the bathroom.

“I have words for you Taehyung-” Taemin is cut off as Jongin shuts the door firmly behind them.

Taehyung shrugs and turns back to Yoon Woo.

 

Jongin tugs him back down the hallway towards the rest of the party.

“Oh my god Jongin,” Taemin says.

“Was that Taehyung?” Jongin asks.

Taemin nods and his drunk head swims, unwilling to cope with the movement. Taemin braces himself against the wall for support and he tries to make the world stop spinning around him. Jongin rubs comforting circles on his back. 

“Don’t throw up. Jackson would never invite us back,” Jongin says.

“I can’t believe- and Taehyung- I don’t-” Taemin isn’t really sure where his sentence is trying to go but he thinks he conveys just how shocked he is.

“Breathe Taemin. He’s not a kid. He can make decisions. We were younger than him when we first hooked up,” Jongin says. 

“But  _ still _ it’s like seeing your own child! Or like walking in on your grandma!”

“Dude. You swore you’d never bring that up again.”

“Sorry. The point still stands.”

“I get it.”

“Oh my god  _ we _ almost hooked up.”

“Yeah?”

“I’m the worst boyfriend ever.”

They see Minho coming down the hallway before Taemin can fully descend into his meltdown.

“Hey, have either of you seen Taehyung?” Minho asks. 

“Nope,” Jongin says.

“Last I saw he was by the punch bowl. Ask Key where he went,” Taemin says.

Minho furrows his brow and makes his way towards where he had seen Key last. Taemin glances over at Jongin and Jongin gives him a half smile that makes his knees weak. Taemin drops his head and decides he’s too drunk to function anymore. 

 

Taemin gets all but dumped off at Jinki’s apartment after the party. He makes his way into the apartment and kicks it shut behind him. He can see where the door to their room is closed and that just makes him feel even more guilty. He drops himself on the couch and puts his head in his hands. He was awful, really. He didn’t deserve Jinki. Jinki was obviously better off without him, so why had he even bothered to drag his sorry ass back to the apartment? He stands, intent on just leaving, when Jinki opens the bedroom door.

“Taemin, you’re back,” Jinki says.

Taemin is suddenly fascinated with his socks. “Yeah,” he mumbles. 

“Are you okay?”

“Yeah.”

“Taemin, look at me.”

Taemin looks past his shoulder, unwilling to look him in the eyes.

“Babe, what’s wrong?”

“Nothing.”

Jinki touches under his chin and Taemin jerks out of reach, drunken legs misstepping and ending up dumping him back on the couch. This proves to be the last thing his drunk mind can process and he starts crying.

“Taemin, babe what’s wrong?” Jinki asks, bewildered.

“I’m the worst,” Taemin cries.

“You aren’t the worst.”

“Yes I am.”

“No you aren’t. Why do you think that?”

“I almost cheated on you.”

“That’s okay.”

“No it’s not! You’re just saying that because I’m drunk.”

“Taemin.”

“You deserve better than me. I didn’t even think about it.”

“Taemin, it’s okay.”

“No it isn’t. The only reason I stopped was because-” Taemin’s mouth snaps shut and he sways dangerously as he stands up. “I want to go to bed now.”

“What happened?”

Taemin shakes his head.

“Taeminnie.”

Taemin makes an expression that’s halfway between disgust and concern. “No.”

“Babe what happened? We can’t keep secrets from each other, remember?”

Taemin’s expression crumbles and he throws himself into Jinki’s arms. “Me and Jongin were going into the bathroom because we were gonna- and then we opened the door- and Taehyung- and I don’t- and it was awful.”

“What happened to Taehyung?” Jinki asks.

“He was on his  _ knees for some slut _ .”

“Alrighty. Bed time. We can try again in the morning.”

Jinki pulls a babbling Taemin back to the bedroom, helping him get out of his ‘costume’ and into the bed. 

 

The next morning Taemin refuses to get out of the bed.

“Come on, rise and shine,” Jinki says cheerfully.

“I’m a piece of shit. Leave me here to die.” Taemin grumbles. 

“Water?”

“I don’t deserve water. I deserve to suffer.”

Jinki sits on the edge of the bed and Taemin pulls the covers over his head. 

“Taemin, you need to take care of yourself.” Jinki says.

“You’re too good for me. I should just go and be a disaster somewhere else,” Taemin says.

He squawks as Jinki scoops him up onto his lap and Adam and Eve move out of their way with disgruntled looks. “I think I’m content with you being  _ my _ disaster.”

“I almost cheated on you!”

“But you’re here, with me. In my arms. You didn’t cheat on me, Taemin.”

“But I almost did.”

“You stopped.”

“What if I didn’t?”

“Then we’ll work through it together.”

“This is what I’m talking about when I say you’re too good for me.”

“So last night you mentioned something about Taehyung.”

Taemin covers his face with his hands. “Oh my god I never want to be reminded of that.”

“Of what?”

“The permanent emotional scarring that left.”

“Why?”

“I walked in on him going down on someone! I’m shocked! Still!” 

“Oh my god.”

“That’s what I’m saying!”

 

The warmth of another person close against his side eventually rouses Minho from sleep. He groans, realizing that he has no clue who the woman at his side is. He doesn’t even remember what she  _ looked _ like. He rolls over, cautiously trying not to wake the person next to him. A familiar mop of red hair comes into his vision and relief surges through him. He vaguely remembers her. Wait. 

The features are mostly obscured by the pillow but he know he recognizes them. He squints in the dim morning light and almost flings himself off the bed when he makes out Taehyung’s sleeping face. Panic surges through him working better than any coffee he’d ever tasted as he pats himself down. Clothes: on. Stickiness: missing. Minho forcibly removes himself from the room. Carefully though, he doesn’t want to wake Taehyung. He’s halfway to the door when he spins on his heel and goes back to his room to snag his packed gym bag. As he’s opening the front door, Yoongi stops him.

“Where you going hyung?” Yoongi asks.

“Gym,” is Minho’s curt response as he pulls the door shut behind him. 

Yoongi frowns in the direction of the closed door. “Is he normally like that?”

Hoseok shrugs.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> sorry we're meme fucks :)


	4. here's the thing, we started out friends

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> are you ready for pining(tm)?

The pounding on the door wakes Jinki up and he groans, searching for his phone to figure out what time it is. His phone says it’s midnight and Jinki briefly wonders if he could just go back to sleep when the pounding on his door increases. Jinki rolls out of bed and promptly trips on his way to the door, falling over none too gracefully. He picks himself off the floor and gets to the door, throwing it open to reveal a distressed Minho. 

“Hyung, I need your help,” Minho says. 

Jinki opens the door further and lets Minho enter the apartment.

“Sorry for the mess, Taemin had recital and didn’t really bother to clean up,” Jinki says. 

“It’s fine,” Minho says, despite how he can’t seem to look away from the mess when Jinki flicks on the lights. 

“So what did you want to talk about?” Jinki asks. 

Minho sits on the couch and puts his head into his hands.

“I’m in trouble hyung,” Minho says. 

Jinki yawns and stretches his arms above his head. “With the law?”

“Not this time.”

“With your parents?”

“No.”

“Then what are you in trouble with?”

“Hyung I’m having  _ feelings _ .”

Jinki laughs. “Congrats, you aren’t a robot.”

Minho gets off the couch and starts to collect some of the items that litter the floor. “No, hyung. I mean- the feelings. The gay ones. I’m having those.”

“Oh, I thought it was gonna be something important.”

“Hyung.”

“Sorry. You’re the last of the boys that’ve come to me with this ‘revelation’ so sorry I’m not surprised.”

“But what do I do?”

“Accept them? It’s natural?”

“Hyung that’s not what I meant. What should I do about Taehyung?”

“What?” 

“Taehyung and how I like him?”

“You like Taehyung?” Jinki asks, bewildered.

“Hyung,” Minho whines.

“Sorry.”

“I like Taehyung. But Jimin would skin me alive.”

“I doubt that. Jin would get there first.”

“Hyung that’s not helping!”

The door opens and Taemin stumbles inside the apartment. He kicks off his shoes as he shuts the door and drops his bag on the floor before falling face first onto the couch. 

“Is he okay?” Minho asks.

“He just needs more rest,” Jinki says. 

Minho dumps the things that he had been holding onto one of their chairs before turning to Jinki. 

“But what should I do hyung?” Minho asks. 

Jinki shrugs. “If you really care about him, go for it. The worst that could happen is he rejects you, right? At least that’ll give you closure.”

Minho watches as Jinki gently lifts Taemin off the couch. Taemin nuzzles closer to Jinki unconsciously and Jinki smiles fondly down at him. 

“Trust me. If you love him, it’s worth it,” Jinki says.

Minho nods as he lets himself out of the apartment so that Jinki can take care of Taemin. He shuts the door quietly behind him and makes his way down the hall. He had been friends with Jinki while he had courted Taemin. Their first meeting had been rough, but Jinki had been hooked. Taemin had been flighty, even more so than he was now, and he hadn’t understood that Jinki had wanted a serious relationship. Taemin had had flings with his dance class and had assumed Jinki to be much of the same. But Jinki had been patient, almost scarily so. And if Jinki could pin down Taemin, Minho was fairly certain he could do the same to Taehyung. 

 

Jimin doesn't know what to do. When it comes to flirting he can do it with the best of them aka Taemin. But when it comes to flirting with Hoseok he’s completely stuck. He feels like everything he says is stupid or cheesy and god forbid he make a fool of himself. And the worst thing is that he knows he shouldn’t even worry about it. He’s been friends with Hoseok since they were in high school. Hoseok has seen  _ everything _ that could possibly embarrass him and yet, he’s still worried about fucking up somehow. 

“Just fucking show up after his dance practice with either a coffee or whatever it is he likes after that sort of thing and ask him out.” Taehyung mumbles, pushing his face into Jimin’s stomach. 

“Bring him a protein shake. Hyung loves those after practice,” Jeongguk says, violently smashing the buttons on his controler. 

Jimin frowns, “It’s not that easy.” 

Taehyung huffs, “Jiminie. I’m saying this from the bottom of my heart. Just fucking do it. Hobi-hyung likes you back. All you gotta do is ask.” 

“But… what about him and Yoongi-hyung?” 

Jeongguk huffs at the mention of his crush and crashes the car in his video game. 

“They’re just fuck-buddies.” Taehyung says, as if it were obvious, and maybe it was. 

“They are?” Both Jimin and Jeongguk seem shocked. 

“How do you know?” Jeongguk says suspiciously.

Taehyung shrugs, “I think they thought I was asleep? Or maybe they just didn’t see me but I was at the loft and they came in a drunk and they were talking about it. Hobi-hyung was really upset because he thought that Jiminie hated him? Or something like that.” 

“How long have you known?” 

Another shrug, Taehyung rolls over to glance at Jeongguk, “Like a few days. I dunno.” 

“And you didn’t tell us?” Jimin squawks, slapping his shoulder. 

“Ah-ah. Be gentle with me. I’m a delicate flower.” 

“You fucker.” 

“You didn’t think that we would want to know about this?” Jeongguk hisses, the game paused as he glares at his friend. 

Taehyung whines, “I found out like two days ago. Be nice to me. I gave you hope.” 

“Taehyungie,” Jimin shoves him off his lap with a wounded noise.

“Jiminie,” He parrots. “Just fucking go for it. You’ve been validated, go forth and conquer Hobi-hyung’s ass.” 

 

So with Taehyung’s blessing, Jimin is at the studio. Holding a shake from Hoseok’s favorite shop and mustering the courage to go inside. He can hear the thumping beat of the music from the closed studio and takes a deep breath. He can do this. 

He pushes the door open and the sight that greets him shocks him to the point he drops the shake. It splatters over his shoes and legs but there’s no time to process that when he can see Hoseok. His face is pressed again the mirror and Yoongi is spewing filth as he pounds into him. A shocked noise escapes his mouth and Yoongi freezes and glances over his shoulder. Jimin can feel his face turning red and jealousy burns through his veins. His fingers curl into fists as Yoongi meets his gaze, mortification making his cheeks flame. Jimin turns on his heel and sprints out the door. 

God of course. He was fucking stupid. Of course Yoongi would be there the first time that he plucks up the courage to ask Hoseok out. He’s torn between thinking that that was the hottest thing he’d ever seen and the worst thing he’d ever witnessed. His hands are trembling with jealous rage and he honestly doesn’t know how he’s ever going to face either of them ever again.  

 

It’s a bad night and Taehyung isn’t sure what to do. It started with a bad day at school, followed by a horrible day at work, completed with his dad shouting at him. He isn’t sure what he’s done to piss the universe off but the way his dad is screaming at him makes him curl in on himself, drowning in self loathing. Taehyung doesn’t have a choice other than to just wait it out, nodding along. When his father is done he stumbles out of his house, wondering who to turn to. 

Seokjin is out of the question and that means so is his husband, Namjoon - who he’d managed to strike up a good friendship with on nights when Seokjin wasn’t there. Jimin and Jeongguk are both away at a dance camp with Hoseok. Taehyung chews on his lip as he walks, meandering through the empty streets. It late, well past midnight and Taehyung idly wonders if wondering the dark streets is a smart idea but he doesn’t want to go home and sitting still sounds like a death sentence so he continues. 

He isn’t paying attention where he’s going and part of him is hoping to get into some trouble. At least if someone kicks the shit out of him he’ll look the way he feels. With his gaze firmly on his feet it isn’t surprising that he bumps shoulder with someone, even this late at night. 

“Taehyung?” The voice is familiar and Taehyung drags his eyes up. He knows his eyes are puffy from crying and concern flits over Minho’s face. 

His voice is quiet, “Hey, Minho-hyung.” 

“Where you headed?” Minho asks, falling into step next to the younger boy. 

Taehyung shrugs, “Nowhere really. Just walking.”

Minho hums , “Mind if I walk with you?” 

“Sure.” Taehyung can’t bring himself to care, even though he doesn’t really want to be left alone. 

They walk in silence for a few minutes, shoulders brushing. Taehyung leads them towards a park. The silence is nice. Minho’s wordless support baffles Taehyung. They don’t really know each other. They’ve hung out a few times in with the rest of their friends but beyond that, Taehyung just doesn’t understand why he’d bother.  

Taehyung sits down on a swing, staring at his toes as Minho takes a seat next to him. 

“Wanna talk about it?” Minho asks, and Taehyung can feel the weight of his gaze. 

Taehyung shrugs, sniffing. “Not much to say. It was just a really shitty day overall.” 

Minho digs his feet into the wood chips below the swings, humming in thought. “What made it shitty?” 

Taehyung snorts, “What didn’t? I failed a quiz today. A customer yelled at me because I didn’t get her food out to them fast enough and didn’t tip on her one hundred dollar bill. And then I got home and my dad yelled at me and I don’t even know what I did.” 

Minho whistles, “That sounds like a rough day.” 

“It was a shit show.” Taehyung agrees. 

It’s quiet for a minute and then Minho sighs. “Well, I don’t know how else to help so wanna go get some ice cream? My treat.”

Warmth blooms in Taehyung’s chest and he nods, smiling shyly. Minho grins in response, pulling Taehyung to his feet and leading him down the street. “So the options for what’s open right now are McDonald’s, a gas station or we can make this an official date and go to Denny’s.” 

“This is a date?” Taehyung asks, blinking up at Minho in surprise. 

Minho hesitates before nodding, “Well, I kinda wanted it to be if that’s okay with you?” 

Taehyung blushes but nods, “Yeah. Yeah. Denny’s sounds good,” he smiles, shyly lacing their fingers together as they walk towards the yellow beacon of Denny’s signage. 

Minho beams at the younger as their tired looking waiter leads them to their seat, “So Taehyung, what brings you into work so late.” 

Taehyung smiles at the waiter, “Denny’s is the only thing open at two in the morning Bryan.” 

“Oh yeah. I forgot what time was for a minute.” Bryan says softly and Taehyung laughs. 

“It happens to the best of us.” 

Bryan sighs, “I’ve been here for so long man. So long. I took a double shift. Just let me know what you want to eat and I’ll get it.” 

Taehyung nods, “Thanks.” 

Bryan goes to walk away before turning around, “Hey Taehyung you’re working a triple tomorrow. Are you gonna be okay? Cause I’m not okay.” 

Taehyung manages a small smile, “I’ll be fine Bryan.” 

“You sure you’re going to be okay?” 

“Bryan? Can you get us some waters?” 

“Yeah. Water. You got it,” Bryan says, walking away and Taehyung puts his head down on the table with a groan. 

“I forgot I work a triple tomorrow, holy fuck.” 

Minho pats Taehyung’s back, “Why the fuck are you working a triple? How long is a triple?” 

“I need the money. And a triple is a solid eighteen hours of hell.”

“That shit should be illegal,” Bryan says setting down the glasses of water on their table before pulling out a pad of paper and a pen, “So Taehyung. What do you want?” 

“Just what I usually get, Bryan.” Taehyung murmurs. 

“And for your…?”

“Date?” 

“Yeah date.” Bryan turns to Minho with a glassy smile on his face. 

Minho orders quickly and Bryan writes it down on his pad, nodding at the pair and walking back into the kitchen. 

Taehyung sighs, shaking his head at his coworker before turning back to Minho and playing with his discarded straw wrapper. 

Their conversation is light while they wait for Bryan to bring out their food and Minho takes great pride in the way that he makes Taehyung laugh, folding in on himself and putting his head down on the table to cover the pretty blush on his cheeks. 

When their food comes around they keep talking animatedly, sharing bites of food. Taehyung waves his hands around as he talks to emphasize his points and Minho can’t help but feel endeared at the sight. 

 

Jeongguk is  _ drunk. _ When he went out he hadn’t intended to get this smashed but he tried to keep pace with Jimin who was definitely drinking to forget. So, he was really really hammered. The room was kinda spinning but he had a target. Logic said that this was a really bad idea, but the drunk part of him said fuck it. He slumps over Yoongi’s shoulder, whining, “Hyung.” 

“Fuck, Gukkie. How much did you drink?” 

Jeongguk makes a noncommittal noise. “Five.”

“Five?” Yoongi asks. To be this drunk he had definitely had more than five drinks.

“Five?” Jeongguk parrots, looking confused.

“We should get you home.” Yoongi decides.

“Home?” Jeongguk says hopefully.

“Who did you come with?”

“Jimin?”

“Who did Jimin come with?”

“Me?”

Yoongi’s drunken mind is frustrated. They had definitely come with someone else. But who? Lightbulb. Namjoon! Namjoon is supporting Jimin as he tries to feed the younger some water.

“Joonnyeong!” Yoongi shouts. Wait, that wasn’t right. “Namyoon! Joon? Jooooooooonie!”

Namjoon turns to look at him with a frown. “I’m busy!”

“I wanna go home!” Yoongi says and Jeongguk slurs something in agreement.

“I didn’t drive you here!” Namjoon protests but soon enough he’s hauling all three of them into his parked car.

The loft a quiet disaster as soon as they stumble in. Namjoon leads Jimin to the bathroom because “hyung, I think I’m gonna puke.” leaving Yoongi to lead Jeongguk into the nearest bedroom. Was it Taehyung’s? He didn’t know. Didn’t care really. It was time to go the fuck to sleep. Jeongguk is nuzzling his neck and slurring about how good he smells. 

Yoongi murmurs, “I know,” as he shuts the door behind them. He gets them laying on the bed and he knows that Jeongguk is fucking hammered because he’s sniffling a bit into his chest and Yoongi cards his hands through the younger’s hair. He shushes him and hums under his breath until Jeongguk’s breathing evens out. 

He sighs. He’s too tired to move and something soft curls in his gut as he looks down at Jeongguk asleep on his chest. All he can think is that Jeongguk is too cute for his own good and that he might just be too weak to keep his distance. What was even holding him back? Why did their age even matter? Fuck. This is too much for how drunk he is. He’ll worry about it later. 

 

The group is loud as they come through the doors and Taehyung finds himself dreading having to serve them. There’s about fifteen of them and one of his coworkers seats them in Taehyung’s section. Awesome. He collects a stack of menus and plasters the smile on his face to go over to them. 

“Welcome to Denny’s, my name is Taehyung and I’ll be your server tonight. Are there any drinks I can get started for you?” Taehyung says automatically as he disperses the menus. 

“We’re waiting on a couple more people actually, but can we get waters for now?” one of the girls asks. 

At any other time besides three in the morning Taehyung would’ve probably been struck by her beauty. As it was, he didn’t have the energy to care. The entire group was dressed a little too nicely for Denny’s, but then again people just ended up here. He smiles blankly at them and leaves to fetch the waters. 

The cook is peeking around the corner warily as Taehyung steps into the kitchen for a moment of peace. He’s been awake for too long, his head hurts and the last thing he wants is to deal with the party of fifteen plus whoever they’re waiting for. The moment he takes to collect himself is brief before he grabs a tray and starts placing water cups on it. The cook looks at him in sympathy and Taehyung sighs. 

The table is loud even as he approaches and his head pounds. He quietly passes the waters around and stands at the head of the table. “How many more will be coming? So I can get some more menus?”

“Well if Jenny comes then three, but that probably means Mark is coming too so four, but wait if Mark comes then Felicia won’t so-” one girl starts.

“At least one, maybe four,” another cuts her off. 

Taehyung nods along absently. There’s a beat where he processes the information and then he walks away to grab a few more menus and set them on the edge of the table. Then he returns to the kitchen, groaning as he makes himself a cup of coffee. Maybe the caffeine would fuel his body for a few more hours. 

“No orders?” 

“Not yet. They’re waiting for-,” Taehyung’s voice sounds broken and he’s cut off by shrill screams from the table. “Oh god I think the rest are here.” 

The cook frowns and tentatively pats Taehyung’s shoulder. “We can do this.”

“But at what cost?” Taehyung whines as he pulls out his notebook and pen. He takes a deep breath and then he’s out. 

The floor is very interesting as he makes his way towards the table. He can hear the chatter coming to a crescendo before a familiar voice cuts over the din.

“I swear to  _ god _ the next one of you to throw something will spend  _ all _ of their next paycheck here to make it up,” a sharp voice snarls at the table. 

Taehyung looks up sharply, “Key?”

Key looks over at him with a startled expression. “Taehyunggie?  _ This _ is the Denny’s you work at?”

“What other Denny’s are there hyung?” Taehyung says, squeaking in surprise when Key pulls him into a tight hug. 

“Were they giving you trouble?” Key asks, glaring over at one of them who has a straw wrapper ready to be launched. He slowly lowers his hand under Key’s glare. 

Taehyung shakes his head, “They were just… loud.” he doesn’t want to make enemies here. He just wants to do his stupid job and collect his stupid paycheck and go back to his stupid house. 

“Well we can order now, let you get that out of the way.”

Nodding thankfully, Taehyung raises his notepad and looks around the table praying the orders aren’t too complicated.

 

Taehyung drops off the check at the table and his wrist is caught by one of the girls.

“Hey, have you ever considered being a model?” she asks him. 

He looks down at himself in confusion. His apron is stained and he knows for a fact that he looks exhausted, because he  _ is _ . He fights back a snort and settles for, “About as much as I’ve considered being the president.”

“No really, you could be.” one of the guys interjects.

Taehyung sighs, “Say I believed you, what modeling agency would even take me?”

“Mine would,” Key smiles up at him as he looks the check over. 

Taehyung frowns, “You own a modeling agency?”

Key shrugs. “Well yeah. It’s kind of my job.”

He levels an unimpressed look at Key, “Well then.” The motions of cashing the group out are achingly familiar, to the point where it’s muscle memory and he isn’t really thinking about it as he slides the card and hands Key the receipt. 

Key puts his arm around Taehyung’s shoulder as the other models file out the door. “All I’m saying is to think about it. It would be fun, and they’d love you.”

“It does sound fun,” Taehyung admits, “But I don’t know, hyung. It just… I don’t think I’d be any good at it anyway.”

“Tell you what, come and try it out. Then you can see if you like it.”

Taehyung takes one look at Key and knows that he’s not going to take no for an answer and sighs, “Okay. I’ll try it.” 

“Fantastic!” Key beams. “Don’t tire yourself out too much with the rest of your shift. And eat something, will you?” 

Shrugging off the older’s concern, Taehyung smiles weakly as he leaves before turning back to the mountain of dishes left behind. On the table is an obscenely large tip and Taehyung stares at it blankly, struggling to process the sheer amount before he slowly folds it up and slips it into his pocket. 

The rest of his shift consists of doing the dishes from Key’s modeling group and drinking coffee with the cook until his replacment, Ana, arrives around five am. He packs up his things, wrapping a scarf around his neck and stepping into the brisk autumn air. The walk home is nice. There isn’t much going on at five in the morning and when Taehyung opens his door, he’s surprised to find his dad is home.

Seojun scowls as Taehyung toes off his shoes. “Nice of you to come home.” 

“I was at work,” Taehyung says softly. 

His father scoffs and Taehyung ducks his head wondering what it was going to be this time. Was it his grades again? The choice of friends he had? The fact that he was gay? There were too many choices and Taehyung can’t help but feel bitter about the way his dad is treating him. But he doesn’t want to leave him like his mom or Seokjin. 

The words Seojun yells don’t quite process, but Taehyung nods all the same watching him carefully. It’s a sudden movement and Taehyung has to duck out of the way as his dad sends the remote hurling his way. 

“What the fuck?” The words are out before he can stop them and Taehyung feels fear settle into his stomach as Seojun stands. 

“What was that?” 

“Nothing,” he says meekly, yelping when his dad takes a firm grip of his arm yanking him closer. 

“I never want to hear you talk back to me like that again. Understood?” 

Taehyung looks away from his father’s angry expression and Seojun shakes him like a ragdoll. “Understand?” 

“Yes! Yes I understand.” Taehyung snaps, and his father lets him go. He scrambles up the stairs to his room, slamming the door shut behind him. His heart is thrumming in his chest and his eyes sting with unshed tears but he locks the door behind him before flopping into bed. He only has a few hours before school and he  _ needs _ to get as much sleep as he can. So he shoves the anxiety aside and buries himself in his covers and hopes for sleep. 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> don't drink to forget friends.


	5. tell your boyfriend, if he says he’s got beef, that i’m a vegetarian and i aint fuckin scared of him

 

Jimin pounds on the door to Jeongguk’s room. “Jeon Jeongguk open the door right now.”

“No,” it’s muffled. “Go away.”

“Jeongguk,” Jimin warns. 

There’s a pause and then Jeongguk is stomping to the door. “What do you want?” he snaps. 

“I think the better question is what is up with you?” 

Jeongguk pouts. “It’s nothing.” 

“Nothing? You’ve been pouting in your room for like two days. Don’t bullshit me.” 

His pout deepens, “I suck.”

“You suck... dick?” 

“Jimin… I’m awful at everything and nothing is going right.” Jeongguk grumbles, flopping dramatically onto his bed. 

Jimin frowns. Everyone knows that Jeongguk holds himself to ridiculous standards. He’s the golden maknae so he has to be perfect. “Gukkie… What’s going on?” 

“I can’t do it right.” 

Taking a deep breath, Jimin looks up at the ceiling for a moment before moving to sit next to Jeongguk, rubbing a hand between the younger’s shoulder blades. 

There’s a wetness that Jeongguk’s voice that has Jimin scrambling to pull him into a hug, “My dance instructor told me that I wasn’t good enough. I kept messing up on a step because I twinged my knee and she just kept on telling me that if I didn’t get my shit together I wouldn’t be able to be in the showcase.” 

“Jeonggukie… You’re an amazing dancer and it’s not fair of her to say that to you when you were injured.”

“Still. Just because my knee hurts a little bit doesn’t mean I can slack off.”

“You don’t have to be perfect all the time, Guk.”

“Yes I do. Because otherwise no one cares. It’s always ‘Jeonggukie is so good at this’ or ‘he’s perfect’ and I’m not but everyone thinks I am and that’s the only way I matter to people is if I’m the  _ golden maknae _ . So I have to be perfect.” 

Jimin freezes at the outburst, still clinging to the, now sobbing, boy. With one hand he strokes the hair at the nape of Jeongguk’s neck and with the other he pulls out his phone and sends out an SOS to the only person he can think of. 

**To: minty hyung**

_ please help jeongguk is upset  _

_ he’s under the impression that he has to be perfect _

**From: minty hyung**

_ fuck _

_ i’ll be there in like ten _

_ gonna pick up some lamb skewers for him _

  
  


The first thing Taemin becomes aware of is a steady beeping. His eyes fly open in panic and the beeping intensifies. Jongin is hovering over him instantly, trying to calm him down. 

“What happened?” Taemin asks.

“You over exhausted yourself. Again,” Jongin says.

Taemin sighs and looks up at the IV bag they have him on. 

“How long am I here?”

“Until tomorrow morning.”

“Did you tell Jinki?”

“I knew you wouldn’t want me to.”

“Thank-you.”

“Why not tell him?”

“He has a big presentation coming up. I don’t need him to be worrying.”

“I think he’d still want to know.”

“Maybe.”

Jongin sighs and leans back in his chair. “You need to take better care of yourself. Especially now that you’re working too.”

“Yeah, I know. Lots of things are going on right now.” Taemin says with a sigh.

Jongin laces their fingers together. “I’m always here for you.”

Taemin smiles broadly, “I know you are.”

 

When he’s released from the hospital, Jongin is there to drive him back to the dorms. 

“We have rehearsal tonight, will you be okay?” Jongin asks.

“I’ll be fine Nini.”

“You say that, and yet.”

“You’ll be there with me, it’ll be okay.”

Jongin rolls his eyes but doesn’t argue anymore.

“Besides, you’ll keep me hydrated,” Taemin says as he nudges Jongin. 

 

The bar is dimly lit, but it isn’t too packed and Minho appreciates that. This was a spur of the moment choice and only a few of them could come. Kibum had been the one to suggest it and Jonghyun was never one to say no to him. Jinki and Namjoon tagged along just for something to do since both of their boyfriends had taken a night shift. Jimin and Taehyung were always ready for a party and if he was honest, Minho wasn’t sure why he was here. He ignores the small voice in the back of his mind that says he knows exactly why he’s out and it’s something to do with how he wants to be near Taehyung but details. Jinki throws him the  _ look _ that seems to convey ‘don’t do anything stupid’ perfectly. 

Taehyung immediately makes his way to the bar and Minho tries really hard not to stare at his ass as he sways through the crowd. Jimin’s smirk is enough to tell him that he’s not succeeding. He makes conversation with Jonghyun to pass the time as Taehyung comes back with the first round of drinks. He and Jimin take a swift couple of shots before melting into the dance floor and Jonghyun follows after them.

Kibum ropes him, Namjoon, and Jinki into a drinking game that he swears is fun. And it is fun, for the first couple of shots. After the fifth one, Minho isn’t convinced it’s a very fun game anymore and he can tell the others think the same. Jinki’s head is resting on the table and he’s murmuring something that Minho can’t make out. Namjoon has his head tipped back and he’s staring at the ceiling.

“Have you ever thought… about how our lives are kind of like specs of dust. I mean, they’re all floating around, insignificant to everyone else around them. That’s kind of like  _ our _ lives,” Namjoon says.

“Stop,” Key groans, swaying in his chair and looking deep in thought. “That hurts my brain. I can’t think.”

Minho glances around the dance floor for Taehyung. When he spots Jimin but not Taehyung he turns his attention to the bar. Taehyung’s head is tilted in interest and some other man has a hand resting on his waist. He can’t make it out completely clearly but Taehyung leans in and jealousy surges in his chest. 

The man hands Taehyung a drink and slides his hand from Taehyung’s waist to Taehyung’s ass, giving it a squeeze. Taehyung scowls and shoves the man away, a forced smile returning to his lips. Minho can’t help but wonder what kind of game Taehyung is playing as he sips his drink, littering lingering touches on this stranger. He narrows his eyes because wait. He wants to  _ be _ that stranger, receiving Taehyung’s touches and laughter. He wants to touch Taehyung’s ass without giving a fuck like the stranger seems so intent on doing even though Taehyung clearly isn’t feeling it. He frowns. Wait. Taehyung isn’t feeling that stranger feeling him up. Maybe he should do something? 

It isn’t until the stranger pulls Taehyung close and kisses him that Minho stands. Jinki startles and slips out of his chair to crumple on the floor. Frankly he isn’t sure what he’s gonna do, but he’s gonna do and then maybe Taehyung will let him kiss him. 

“The fuck are you doing?” Jinki asks him, squinting up at him. 

“I’m gonna go fight that bitch,” Minho says. 

“Fighting?” Namjoon asks. “Isn’t it odd that we fight amongst ourselves when in reality we should be fighting-”

“Namjoon stop,” Key cuts him off with a groan.

Minho marches towards Taehyung and the stranger. Taehyung seems to have given up, arms resting at his sides and eyes closed. The stranger’s got a hand at the back of Taehyung’s neck and his tongue in the other’s mouth and Minho shoves him away from Taehyung. 

“Minho!” Taehyung beams, grabbing his drink and holding it to his chest protectively. 

Minho’s heart stops at the smile before turning back to the stranger. Then his fist is crashing into the stranger’s face in a pleasing punch and the stranger is scrambling back to his feet. Minho realizes slightly too late that being drunk was not exactly conducive to fighting. The stranger is able to throw him off balance with a punch of his own and Minho lands on his ass. The stranger is on top of him, pinning him to the ground and pulls his fist back to punch Minho again. 

Jinki comes out of nowhere, blindsiding the man and getting in a few punches of his own before the stranger can collect himself. Jinki laughs as the man is held back by some of the bar staff and Jonghyun is pulling at them to get them to back down. Jonghyun all but pushes them out of the bar and guides all six of the drunks back to the truck. 

“That was fun,” Jinki says happily. 

“We got kicked out of another bar.” Jonghyun grumbles, going to start the engine. 

Taehyung crawls into the bed of the truck, and the rest follow his drunken lead. Jimin makes a quick headcount before cracking the window, “We’re all here.” 

Jonghyun gives a tight smile and flashes a thumbs up at him. Jimin beams at him before closing the window and curling up in Namjoon’s lap. Taehyung is humming quietly to himself as he sits in the corner, watching Minho grumble under his breath about no good strangers and Key singing off-key pop songs. They’re about half way back to the loft when Jinki’s face crumples and he starts sobbing.

“Oh my  _ god _ ,” he says.

Taehyung’s first instinct when faced with tears is physical affection so he crawls over to his hyung and pulls him into a sloppy hug.

“I’m gonna- have to- explain to- Taemin- that i got- kicked out- of another bar,” Jinki sobs.

Taehyung sloppily strokes Jinki’s face, “Shhh. Hyung. It’s okay. I’m sure…” he trails off. 

“He’s gonna  _ hate _ me,” Jinki whines, pulling Taehyung into his lap to cuddle him like a teddy bear.

Minho glares from his seat as Taehyung continues to slur half-assed comforting words to Jinki. The whole point of the fight was to get Taehyung to cuddle - or kiss -  _ him _ . Not Jinki. 

“Even when he’s drunk Jinki has more game than you,” Key stage whispers. 

Minho pouts, shoving Key before Jonghyun shouts to “stop being stupid back there.” Key bonelessly melts into Namjoon’s side with a drunken smile on his face. 

Namjoon likes the coffee shop on the corner. Most people just brush past it in their hurry to work, which made it nice and quiet for days like this. Currently, Seokjin was seated across from him, slumped over the table and clutching a mug filled with sugary coffee. 

“Go over it one more time,” Namjoon says, linking his fingers with his husband’s.

“Taehyung and I got into a fight forever ago, and he still hates me. What more is there to say?” Seokjin says, looking up at Namjoon.

For someone who had been crying, Jin still looked amazing. 

“I’m sure he doesn’t hate you,” Namjoon says. 

“I would like to point out every interaction that we’ve had. He hates me, it’s obvious.”

“He’s probably just… frustrated, with the situation.”

“ _ I’m _ frustrated with the situation!”

“You have to look at it from his perspective. You moved out, your mom died, he’s alone with your dad who’s kind of an asshole. He probably feels like you abandoned him.”

Jin shifts to look at him with danger in his eyes and Namjoon freezes. Shit. Emotional landmine.

“I didn’t  _ abandon _ him!” Jin says.

“I never said you did,” Namjoon placates, “I’m just saying that Taehyung is  _ lonely _ and I don’t think he knows how to reach out to you.”

There’s a moment of tense silence as Seokjin stares into his coffee. “I keep trying to reach out to him but he doesn’t let me. I just want to talk to him. I’m worried about him…” 

 

Taemin leans against the doorframe as he watches Taehyung get ready for his night out. “Can we talk?”

Taehyung turns, “What about hyung?” he asks innocently, unease curling in his stomach regardless.

“Okay, look. I’m not trying to tell you how to live your life, but. I was a lot like you- worse actually. And I get it, yay random hookups but um, maybe slow down? I mean it’s not like you have to  _ stop _ but I just want you to make sure you’re safe and everything.”

Guilt sinks into Taehyung’s bones as he smiles at Taemin, “I don’t mind the lecture and I’ll be careful but um. What brought this on?”

Taemin sighs and ruffles his hair. “Taehyung. I’ve been there. I can recognize that look in your eyes, even if the rest of them can’t. I get it. The best way to get over the hatred is to get under someone.” Taemin looks at his feet. “I think I understand that the best out of anyone here.”

Taehyung looks away from Taemin, avoiding his own reflection. “I think you’ve got it wrong hyung. But thanks for worrying about me.” The lie falls flat. 

Taemin bounces over to him, pulling him into a hug. “I’m here if you want to talk, really,” he says before pulling away. “I’m going to go sleep? Because that filled the emotion quota and also I haven’t slept for 48 hours.” He laughs hollowly before leaving the room. 

He can’t meet his gaze in the mirror and he sighs, figuring he probably looks as good as he’s gonna get anyway. He hates that Taemin hit the nail on the head and now he feels worse. Because before it was just him hurting, no one knew. Sure they might be concerned but no one understood why he’s doing this. And now he can’t pretend anymore. He shakes his head to clear it of those thoughts. Because now he’s sad. And drinking while sad is a big no-no. 

 

The music is blasting so loud that Taehyung can feel it in his bones. People are crowded in the house, all trying to fit in and fighting their way towards the bar in the far corner of the basement. More than half of the people are already drunk, and the multiple drinking games that are scattered in the room only serve to help that. Jeongguk drags him into the corner where an intense game of rage cage is getting underway. Taehyung isn’t  _ awful _ at the game, but Jeongguk is better. He cages Taehyung so many times that he loses count, and in the end he also gets the bitch cup because apparently  _ that _ is how his night is going. He’s buzzed by the end of the first round, and definitely tipsy by the end of the third. Jeongguk laughs at him as he clings to his side. 

Jeongguk helps him sit down at the side of the room before going over to challenge Jimin at beer pong. Taehyung leans his head against the wall in the attempt to get the room to stop spinning. When he looks back at the beer pong table, strangers are facing off shirtless. He looks around for either one of the familiar faces but can’t find anyone in the sea of drunk girls and frat boys. He gets himself up with minor swaying before making his way towards the bathroom. He locks the door behind him and stumbles to the sink where his own ghastly reflection is staring back at him. 

“Holy shit have I looked like that all night?” Taehyung asks his reflection. 

He only gets silence in return. He leans his head against the cool mirror and wonders how exactly he had gotten here. He has some regrets for the evening, he realizes. Maybe it would’ve been better to just stay at the loft. With his friends. With Minho. Wait. He frowns at his reflection and it frowns back at him. Why with Minho? Whenever he thought of Minho, his head got all weird. Did he like him?

“Do I like him?” he asks. 

Pounding on the door startles him out of his introspection and he stumbles to the door, unlocking it. A girl pushes past him and goes to throw up in the toilet. Her friend puts her hand on Taehyung’s shoulder. 

“Are you okay?” she asks.

“Yeah. Yeah I am,” Taehyung says. 

“Okay.” 

Taehyung makes his way back into the party, catching a drunk girl as she trips and almost falls.

“Oh! Thanks!” she says as she straightens up. “You’re fucking beautiful, by the way. Don’t forget that.” She says it with all the seriousness her drunken state can manage. 

“Okay?”

The music is starting to hurt his head and he pulls out his phone to check for messages, realizing that he got no service in the basement. He makes his way carefully up the stairs, trying to avoid the drunk frat boys as they push past him on the stairs. He makes it up without incident and finds that it was way cooler up here as opposed to downstairs. He looks around for either Jimin or Jeongguk. He can’t find either of them. He frowns and makes his way into a room that’s semi quiet before scrolling through his contacts and finding Jimin’s name. He wants to go home. 

“Hello?” a groggy voice answers.

“Jiminnie where are you? I wanna go,” Taehyung slurs. 

“Taehyung is that you?”

“Who else would it be?”

“Baby where are you?”

“At the frat party, duh. Imma living room I think.”

“Hang on I’m gonna come get you.”

“Okay good I wanna go.”

“Stay put and I’ll come find you.”

Taehyung agrees and hangs up in relief. Good. Jimin would come get him and he could get away from this stupid party. He finds himself giggling at some story that a girl next to him is telling. Someone is suddenly tapping his arm and he looks up into the face of Jinki.

“Hyung! You’re here!” Taehyung exclaims. “I didn’t know you went to frat parties.”

“I don’t. Let’s get you home. Do you know where Jimin and Jeongguk are?”

“I called Jimin. He’s supposed to be coming to get me so I can leave.”

“You called me instead.”

“Oh no!”

Taehyung can feel his face morph into an exaggerated expression of shock before he looks back to Jinki. Jinki smiles down at him and pulls him to his feet, supporting him as he sways. By some miracle Jinki manages to find both Jeongguk  _ and _ Jimin and Taehyung starts to think that Jinki might have some sort of super power. Jinki loads them into his car which looks really really nice.

“Hyung what if I throw up in the car?” Jeongguk asks as Jinki buckles him in. 

“Well then at least you’ll feel better,” Jinki says.

He straps in Jimin as well and Jimin grabs at his face. “You’re the best hyung ever but shhhh. You don’t want to get the others jealous.”

“Thanks, Jimin,” Jinki says. 

He buckles Taehyung into the front seat and Taehyung squints at him. “Do I like you?”

“I sure hope you do,” Jinki says, starting the car. 

“How do I know if I  _ like  _ like someone?”

“You think about spending your time with them.”

“But I do that with all my friends.”

“This is a bit different. You just kind of think that, hey, maybe it would be nice to see them as the one you wake up next to in the mornings.”

“Oohh.” Taehyung still has no idea what he means. 

They get to the loft and Jinki helps the three of them inside. Jinki goes to get them glasses of water and Taehyung makes his way down the doors of identical hallways. Hallway of identical doors. He wants bed. He pushes open a door that seems to be more familiar than the rest and flops into the bed. There’s a grunt as whoever else is in the bed gets landed on. 

“Taehyung?” Taemin’s sleepy voice slurs.

“Hyung,” Taehyung greets and he winds his limbs around Taemin. 

Taehyung nuzzles into Taemin’s side. “Do I like Minho?”

“You might.”

Taemin seems to be drifting in and out of sleep and Taehyung yawns, drunk mind trying to get used to the sensation of the room spinning as he lies down.

“Hyung stop the room,” Taehyung says.

“Sorry.” 

Jinki peeks his head into the room. “Taehyung I have water for you.”

“I love water. Water’s the best.”

“The best,” Taemin sleepily echos. 

 

A shrill alarm drags Taehyung from blissful sleep and he groans. The sound hurts his head and he burrows closer to the body he’s curled around. Wait. Shit. Mistakes were made last night. Taehyung cautiously rolls away only to roll into another body. Fuck. He’s officially fucked up this time. One person is alright, not favored but eh he’s on par with his current downward spiral. But two? Oh no. He is the trash lord and it’s time to be taken out to the dumpster, where he belongs. But wait. His clothes are still on and the voice that groans is at least familiar. 

“Jinki I swear to god,” Taemin hisses. 

Jinki groans and Taehyung relaxes. He’s with Jinki and Taemin. Everything is fine. Hold on. How did he get here? Why did he end up with Taemin and Jinki? Ugh, his head hurts to much for this and finally Jinki turns off his alarm. Jinki rolls out of the bed, letting cold air under the sheets. 

Taehyung whines, curling closer to Taemin and pulling a pillow over his head. Taemin throws an arm over his eyes. 

“Bye Jinki,” Taemin says.

Taehyung manages a grunt that sound vaguely like “bye” half muffled by the pillow. Jinki laughs quietly as he moves around the room to gather his things for work. When he’s ready he presses a kiss to both of their heads before leaving the room. 

Taehyung rises around two in the afternoon. As soon as he’s upright his head is spinning and he stumbles his way to the bathroom. When he doesn’t throw up, it’s kind of a relief but at the same time he kind of wished he would. He sits on the floor for a while, just to be sure keeping his eyes closed and rubbing his temples. When he deems himself suitable to move he makes his way into the kitchen, fumbling for a glass of water. 

“He lives,” Jimin teases and Taehyung scowls in response. 

“Suck my dick, Minnie.” 

Jimin cackles, “Good morning to you too sweet cheeks.” 

Jeongguk gives a groan. “Hyung make me breakfast.”

“What, just because I’m the only functional one?” 

“Please?” Taehyung chimes in. 

Jimin rolls his eyes but gets up to cook breakfast. He hums to himself as he cooks and Taehyung’s head throbs. Hangovers suck. Jeongguk crawls over to Taehyung seeking attention.

“Hyung…” he whines.

“Get off me this is your fault you caged me so many times.” Taehyung hisses, swatting at the younger. 

Jeongguk pouts up at him, wielding his puppy dog eyes as his weapon.

“How much did you even drink last night?” Jimin asks. 

“I don’t know. I lost track.” Taehyung says. 

“Dude you should know your limits.”

“If Jinki wouldn’t have gotten us, we would’ve been dead!”

“You don’t know that.”

“No, but I do know we would’ve passed out at the frat house and no one wants to pass out at a frat house.”

“I’m sorry, I forgot we had to keep an eye on you!”

“If Jinki heard that he would kill you.”

“You left him  _ alone _ at the frat house?” Taemin’s voice says from behind them, sounding deeper with sleep. 

Jimin shrieks, dropping the chopsticks. Taemin is bundled in blankets and shuffles into the room. “You left him alone?” he repeats.

“Jeongguk was looking after him,” Jimin says.

“I was  _ what _ .  _ You _ said that it was a good idea to bring him along,” Jeongguk says. “I set him down for half a minute and he was gone!”

“I am never partying with you guys again,” Taehyung says. “I’ll go party with Jinki, he’ll take care of me.”

“Oh that’s right, because you’re the favorite child.” Jeongguk says saltily. 

“Now now, children. No fighting at the table.” Taemin says. 

“I’m going back to sleep. In my own room this time.” Taehyung says, proudly marching down the hall.

“Is there gossip I’m missing?” Jimin says.

“No gossip, he crawled into my bed last night.” Taemin says.

Jimin pouts, “He didn’t even come in to cuddle with me.”

“Probably because you left him alone at the frat house.” Taemin says. 

“Hyung!”

 

Taemin shuffles into his room and turns on the light. There’s an ungodly sound from the lump on the bed and Taemin flips them back off, plunging the room back into darkness.

“Dude.” Taemin says. 

“I’m sorry hyung. Your room has blackout curtains,” Taehyung whines. 

“You know who else’s room has blackout curtains? Minho’s room. You should go crawl into his bed.”

“I am  _ not _ crawling into his bed.”

“You weren’t saying that halloween night. Or last night for that matter.”

“Hyung.”

“Well I’m not wrong.”

“I don’t even remember what I said last night.”

Taemin sits on the bed beside him. “Well, I seem to remember you having a crisis over a certain strapping athlete last night.” he pauses. “Oh god I am never saying that again.”

“Let’s not talk about it then, great!”

“Oh we are talking about it.”

“Why?”

“Because you need to face your feelings.”

“Or I can run from them. Feelings are gross.”

“We’re going to talk about this.”

Taehyung whines and buries his face in the pillows. His voice is muffled when he speaks up again. “Do we have to?” 

“Yes! This is the second time you’ve brought this up while drunk! It’s obviously bothering you”

A garbled noise makes it’s way from the lump of blankets and Taemin rolls his eyes, gathering every last ounce of patience in his body.

“I don’t even know how I feel.  _ That’s _ what’s bothering me. Not Minho-hyung.” 

Taemin sits on the side of the bed. “Look, if I know anything about Minho, and I probably know too much, it’s the fact that he’s a gentleman. So if you don’t make the first move, you’ll end up pining after him forever.”

Taehyung rolls over, blankets pulled up to his nose so only his wide eyes are peering at Taemin and sighs, “I just. I’m a mess and no one.  _ No one _ really needs to deal with that.” 

“Oh for fuck’s sake. Look, he likes you. He’s not subtle, you aren’t either. If you want, I could come up with a plan to help you capture him?”

“Is Minho-hyung a wild animal now?” a small smile is creeping across Taehyung face. Yes good. That was what Taemin wants to see. 

“No, he’s prey,” Taemin says with a sly look. “It’s hunting time and it’s Minho season.”

Taehyung laughs, rolling closer to push his face into Taemin’s thigh as he giggles. “If you say so hyung.” 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> pls love our cross-over rare pair   
> we really are fueled by comments and kudos  
> thanks for reading <3


	6. i wish i could believe you'd never wrong me

The first thought that goes through Taehyung’s mind as he reads the text from Jimin is that his dad is home. They’re going to stop by to take him out to do something questionably legal and his dad is  _ home _ . He scrambles for his shit, peeking out from behind his door. It’s not that he doesn’t love his dad but his dad has been… touchy lately. Taehyung is never sure what’s going to set him off.

He walks down the stairs as quietly as he can and sets his bag down by the door. Sighing softly, he walks into the kitchen to get a drink. They should text him when they get here and he can just quietly slip out and text his father later. 

The doorbell ringing startles him and he freezes when he hears his father grumble and stagger towards the door. The shoots Taehyung a scathing look as he passes, “Do  _ you  _ know who’s at the door?” 

He nods, “Yeah. Jimin.” 

Seojun’s scowl gets darker and he grumbles something about how  _ useless _ Taehyung is. Taehyung bows his head, hovering behind his dad as he yanks the door open. Jimin is tapping at his phone but Taemin beams as soon as the door swings up. Jeongguk waves at Taehyung smiling. Seojun turns to look at Taehyung. “I thought you said it was just Jimin?” 

“I thought it was. I didn’t know Taemin-hyung and Jeongguk were coming with him to pick me up,” there’s a frantic note in how quick Taehyung is to explain himself that Taemin purses his lips at. 

Taemin smiles at Seojun as he turns back to face them. “We’re sorry sir, he was picking us all up and so we figured we’d all go to the door. My name is Lee Taemin, sir, it’s a pleasure to meet you.”

Taehyung just looks wide-eyed as he throws his bag over his shoulder and attempts to slink out the door. Seojun grabs him as he passes and Taehyung suppresses a soft noise of fear. The tension is palpable and Taehyung just wants to get  _ out _ .

“Of course. Give me just one minute with Taehyung and I’ll let you on your way.” his dad’s smile is fake and something twists in Taehyung’s gut. 

He pulls Taehyung into the hall, turning so he’s blocking Taehyung from view. “Listen. There better not be any stupid shit going on wherever it is you’re going.”

Taehyung nods, “Of course not.” 

“And when you get home we’re going to have a chat about why you’re fucking around during the semester when you have midterms coming up.” 

His dad’s socks are dirty and he has a hole in the toe on the right foot. He nods. “I understand.” his voice is soft. 

“Get out of my sight.” 

Taehyung scrambles past his dad, easing the door shut and ignoring Taemin’s concerned stare. 

 

Having such a large group of friends is nice, but also a little bit awkward because Seokjin is an unquestioned part of the gang and well, things have been strained since the funeral. They used to be close, but after their mom died things just went to shit in all sorts of ways. Seokjin had moved out years ago but before their mom died he’d always visit and now he just doesn’t have that option. 

It hadn’t been until after everyone had walked away, leaving just the two of them standing by the grave that things had gone south. They hadn’t really talked much before that moment. Taehyung doesn’t remember what Seokjin had said to set him off, but he does remember that it had resulted in the worst fight he’d ever had with his brother. To the point where things are still awkward. Every time Seokjin so much as looks at him he remembers the way they’d screamed at each other.

So he hops from person to person, trying to distract himself from the way Seokjin’s eyes linger on his back when he thinks he’s not looking. That’s how he ends up sitting on the sofa in the warehouse loft next to Minho. Or so he tells himself. 

It’s early evening and Taehyung allows himself to melt into the couch, resting from his shitty day at work and knowing it’s only going to get worse once fall break ends. Minho lifts a bundle of joints and offers them around the circle and Taehyung impulsively takes one. 

Raising a brow Minho asks, “You ever smoked before?” 

“No.” 

Minho chuckles, “It’ll be easier if we do this,” he says, taking a long drag of his own before leaning close to Taehyung, releasing the smoke into Taehyung’s waiting mouth. Taehyung inhales on instinct coughing softly into his hand. 

An annoyed sound comes from someone across the room and Taemin shouts. “No no, you’re doing it all wrong. Allow me to demonstrate.” 

Taemin pulls Jinki close as Jinki takes a long drag of his joint and then presses their lips together in a filthy open mouthed kiss. Taehyung’s cheeks turn pink and he glances at Minho through his lashes. Taemin breaks the kiss, making sure to make eye contact with Taehyung as he exhales. “That’s how it’s done.” 

Taehyung doesn’t say anything, just looks at Taemin in shock. Minho makes a disgusted sound, “I was trying not to be lewd.” 

“Sure you were. You just didn’t want to scare him,” Jonghyun teases quietly. 

Minho flushes at that, looking away from Taehyung. And Jimin perks up, “Oh I don’t think he’d mind.” 

“Jiminie,” Taehyung whines, burying his face into his hands. 

“He just doesn’t want to blow that he has a crush on you too,” Jimin continues, heedless of Taehyung’s embarrassed noises.

Taehyung stands abruptly, face red and he rushes straight for the door. His hands shake as he lights his joint, standing just to the side of the warehouse door. The smoke burns his throat and he coughs but it’s better than the lingering embarrassment so he just takes another drag. He’s only alone for a few minutes before Minho walks out and stands next to him. 

“You okay?” 

Taehyung nods, “Yeah.” 

“Are you sure?” 

“Yes. I was just… embarrassed I guess.” Taehyung sighs, taking another drag. It’s smoother this time, no coughing. 

Minho frowns, “What were you embarrassed about?” 

To avoid answering Taehyung holds his joint to his lips and sighs. The silence is faintly awkward, mostly Minho staring at Taehyung waiting for his reply and Taehyung blatantly ignoring it. After a moment Taehyung breaks the silence. 

“I just.” He blows smoke into the air, “I really like you and Jiminie saying it like that in front of everyone was just… embarrassing, I guess.” 

“You like me?” Minho repeats dumbly. 

“It’s okay hyung. I wouldn’t like me back anyway. Sorry. I’ll just… go home.” 

Before Minho can gather his blazed wits Taehyung scrambles up the stairs. The loft is eerily quiet and all eyes are on him as he grabs his bag and throws it over his shoulder. 

“So… how’d it go?” Taemin drawls. 

“Well, he fucking hates me. I hate me. Everything is awful and I’m going home.” Taehyung says, leaving before the stoned group can so much as process what he said. 

“That fuck,” Taemin says. 

Minho wanders back into the room looking dazed and confused. Taemin, who isn’t as high as the rest of them, stands to glare at him.

“Minho what the fuck!” Taemin says.

“I’ll kill him,” Jimin says, struggling to get himself off the couch.

Hoseok holds him back and Taemin shakes his head. “Minho, honestly what did you do?”

“I didn’t… Nothing… What did I do wrong? Why did he leave?” Minho says. 

Taemin puts his head in his hands. “Oh my god! Did you respond to him? When he confessed?”

“I… No… He left. So fast.” Minho says.

“You useless stoner. When someone confesses to you, you need to respond.”

Minho shrugs helplessly. 

 

The door clicks softly behind him and he hopes his dad isn’t home. But today isn’t going in his favor so of course Seojun is waiting for him, arms crossed over his chest and a disappointed scowl on his lips. Taehyung curls into himself, trying to convey without words that he wasn’t going to fight that he doesn’t want to be yelled at. 

It doesn’t matter because Seojun’s nostrils flare and he’s in Taehyung’s space holding him up by the front of his shirt. 

“Do I smell weed?” 

“N-no,” Taehyung stammers, off balance and on his toes. 

Seojun curls his lips, “Really? Because I’m pretty sure I do. And I think I remember telling you not to be stupid. And yet here you are. Fucking up as always. Why do you never listen?” He shoves Taehyung back and he stumbles before catching himself. 

“I’m sorry I just. I’m sorry.” 

“You’re fucking useless.” 

Something sparks in his veins and Taehyung can’t keep quiet, “I’m not. Stop saying that. I’m not useless.” 

“Yes. You. Are.” his father hisses the words and punctuates his point with a backhanded slap across Taehyung’s cheek. “Everyone knows it. Your mother did. Your brother does. I can see it right here.”

“That’s not true,” he argues and his father slaps him again, the same cheek. The force snaps his head to the side and he whimpers, cradling his aching jaw. He doesn’t say anything, can’t think past the whispering of  _ your own father hates you too _ . He grabs the bag he’d dropped and scrambles out the door. He can’t do this. He needs to be somewhere else. Anywhere else. 

 

Taemin quietly lets himself into the apartment, unsure if Jinki was asleep or not. He should be, it was well after midnight after all. The lights are on in the kitchen, so Taemin heads towards it. Jinki’s back is to him, standing at the stove, as is whoever is sitting up at the island. They have a hood so he isn’t sure who it is. Taemin waits until Jinki isn’t holding something hot.

“Hey babe,” Taemin says. 

As expected, Jinki jumps in surprise. Their two dogs, Adam and Eve, scramble off of their beds and jump to greet Taemin. When Jinki realizes it’s Taemin, he opens his arm like he’s awaiting a hug. Taemin slides into his arms like he’s done many times before, and Taemin finally notices that the person sitting at the island is none other than Taehyung. 

“Taehyung! You’re here!” Taemin says.

“Is that okay?” Taehyung asks, looking down at his hands. 

“Of course it is.”

Taemin passes him the tea that Jinki had been preparing for him before patting Jinki’s hand to let him go. 

“You two continue your talk, I’m going to bed,” Taemin says. “And Taehyung, feel free to stay in the guest bedroom.”

Jinki sits down across from Taehyung and watches the way the younger boy wraps trembling fingers around the mug of tea. The door behind Taemin and their dogs closes with a soft click and Jinki sighs, “So do you wanna talk about why you’re really here?” 

Taehyung’s head jerks up, “I’m not here for any reason,” he denies immediately. 

Jinki raises a skeptical brow, “Taehyung, it’s two in the morning. You just confessed that you like Minho and ran off. You’re here for a reason.” 

Taehyung shakes his head, “It’s nothing. Just…” he tightens his grip on the mug, knuckles turning white from the force. He hesitates before the words come pouring out. “I just. I’m trying so  _ hard _ to get my shit together and it doesn’t seem to matter. Nothing I do is ever good enough for my dad and I can’t talk to my brother about this because he’s gone and after the fight we had at the funeral he won’t talk to me. And Minho didn’t say anything, and he’s straight. I don’t know why I thought I should tell him because now he’s disgusted with me. And today my dad was laying into me. He got mad because I smelled like pot when I came home and started yelling at me. He kept saying I was stupid and useless.” Tears roll down Taehyung’s cheeks but he doesn’t stop talking. “A-and I snapped at him. I fought with him. Told him that it wasn’t true. But he told me that it was and that mom never loved me and that Jinnie didn’t care about me. And I told him that he was wrong and he fucking hit me. He slapped me and shoved me and so I ran. I came here because I didn’t know where else to go and I’m sorry. I shouldn’t burden you with this. I’m sorry.”

Jinki sets his own mug down with a sharp clink. “He hit you?”

Taehyung’s mouth snaps shut. “I m-mean.” 

“Taehyung, it’s okay. You can tell me,” Jinki says softly because he’s  _ Jinki _ and he radiates comfort. 

His hands tremble as he cautiously pulls the hood he was wearing down. A forming bruise mars his cheek and he looks down at his mug. 

“First of all, Taehyung, he shouldn’t be hitting you. Second, you’re always welcome here. We can get you a spare key and everything. Taemin is right, we have that spare bedroom for a reason.”

Taehyung nods, “Just. D-don’t tell anyone. Please?” 

“I won’t. But you need to promise me that you’ll tell me if he does that again okay? Just so I know.”

Another quiet nod and Taehyung sips at his tea, wiping the tears streaking his cheeks. 

“I know that this is… an unusual question but, can I take a picture of your face? We need to document everything just in case it happens again.” 

Taehyung nods and Jinki pulls out his phone, opening the camera app and snapping a picture of the growing bruise on Taehyung’s cheek. “Thank you.” 

Taehyung finishes his tea quickly and puts the cup in the sink before making his way to the guest room. He hesitates in the doorway, looking over his shoulder to Jinki. “Thanks, hyung.” he murmurs before slipping inside the room and closing the door behind him. 

Jinki puts his own mug in the sink and tries to not freak out. He starts to clean the kitchen just to give his hands something to do. Taemin comes out of their bedroom and watches Jinki for a couple of minutes. 

“Babe, come on. Back to bed, now.” Taemin says.

“I can’t just-” Jinki says.

“Yes you can. We can talk about this tomorrow, after we’ve gotten some sleep.”

Taemin pulls Jinki back to their room where they have to push the dogs out of the way so they can actually climb into the bed. 

 

The minute the door closes behind Taehyung, Taemin spins to look at Jinki. Jinki studiously avoids Taemin’s gaze as he washes the mugs that had been used last night. Their dogs wander the kitchen in the hopes of dropped food and when they realize there is none, give up and head into the living room. 

“Babe,” Taemin says. 

Jinki continues to do the dishes like he didn’t hear Taemin speak. Taemin sighs and waits until Jinki turns from the sink, still avoiding his eyes.

“Babe,” Taemin repeats. 

Jinki sinks into his sweater, letting it cover his face.

“Yeah?” Jinki mutters.

“Are you gonna tell me what you and Taehyung were talking about last night?” Taemin asks.

Jinki shrinks deeper into his sweater.

“Jinki,” Taemin says.

“Jinki isn’t here. Leave a message,” Jinki says. 

Taemin comes around to hug Jinki and Jinki whines.

“He didn’t want me to tell anyone,” Jinki protests.

“You’re horrible at keeping secrets from me,” Taemin says. 

Jinki peeks out from his hiding place in his sweater. “I know, but- fine. Taehyung was here because his dad hit him and it left a mark and he didn’t know what to do and I don’t know what to do either and I’m supposed to be the adult and-”

“Whoa, whoa, whoa. Hey, it’s okay. You were there for him to talk to. That’s what’s important, right?” Taemin cuts in. 

“Right.”

“So there, stop worrying,” Taemin says. 

“I think we should tell someone.”

“Like who?”

“The police? Just maybe? Because I don’t think we can just handle this on our own.”

“Didn’t he say he didn’t want you to go to anyone?”

“Yes, but Taemin I think we should.”

“That’s not our decision.”

“Taehyung doesn’t want to go because he’s afraid-”

“Exactly. So we should respect his choice.”

“Taemin-”

“No. Jinki it’s not our choice.”

“We can help him.”

“Maybe he doesn’t want help!” the last words come out as more of a shout than he meant them to be, but he doesn’t back down. 

Jinki frowns. “We need to help him, you’re not seeing the situation clearly-”

“I think I can see it just fine. He doesn’t want us to go spreading that around, which is  _ his choice _ and we need to respect that.”

“You’re so blinded by your naivety!” 

Taemin snaps. All of his self control gets thrown out the window by his temper and he doesn’t remember what comes out of his mouth next, but he does know it’s biting and it leads to Jinki actually  _ shouting _ at him which had never happened ever. He responds with as much anger as Jinki has and they scream at each other. He shouts about how Jinki doesn’t  _ understand _ and Jinki retorts with something along the lines of  _ maybe _ he could understand if Taemin would stop being  _ selfish _ and shutting him out. 

They yell at each other about stupid things, things that he didn’t even think mattered that much to either of them but he’s so angry and Jinki won’t  _ listen _ so he had stormed out of the house. They were on a break. That echoes with Taemin even as he breaks into a run to get as far away from Jinki’s apartment as possible. A break. Not dating. For the first time in  _ years _ . What was he gonna do?

 

Taemin finds himself in church. The daily mass is long over, but there’s still people in here in the middle of the day praying and Taemin quietly slips into a pew. He stares up at the crucifix that hangs over the altar and remembers all the times he had come here with his family, before the accident, before the crash, before he was alone. He pulls the kneeler out and settles onto it, bowing his head and folding his hands. Should he pray for something? Forgiveness? Deliverance? To be struck down where he stood? He sighs quietly, trying not to disturb the others in the church. 

“Excuse me,” someone says.

Taemin’s head jerks up to look at the old woman who had spoken. She was standing in the aisle of the church, looking at him.

“Yes?” Taemin answers politely. 

“Do I know you?”

“I don’t think you do, ma’am.”

“No, you were in the children’s choir? Weren’t you?”

“I was.”

“That’s where I know you from.”

“I see,” Taemin says with a polite smile, still wondering why she had approached him in the first place. 

“It’s so nice to see young people like yourself still in the church.”

Guilt punches him in the chest. “Yes?”

She nods and wanders off and Taemin somehow manages to feel worse than he had before he had sat in this pew. He pulls out the psalm book just to give his hands something to do and opens it. 

“Repent therefore, and turn again, that your sins may be blotted out.” Acts 3:19. Oh perfect. He flips the pages again. “Judge not, and you will not be judged; condemn not, and you will not be condemned; forgive, and you will be forgiven” Luke 6:37. He closes the book with a displeased expression. Haha universe. Very funny. The catholic guilt was demanding that he set things right, after all he  _ had _ been partially responsible for the fight with Jinki. However, he was also stubborn. He wouldn’t go back and apologize so soon. 

When he leaves the church, his feet wander aimlessly around the blocks. Jinki didn’t want to see him. Not so soon after he had said all of those awful words to him. His phone is also strangely silent, but hey. He couldn’t really blame anyone. He wouldn’t want to talk to him either. How had they managed to put up with him for so long anyway?

 

Yoongi is nearly satisfied with his latest remix. Nearly. But seeing as how it was after two in the morning he decides to probably go to bed. 

“Hey,” the voice comes from behind him and Yoongi startles hard, nearly falling out of his chair. 

“What the fuck Taemin?” Yoongi hisses. “How the hell did you get into my apartment?”

“I have a key.”

“Did you pick the fucking locks?”

Taemin shrugs and hugs himself, not having a snippy comeback like he normally would. Yoongi’s anger evaporates as he notices Taemin’s cheeks are shiny and his eyes are puffy. 

“Holy shit have you been crying? What’s wrong?” Yoongi asks, getting up from his chair. 

“I just need a place to stay for the night,” Taemin says, scrubbing at his face.

“Um, okay? And you’re not at the loft because?”

“Jinki and I are on a break.”

“You are? Do you want to… talk about it or something? If not I have weed.”

“I don’t want to talk about it. Look, I’m sorry for bothering you this late, it’s just, your apartment was closest and I don’t-”

“Taemin it’s fine. You don’t have to explain yourself.”

“Okay.” His voice is small, broken. He sounds lost. “Thanks.”

“Look. Let’s just… smoke a bowl and put something on the tv and chill. Okay?”

“Okay,” Taemin says.

The show they pick to watch is the trashy tv that’s on at two in the morning. The smoke drifts around them lazily and Taemin relaxes against Yoongi. It’s nice to be high, to let his mind float away from everything that’s bothering him. 

“I hate this show,” Yoongi grumbles, trying to figure out how to work the remote again.

“I don’t even know what we’re watching anymore,” Taemin says.

He turns to look at Yoongi and realizes that their faces are far closer together than he thought. And for whatever reason he thinks that’s hilarious and starts to giggle. He hates it when he gets the giggles. He tries to stop himself from giggling. Be  _ serious _ brain. It’s hard to be serious. Why was he being serious? He can’t remember, must not have been important. What  _ is _ important is… he doesn’t know. Their faces are still close together and Taemin’s gaze drops to Yoongi’s mouth. Yoongi has a nice mouth. He isn’t sure who leans in first, but soon his hands are tangling in Yoongi’s hair just like old times. Yoongi pins him onto the couch and Taemin’s hands find their way to his hips. Was this a bad idea? Maybe. Did he care? Not really. The best way to get over someone was to get under someone and Yoongi was his best option right now. Better a friend than a stranger, right?

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> thanks for reading guys!
> 
> (just a heads up that the next chapter may take a bit both B and I (K) have coming up and might not have the time, energy, what not to write)
> 
> we love you
> 
> -K


	7. and these times are so hard, and it’s getting even harder

Pounding on the door causes Taemin to jerk out of his dream.

“What the fuck?” Yoongi groans from beneath him.

Oh fuck.  _ Fuck _ . He slept with Yoongi last night. Taemin slides to the side and Yoongi scrambles to put on underwear.

“Those are…” Taemin starts as Yoongi pulls on his underwear. “Whatever.”

Taemin leans against the arm of the couch as Yoongi makes his way to the door. He opens it to reveal Jeongguk. Jeongguk’s mouth drops open in shock as he takes in Yoongi’s state of undress, the hickeys that litter his neck, and Taemin sitting very obviously on the couch. 

“What the  _ fuck _ ,” Jeongguk says.

“Uh. I can explain?” Yoongi says weakly. 

Jeongguk’s voice is shrill, “Did Taemin-hyung  _ cheat _ on Jinki-hyung with  _ you _ ?” 

“No!” Taemin says, agast.

“Then how do you explain  _ this _ ?” 

“Well, we were getting there. Do you want to continue this inside my house? Where my neighbors can’t see my dick practically hanging out of these boxers?” Yoongi drawls.

“Do you honestly think I want to hear a word that comes out of your mouth right now?”

“Jeongguk, It’s not what it looks like.”

“Really? Because it looks like you guys had sex,” Jeongguk’s voice is scathing.

“Okay, then it’s exactly what it looks like,” Taemin pipes in. “But, there’s a bit more to the story.”

Yoongi’s voice is soft and pleading, “Please Jeongguk. I know it looks bad but give me a chance to explain.” 

Jeongguk wavers, then heads into the apartment. Taemin scrambles to pull on Yoongi’s underwear before Jeongguk can get a full look.

“How is this not cheating?” Jeongguk crosses his arms. 

“Because I’m on a break with Jinki,” Taemin says, waving a hand like it wasn’t that important.

“Okay, so it’s not cheating. But I was under the impression that you actually cared about me. I’ll see myself out.” Jeongguk says.

The door slams shut after Jeongguk. Yoongi stares blankly at the door, frozen. Taemin’s mouth is open in an expression of horror. Eventually Yoongi turns to look at Taemin and they both look equally horrified. 

“I think I’m going to go stew in my own self-loathing for awhile,” Yoongi says.

“I’m so sorry, if I wasn’t such a dumbass that wouldn’t have happened, and he would still-” Taemin starts.

“Stop. It’s fine. I should have realized. This one’s on me.” Yoongi says, his voice drips self loathing. 

“Excuse you, I’m the little slut who came all the way over here. If anything, I am the one to blame.”

Yoongi scowls, “Are we really going to fight over who gets to wear the toilet paper crown of I’m a piece of shit?”

“Really, it’s quite the competition. How about we agree to share that award?”

“Sounds good. I’m going to take a hit and take a nap.”

“Call me if it gets too bad.”

A choked, “Yeah,” before Yoongi goes back to his bedroom.

Taemin gathers his scattered clothes. He had really fucked up this time.

 

Minho lets out a slow breath as he pushes up the barbell again. He’s lost track of how many reps he’s done but it’s a lot. His chest burns but he can’t stop because if he stops he has to face his feelings. He’s been bench pressing for so long his spotter had to leave, but that’s okay because if he gets pinned he can get stew even more. 

A face pops into his field of vision, short hair pushed back by a head band and sweat rolling down the side of a face. 

“Minho? What the fuck are you doing without a spotter?” Amber situates herself to spot without being asked, glaring down at him. 

“Uuuh.” 

“Choi Minho are you running from your emotions.  _ Again _ ?” 

Minho scowls up at her, “Noooo.” 

“Put the bar on the rack.” Amber’s voice leaves no room for argument and when Minho doesn’t make a move to follow the order she grabs the bar herself and hauls it to the rack, holding it there. Minho scowls, sitting up and brushing sweaty bangs out of his eyes. 

“What do you want?” 

Amber snorts, “Rude much? I’m here to be the voice of reason you so clearly lack.” 

Minho purses his lips, “Oh wise voice of reason what did I miss this time?” 

“Well, for one. Where. Was. Your. Spotter?” She snaps her towel against his thigh with every word. 

Minho dances out of her range, “Ah ah ah. He had to go and I wasn’t done.” 

She squawks, “Choi Minho. You know better than that!” 

“Do I?”

She narrows her eyes, “Do I need to have a chat with Coach Kim?”

“Maybe I deserve to be kicked off the team.”

“Ooookay,” Amber sighs, “So clearly this is about feelings.” 

“Who said anything about feelings?”

“You did. In a round-a-bout ‘I’m a big tough guy who doesn’t have feelings’ sort of way.” 

“Hey!” 

“Am I wrong?” 

Minho sighs, “No… But I’m fine. It’s fine. He probably hates me.” 

“You can’t sweat out your feelings,” Amber yelps as Minho ducks back under the bar to try and lift some more. 

Minho grits his teeth, fighting against her holding the bar down, “I can damn well try.” 

“Absolutely not. We’re talking about it Minho.” 

He crosses his arms over his chest, “I don’t want to.” He pouts childishly. 

Amber’s patience is gone. She grabs him by his sweat soaked shirt (internally cringing) and hauls him up. Without so much as a word, she drags him out of the gym towards a cafe. Even as they walk, Minho is whining and grumbling and Amber snaps. “Are you five?” 

“If I was five I wouldn’t fucked up this bad.” 

“Oh my god. What did you even do that’s so bad?” She rounds on him. They’re not even in the cafe but whatever. This clearly needs to be addressed. 

“I got so fucking high that when my crush confessed that he liked me back I couldn’t even fucking respond. I was too high to even process it. And now he hates me, his friends hate me, and I hate me.” 

Amber sighs deeply, pinching the bridge of her nose between her thumb and forefinger. “He doesn’t hate you. He’s probably just heart broken. His friends are probably tired of watching you dance around him. Hell, I’m tired. Here. I’ll fix it for you. Gimme your phone.” 

Confused, Minho hands over his phone. Amber beams at him as she opens his messages. 

**to: kim taehyung**

_ hey can we talk?  _

_ (read) _

Minho makes a soft noise. “He definitely hates me.” 

Amber slaps his arm and he whines, “He does not. He might be busy. Give him a chance.” 

“Fine. But did you have to slap me so hard my arms hurt?” 

“That’s your own damn fault.” She grins, “Now c’mon let’s get smoothies.” 

 

Taemin goes to the dance studio when he’s upset. His instructor, bless her, had given him a key so he could get into the studio when he wanted. She understood that sometimes he just needed to be alone, work on perfecting his latest dance routine. He knew what this one would be, channeling all of his anger and frustration and sadness into the dance. Bo-ah had called it heartbreaking, and he supposed it was. He isn’t really feeling anything else, so it’s practically the only thing that gets channeled into his creative process. It’s nearly finished, he just has to perfect it and practice it and then he could hopefully use it in the dance performance that was coming up. 

He throws himself into the dance, losing himself in the music. It’s so much better than having to think, having to feel. He knows he’s running away from his problems, but he can’t bring himself to care. The door opens quietly and he pays no mind to it.

“You’re still here?” Jongin’s voice asks. 

Taemin pauses long enough to look back at him before turning back to his routine.

“What’s wrong this time?” Jongin asks.

Taemin isn’t sure whether to laugh because Jongin knows him so well or cry because the pain of the breakup was still so raw. 

“Jinki and I broke up,” Taemin says. 

He wants to believe that he says this nonchalantly, but he knows he doesn’t pull it off. Jongin falls into beat beside him, making up choreography as he dances beside Taemin. They’re still in sync, even with the different dances, and it reminds him of old times where they were just two dance students working in dingy studios hoping to sign on with a dance company. Not two adults who kept fucking up their lives and getting in trouble. Taemin in particular just couldn’t seem to keep his life together. The music stalls and Jongin pulls on his wrist.

“How long have you been here?” Jongin asks. 

Taemin shrugs and avoids his eyes. He didn’t know, didn’t care. He had work soon anyway, a timer on his phone set so he wouldn’t miss his shift and fuck up that aspect of his life as well. 

“Have you eaten?”

Another no. Taemin tries to pull out of his grip but Jongin has always been far stronger than he looked.

“You’re coming with me and we’re getting something to eat.”

Taemin doesn’t resist as Jongin pulls him out of the studio. He entwines his hand with Jongin’s and tries not to think. If he has to think, then he’ll have to feel, and he doesn’t want to feel a damn thing. Jongin makes him eat a meal, watching him closely to make sure Taemin isn’t just pushing around his food. His timer rings all too soon and he knows he has to go to work.

“Come over after?” Jongin asks.

Taemin nods.  

 

Jinki doesn’t quite know what to do with himself. So, instead of dealing with his feelings he deep cleans the house. It quite literally gets scrubbed from top to bottom but that isn’t enough to keep him occupied. So he reorganizes the bookshelf, and then color codes the closet. But that only serves to make him  _ more _ upset because _ his _ clothes are in there with  _ Taemin’s  _ clothes and he sits on the floor. Things are not getting better and all of his insecurities are flooding back to him. Maybe he wasn’t good enough for Taemin. How had he even managed to start a relationship? He was terrible at relationships. He doesn’t want to think about the things that Taemin must be doing, the  _ people _ Taemin must be doing. Now that they weren’t together Taemin had no reason to not sleep around. Jinki had just been holding him back, hadn’t he? There’s a soft whine and Jinki looks over to where Adam and Eve are hesitating in the doorway. 

“Come here,” he says softly, reaching out to them.

Taemin would come back, wouldn’t he? He’d come back. If not for Jinki, then for the dogs. And then Jinki could try and make things right again. It would have to work. He didn’t want to lose him. Eve curls up beside him and Adam goes to jump up on the bed instead. 

“Should we go to bed?” Jinki asks them. 

He puts Eve in the bed as well before flicking off the lights and pulling the covers over himself. He could definitely fall asleep. He wouldn’t just stare up at the ceiling all night. He looks over at the clock on the bedside table. Oh perfect, it’s 2am. He sighs as he rolls onto his side. If he could just- well, he doesn’t know what he would do. He knows that he’s still a bit sensitive about their fight, but he really doesn’t want to make anything worse. What if he made things worse? What if he never said anything? Wouldn’t it be worse to not say anything? He had to say something. They both would have to get everything off of their chests in order for them to repair their relationship. Right? Wasn’t that how it worked?

 

Taehyung looks down at his cracked screen, Minho’s text staring back up at him. He can’t bring himself to reply. There’s so much going on and while Minho hurt him, he doesn’t have the energy to fix it. Not right now. There’s a soft knock at his door and he locks his phone quickly, calling a soft “come in.” 

His dad stands there awkwardly, “I know things have been rough recently and I’m sorry. Work has been really stressful.” 

Taehyung nods, not really sure what to say. 

“I just wanted to say I’m sorry.” Seojun says. “Let me make it up to you. How about going out for dinner tonight?” 

Relief swells in Taehyung’s chest and he nods. “Sounds great, dad.” 

It starts out great. Dinner is nice, inexpensive but nice. His dad is joking with him like he used to before mom died and everything went to shit. But Taehyung can’t let go of the fear. He’s waiting for something to go wrong. For his dad to lose it and yell at him. He’s walking the line of crippling fear and dizzying happiness. Maybe he’s just being dramatic. Maybe things are gonna get better.

It all hits when he’s home alone in his room. He doesn’t know what to feel anymore and he doesn’t know if he trusts his dad the way he did before.  And there’s so much going on. Work and school and  _ Minho _ . It’s too much all at once and he buries his face in his pillows as he just struggles to breathe. 

The shrill ring of Seojun’s work phone startles him enough to catch his breath but it doesn’t matter when his dad starts yelling into the phone. His deep voice echoes around the house and Taehyung finds himself scrambling to cram himself into his closest. His heart is in his throat and he can’t breathe. His chest hurts and tears blur his vision. He can’t do this. He’s so confused. He doesn’t know what to do. 

 

He almost had it perfect, but it still  _ wasn’t good enough _ . There were still a couple of moves he couldn’t get quite how he wanted and he wasn’t going to leave the studio tonight until he had them perfect. Jongin had fallen asleep in the corner, but Taemin was determined to push through. He had to get this perfect. It had to be perfect. He had to be perfect. His limbs felt heavy and each new turn made him more exhausted, but he was determined to get this perfect. It  _ had to be. _

 

The door slams open and Jonghyun pauses mid lecture in annoyance. Key comes rushing through the doors with a wail and throws his arms around Jonghyun to sob into his chest. Jonghyun’s arms automatically encircle his waist to support him. He looks up at his class where most of them are staring or whispering. 

“We’ll end twenty minutes early. See you all on Thursday,” Jonghyun says. “Anyone who stays to stare will fail one of their papers.”

Jonghyun practically drags Key over to his desk and sits him in the chair as the students start to pack up and file out. 

“Key, baby, what’s wrong?” Jonghyun asks, fixing Key’s hair and digging out a box of tissues to pass to his boyfriend. 

“It’s Taemin,” Key says between sobs.

“What about him?” Jonghyun asks.

“He’s in the hospital.”

“What? Why?”

“Overexertion. The poor thing has been working himself half to death and I didn’t notice.”

“We barely see him.”

“I know. But I still should’ve noticed! And Taehyung! He’s the same way!”

Key launches himself out of the chair and into Taehyung’s arms as he approaches, completely ignoring Jimin and Jeongguk. 

“You have to come work for me, you have to. I can’t let you work those awful hours anymore,” Key half sobs. “Please come work for me.”

Taehyung freezes, “Um, what?” 

“Come work for me. Quit your job at that place.”

“Again, what?” Taehyung repeats, “I just heard my name and Taemin-hyung’s and then you kinda threw yourself at me and now I’m confused.” 

“I’m offering you a job that you can’t turn down.”

“Babe, that’s threatening,” Jonghyun interrupts.

“I need him to work for me! Then he doesn’t have to worry about that stupid restaurant!” Key says.

“Shouldn’t we go see Taemin?” Jonghyun reminds him.

“Right! We have to get over there!” Key says.

“Does Jinki know?” Jimin asks quietly.

 

Jongin doesn’t look like he knows what to do with himself when Jinki comes through the door. He subtly slips his hand out of Taemin’s as the pack of friends approach. His eyes flick over Taemin’s face before he scoots out of the way. Taemin steels himself for the interrogation that he knows they’re waiting to start. 

“So why are you here  _ this _ time?” Jinki asks. 

It’s a perfectly harmless sentence, but Taemin can feel the emotion behind it. 

“No reason. I’m fine.” Taemin says, gesturing to Jongin to pass him his clothes. 

He knows this won’t end well, especially when Jinki looks like he’s ready for a fight. He’s doing well until Jinki asks his what he had been up to. He doesn’t mean for it to slip, but it does. Taemin slowly pulls on his jacket, avoiding his friends’ gaze.

“You slept with  _ who _ ?” Jinki repeats.

“We. Were on. A break.” Taemin says through gritted teeth. “We’re  _ on _ a break. It doesn’t matter who I sleep with.”

“Right. It doesn’t matter that you fucked your way through your entire dance team and then some like a-” Jinki shuts his mouth before he finishes his sentence, looking away from Taemin’s angry gaze. 

“Like a  _ what _ ?” Taemin hisses. “Finish the sentence like you know you want to.”

“Like a  _ whore _ . Are you happy?” Jinki says.

Taemin’s jaw is locked. “Oh I’m just chipper.”

He sways as he gets to his feet, roughly pushing away any help that’s offered and storming out of the room with Jongin hot on his heels. Jinki sighs, running his hands through his hair. 

“I didn’t mean to do that,” he says quietly.

 

It’s a well known fact that Seokjin bakes when he’s stressed but Minho is not prepared for the literal mountain of cookies he is offered when he steps inside. 

“Uh. Thanks.” Minho says, nibbling on his cookie as he follows Jin into the kitchen. 

Seokjin hums, “Of course. So what did you want advice on hyung?” 

The kitchen is sweltering and Minho wonders how long Seokjin has been baking for as he asks, “Well. It’s about Taehyung. I figured since you’re brothers you’d know something.” 

A nervous chuckle bubbles from Seokjin’s lip, “I think you’re forgetting the whole we haven’t really talked in a year thing.” 

Even as he speaks, Seokjin is adding ingredients into a bowl to continue baking and whisking furiously. 

“I know but you would know him best right?” 

“Nope. Check with Jiminie.” Seokjin says, whisking faster. 

Minho snorts, “Jimin will rip my dick off.” 

“Well, there’s nothing I can do about it. 

“Jin!” 

“Look. I haven’t talked or interacted with my brother in several months. The only thing I can tell you is that you fucked up.” 

“I know…” Minho pouts. 

Pans clang as Seokjin slams them down to pour batter into. “Then. Why are you here? You know I can’t help.” 

Minho suddenly gets the feeling that Jin is going to bake him into a cake and feed it to Namjoon. He nods, “You’re right. I’m sorry. I will never let Hobi give me advice ever again. I’m just gonna go.” 

“Take some cookies!” Jin says, false cheer in his grin. 

The cookies are definitely poisoned and he’s going to die. “You got it.” 

At least if he dies, he’ll be eating bomb cookies and he won’t have to stress about this anymore.

 

Taemin is still unsure about it all. Jinki and him still hadn’t made any effort to make up and that hurt. It was like a gaping hole, something that wasn’t filled no matter how busy his day was. He cautiously makes his way into the loft, confident that everyone was out at the party. He could catch a couple of hours of sleep before going back to the dance studio to perfect his latest piece all while avoiding his friends. That makes him feel a bit guilty, but seeing them still felt weird now that they all knew Jinki and him were fighting. He finds one of the empty rooms and curls in under the blankets, praying for sleep to find him. 

Of course it doesn’t. It hasn’t for the past week and a half but ever since the hospital he had been eating better if only to keep himself standing. Truthfully, he was exhausted, but sleeping alone just felt too strange. It felt wrong to not have someone to wake up next to, but if he wanted to get back with Jinki he had to stop sleeping around. He buries his head underneath the covers and sighs. He just wanted some sleep. As he’s on the verge of drifting off, his phone buzzes loudly. Taemin curses under his breath and answers without looking. 

“What?” he snarls.

“Hey Taemin? Where are you? Were you sleeping?” Hobi’s familiar voice floats through the phone.

“Well I’m not sleeping  _ now _ , that’s for sure,” Taemin mutters. 

“Are you at the loft?”

“.....Maybe. Why?”

“Look, I  _ know _ you guys are fighting, but really you’re the only one that can control him and-”

“No.”

“Taemin, please. You have to. We’re already coming up to the door so you can’t run. Just… calm him down or something.”

“No. Fuck off.”

“Taemin come on. We’re already here.”

Taemin curses as he can hear the door being noisily slammed open. He reluctantly gets out of the bed and goes into the hall to wait for them. Minho and Hobi are supporting Jinki between them, stumbling under the weight and his missteps. Taemin frowns.

“He wouldn’t stop drinking. Seriously, you guys need to…”

Hobi trails off as Taemin gives him a nasty glare. “I actually don’t have to do anything, Hoseok.”

He clicks his tongue as he watches them struggle to hold him up. He still did have feelings for him, whether or not he liked it. He can’t just sit back and watch Jinki suffer, even if they had been avoiding each other. “Fine. Bring him into the bedroom.” Taemin leads the way to Jinki’s room, opening the door for them. 

They shoot him a grateful look as they dump Jinki on the bed and leave, off searching for their (hopeful) boyfriends. Taemin turns to look at his own ex-boyfriend. It still hurt to see him and know they hadn’t made up. Still, Taemin wasn’t cruel. Even if Jinki was stupid drunk Taemin would still take care of him. He manages to set Jinki into a sitting position and pulls off his jacket to toss to the side. Jinki gives a small grunt and weakly bats at his hands. Taemin gives a frustrated huff.

“Just hold still. You hate to sleep in jeans and we both know it.” Taemin says. 

He goes to unbutton the jeans and Jinki slaps his hands away. “No.”

“Jinki-”

“I have a boyfriend.”

“Do you?” the words come out with more bitterness than he intends. 

“Yes! He doesn’t like me right now because-” the end of the sentence is lost as Jinki dissolves into tears. 

Taemin’s heart lurches and he gently wipes away Jinki’s tears with his sleeve.

“No,” Jinki mumbles, trying to move away. “I want Taemin.”

“Jinki, look at me,” Taemin says softly. 

It takes him a couple of minutes but Jinki finally manages to focus his eyes on Taemin.

“You’re here!” Jinki gasps, pulling Taemin into a sloppy hug. “I thought you were never coming back because you hated me.”

“I don’t hate you.”

Taemin pulls away from him and helps him out of his jeans. Then he helps Jinki get under the covers and pulls them over him. Jinki reaches out to clumsily grab his arm as he pulls away.

“Stay?”

Taemin can feel his willpower crumbling as Jinki looks up at him with wide eyes. It doesn’t last long and Jinki passes out blissfully. “Okay.” Taemin says quietly. 

 

Jinki has some regrets in his life. One of those happens to be his current hangover. The headache pounds behind his eyes and he thanks god for the fact his room has blackout curtains. Wait. How did he get to his room? The last thing he can remember was walking  _ into _ the bar with Hoseok and Minho, intent on getting plastered. Shit. Obviously his plan succeeded, but seeing as how he couldn’t remember most of it he didn’t think it was all that much of a victory. What if he had done something stupid or said something embarrassing? He would have to apologize to them this morning. The door opens quietly and Jinki squints against the sudden light. 

“Oh, you’re up,” someone murmurs. 

Jinki tries to make out their face when they close the door and plunge the room back into darkness. 

“Do you want an aspirin?” they ask.

“God yes,” Jinki says. He feels like his mouth is stuffed with cotton.

They sit beside him and place the small tablets in his hand. “Water.”

Jinki greedily drinks as much water as he can before realizing it’s a bad idea. He lurches to the bathroom and barely makes it to the toilet in time. He throws up twice before his stomach finally calms down. He leans his head against the cool porcelain and the lights are turned on, making him groan again and shut his eyes.

“You okay?”

“No,” Jinki groans.

Hands hesitantly wind into his hair, pulling his bangs back and pinning them down. 

“Thanks,” Jinki says.

“Of course.”

Jinki braves opening his eyes against the light, ignoring the increasing headache in favor of trying to look at the person. It’s Taemin, and he’s looking down at him with a neutral expression that he’s so good at.

“I’m sorry,” Jinki says. It’s the only thing he can say. He’s been avoiding him for a week, trying not to pick another fight and yet here he was. Taking care of his hungover ass. Why would he even bother? “You don’t have to stay here.”

Taemin sighs and sets the glass of water on the counter. “Yes I do.”

“You don’t. Really, I can take care of myself.”

“I’m sure you can, but I’ll stay with you anyway.”

“Why?”

“Because for some reason I still care about you.”

Jinki laughs. “I don’t know why you would.”

“Maybe because we both know our fight was stupid?” Taemin suggests, staring down at his feet. 

“Will you forgive me?” Jinki blurts out.

That startles a laugh out of Taemin. “Only if you forgive me.”

“Run away with me?”

“Always.”

Jinki laughs. “I feel like shit.”

“You don’t look much better.”

“Thanks. You always know what to say.”

Taemin wrinkles his nose. “No offense, but you should shower.”

“And we’re gonna talk? After?”

“Yeah.”

 

His father’s grip on his upper arm is tight and it hurts as he drags him out of the station, head down. He’d been stupid. He got caught tagging and now his father is angry. Fear thrums in his veins as Seojun shoves him towards the car. The ride home is tense and silent, and Taehyung tries to keep calm. He can run for his room and call Jinki and slip out the fire escape.

A couple weeks ago he and Jinki had devised a simple system for checking in. Green was good. Yellow was he was okay but needed a place to stay. Red was I’m hurt or I’m in trouble and need help. He’d never needed to use red and he hoped to keep it that way as he pulled his phone out, careful to keep it out of Seojun’s sight. 

**To: dubu hyung**

_ yellow  _

_ gonna go to your house _

_ are u home? _

Taehyung hides his phone as Seojun leads the way into their house, heart pounding in fear. The click of the door shutting behind him is final and cold and then Taehyung is pushed against the door with a hand around his throat. 

“What the hell was that?  _ Tagging _ . You piece of shit.” His father’s breath is rancid, fanning across his face as he squirms. 

He doesn’t have an answer and he can barely breath from the surging panic and the hand cutting off his air flow. 

“‘M sorry. Dad please.” 

Seojun tosses him aside, locking the door and fresh fear races through his veins. Taehyung scrambles for the stairs only to be shoved, landing with a grunt on the staircase. His cheek makes contact with the steps and fuck it hurts. It throbs in time with his heartbeat as his father hauls him to his feet, punching him in the gut. He doubles over wheezing. 

“You’re a fucking disgrace. Always mocking me and making me look bad at work. After everything I do for you and this is how you repay me? Getting hauled in for fucking  _ tagging _ .” 

He’s pushed into the wall, head cracking sharply on the corner. He groans, sliding down and curling onto his side. Seojun scoffs and  _ stomps _ on his side and something cracks and Taehyung sobs. 

“I’m sorry. I’m sorry. I’m sorry.” 

Another stomp, another whimper. He has to get out. He can’t do this. It hurts. It hurts so much. He shoves his father, wrapping an arm around his side and scrambling up the stairs but he doesn’t make it far before his father is coming after him. He picks up speed, diving into the safety of his room and locking the door in his father’s face. It’s not enough and he pushes his desk in front of the door, flinching with every bang of Seojun’s fists against the wood.

He grabs his bag, the one he’d packed just in case, and slips out the window and down the fire escape. As the adrenaline fades the pain grows and he can feel sticky tears drying on his cheeks. He doesn’t know what to do. So he makes his way towards Jinki’s apartment, pulling out his phone. 

**To: dubu hyung**

_ red _

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> finals kicked us in the throat


	8. pretending to be innocent

The ping of Jinki’s phone going off interrupts the conversation. He glances down at it, just to see if it’s important. His heart drops when he sees Taehyung’s contact with a simple three letter word under it. 

“What’s wrong?” Taemin asks, noticing the shift in Jinki’s mood immediately. 

“We have to get home,” Jinki says.

“What? Why?” 

Jinki shows him the phone screen and Taemin frowns. 

“We can take the silver line, it’s the fastest,” Taemin says.

“Are we okay?” Jinki asks.

Taemin sighs, “Honestly? I don’t know yet. But Taehyung needs us, let’s go.”

Jinki nods, expecting that answer. They would need time to talk everything out. Time that they never seemed to have. 

 

The apartment is dark as they come in. 

“Taehyung?” Taemin calls softly. 

There’s a small, “Hyung?” from what seems to be the couch. 

Taemin makes his way towards the couch. “What’s going on?”

A helpless, pained sound as Taehyung shifts before he speaks. “He caught me tagging.” 

“Are you hurt?” Jinki asks.

“Yes,” it’s barely more than a whisper. 

“Will you let me look at it?” Taemin asks.

Even though the light is dim, the pair can see Taehyung’s hesitant nod. 

“We need to turn on the lights is that okay?” 

Another nod and Jinki flips the switch. As light bathes the room Taehyung features are visible. Forming bruises around his throat and blood streaking his cheek are the first things Taemin notices. He gently reaches out to ghost his fingers over the bruises, turning Taehyung’s head gently so he can see the extent.

“Anywhere else, Taehyung?” Taemin asks. “Jinki grab my kit. Bottom shelf in the closet.”

As Jinki leaves the room, Taehyung nods. “Ribs.”

“Do you think any of them are broken?”

Tear well in Taehyung eyes, “I don’t know. I don’t know.” He’s close to hysterics. “I just. They hurt. What did I do wrong?”  

“You didn’t do anything wrong,” Taemin says firmly. “This is not your fault.”

Jinki returns with the kit and Taemin unzips it, already knowing what he would need. 

“But if I didn’t make him angry, he wouldn’t do this. It’s my fault.” 

“Baby no, this is not your fault,” Jinki says, kneeling in front of him. 

“You don’t know that,” Taehyung shakes his head. “You don’t know. We were doing so well and then I fucked it up. It’s my fault.” His breathing is ragged and thick with tears. 

“It’s not your fault,” Jinki repeats.

“Taehyung, I need to check for a concussion,” Taemin says.

The younger nods slowly, “Okay.” he lowers his hands, wiping away the tears on his cheeks before turning to face Taemin. 

“Okay, what’s your full name?” 

“Kim Taehyung,” the response is a little slow. 

“Date of birth?”

“December 30th.” 

“How old are you?”

Taehyung pauses, brows furrowed. “T… Twenty one?” 

Taemin takes out a small flashlight to check pupil dilation. “Can you tell me everything that happened?”

He nods, “I was tagging. My spotter didn’t tell me that the cops were coming, he just bolted. So, I get hauled in and my dad is on duty. He sweet talks his way out of my getting charged and then we drive home. I texted Jinki-hyung in the car because I knew it wasn’t going to be good when I got home. Once we’re inside h-he,” Taehyung hesitates. “He threw me against the stairs. The wall too I think. When I fell over he kicked me a couple of times and then I… ran.” 

Taemin nods along to the story, in full professional mode. “Well, I think you only have a minor concussion. Now let’s check your ribs.”

Taehyung nods, going to lift his shirt without being prompted, hissing as he pulls it over his head and tossing it aside. Taemin pokes and prods at his ribs and Taehyung hisses in pain.

“They’re just cracked. It’ll take a month and a half for them to heal but that’s about all I can do besides tell you to take pain killers.”

He just nods, “Okay.” He sways forward to rest his head on Jinki’s shoulder with a soft noise of pain but doesn’t move. “I’m sorry,” he slurs. 

Taemin digs through his bag again and pulls out a syringe, filling it with something. He flicks the syringe and smiles over at the two. 

“Taemin what is that?” Jinki says.

“Pain meds,” Taemin responds.

Taehyung whines and curls away. “Do I have to?”

“Do you want the pain to stop?”

There’s a beat before Taehyung relents, “Yes.” 

Taemin preps Taehyung’s arm for the injection. “It’s not very strong but it’ll do for now.”

“‘Kay,” Taehyung winces as the needle slides into his skin but sighs when it’s done, melting into Jinki. He lets out a shuddering breath against Jinki’s neck  and closes his eyes. “‘M sleepy.” 

“That’s okay. Let’s get you to a bed.” 

 

After they tuck Taehyung into the guest bedroom, they return to the living room. Taemin tucks himself into one of the armchairs and Jinki sits on the couch. 

“So, do we resume our conversation?” Taemin asks. 

“We have some time now,” Jinki says.

Taemin pulls his knees closer to his chest. “So…”

“So.”

“We need to talk about what happened.”

“So let’s talk.”

Taemin bites at his lip and doesn’t meet Jinki’s gaze. “Let’s talk,” he repeats softly.

“I’m- sorry. For the things that I said.”

“But you meant them, at least in the moment you did.” Taemin sighs. “I’m sorry too. We both said things that... “

“We both said things that we knew would hurt.”

Taemin looks over at Jinki sadly. “Did you mean the things you said? Every one of them?”

“Did you?”

Taemin sighs and Jinki looks away.

“I’m sorry about what I said though,” Taemin says.

Jinki nods and Taemin can feel himself getting frustrated. They don’t seem to be making any progress. Jinki is avoiding his gaze and he really doesn’t want to lose his temper again. 

“I didn’t sleep with the entire dance team,” Taemin says. He doesn’t look at Jinki when he says this. He doesn’t want to see the reaction. 

“What?” Jinki asks.

“I only slept with two people while we were on a break.”

“Just two?” Disbelief colors his voice.

“Just two. I want you to believe me.” Taemin braves a glance over at Jinki. “I never cheated on you, I would never cheat on you. I know how important it is to you. And yeah, I might’ve gotten close but I told you about it.” Taemin realizes that he’s babbling but he can’t stop himself. “And I know that you probably don’t believe me when I say this and I can’t really blame you-”

“Taemin,” Jinki’s soft voice cuts him off. “I believe you.”

He shifts so he faces Taemin and Taemin hesitantly unwraps his hands from around his knees so he can put his feet on the ground and face him. 

“I didn’t- when I said those things I was angry. And I didn’t mean them. Really. I don’t think that you’re- You really mean the world to me. You do. And I said some really stupid things, and then I kept saying stupid things and I didn’t mean them I just-” Jinki buries his face in his hands. It was his fault this fight had started in the first place and it would be his fault that Taemin would have to remember the awful things he had said to him. 

There’s a soft touch on his shoulder and Jinki looks up as Taemin joins him on the couch.

“We’re not perfect, and yeah the things you said hurt. But, it’s okay. I think we both said things that, well, we needed to say.” Taemin says, awkwardly pulling back his hand. He rubs at the back of his neck. “It’s been three years without a fight, this was bound to happen sometime.”

“Can I take you out? On a date? Try all this again?” Jinki asks.

“I’d like that,” Taemin smiles. 

 

The bruises are darker in the morning and Taehyung stares at them in the mirror, gently running a finger over the obvious handprint around his neck. The scrape on his cheekbone is surrounded by irritation and he looks like he got in a fight. Maybe that’s what he should say. But that will make the other boys want blood. Maybe a simple ‘I just tripped into a wall’ will suffice. He doesn’t know what lie to say but he does know that he’s going to be seeing his friends before the obvious marks are healed. 

Making his way out of the bedroom, Taehyung keeps his hand pressed to his side and searches through the bathroom for some sort of pain medication.

“Bottom drawer on the right,” Taemin says from behind him. 

Taehyung startles violently, ducking his head and raising an arm defensively, all while keeping his other arm firmly wrapped around himself. 

“Shit sorry.”

He waves the apology off and opens the drawer, willing his heart to stop racing. He fumbles with the bottle for a moment before he manages to dump out the proper number of pills into his palm. Wordlessly, Taemin hands him a glass of water and he smiles thankfully, knocking back the medication. Together he and Taemin walk into the kitchen where Jinki has three mugs of tea ready. 

“Thank you,” Taehyung murmurs, wrapping his hands around the mug but not drinking just yet. 

Jinki smiles, “Of course,” he gently smoothes Taehyung’s hair out of his eyes and kisses the top of his head. 

Lingering by the door, Taemin watches the scene awkwardly unsure of how to act around his ex(?)boyfriend. Taehyung keeps his eyes down until his drink is finished. The air is filled with tension and he has regrets of even deciding to get out of bed. He just wants to get out of here, go to the loft and take a very very long nap. Fuck everything else. 

“I’m gonna head out to the loft but is there a turtleneck I can borrow?” 

“Just go through the closet and pick something out,” Jinki waves a hand, studiously avoiding Taemin’s gaze. 

Taehyung nods a few times before scurrying out of the room. The sweater he picks out is big on his skinny frame and he pulls the neck up to his chin. It’s warm and smells faintly of the woodsy cologne that Jinki wears. It’s oddly comforting and Taehyung sighs before gathering his things and heading for the door. 

He waves an awkward goodbye to the two men who are still on opposite sides of the room and shakes his head. “Thanks for… well. Thank you,” he mumbles before quickly escaping into the chilly autumn air. 

 

The loft is blessedly empty when Taehyung walks in. The quiet hum of appliances is better than the thousands of questions he’d have to deal with if anyone was in. He settles down on one of the couches and throws an arm over his eyes. The lights are off but even the dull sunlight from the windows is making his head throb. It’s pathetic but he wants to cry because of it. Everything hurts. Hell, even breathing hurts and the painkillers he downed don’t seem to be helping. 

Jingling keys make Taehyung’s eyes fly open. He pulls himself up, staring at the door. It inches open and Minho steps in, flicking on the light. A pained noise escapes his lips and he throws his hands up over his eyes. 

“Oh my god. Are you hungover?” Minho asks, turning off the light just as quickly.  

A slow “Yes,” and Taehyung lowers his hands. 

“Shit, sorry.” Minho steps further into the room, setting down his gym bag. 

Taehyung goes to say something back when Minho is suddenly in his face, “What the hell happened to you?”

“Uh. A fight?” The words sound unsure.

“Who are we hunting down.” Minho’s eyes bore into his. 

“N-no one.” Taehyung says. He’s trying to think of some lie that he can tell but Minho is brushing his fingers over the bruising on his cheek and he can’t think beyond the gentle touch. 

“Taehyung, who did this do you?” 

Think, think, think. “Taemin already took care of it.” 

Minho frowns. “He did?”

Taehyung nods. “Y-yeah. He patched me up too.” 

Minho hums, “You okay?” 

“I’m fine.” 

The tone make Minho’s brows raise. He sits down next to Taehyung, “If you say so…” 

“I don’t really want to talk about it,” he whispers. 

Immediately, Minho drops it. “Would you want to talk about something else?”

The air is awkward now that the Minho has been appeased and all Taehyung can think of is the smell of weed in the air and Minho’s lingering silence. 

“What do you want to talk about?” he almost doesn’t want to ask. 

“Maybe the other night.” 

Oh. That one night. “Sure. Say what you need to say.” 

Don’t say a damn word. He doesn’t want to hear how Minho doesn’t like him like that. But it’s okay because they can still be friends. Minho clears his throat, and god his eyes. They’re so intense and Taehyung can’t meet them. He looks down at his hands, but he can still feel the weight of them on him. 

“That night… I left you hanging and I.” Minho swallows, “You confessed and I didn’t say anything back.”

“It’s okay Minho-hyung. I get it.” 

“I was high out of my mind. And I couldn’t say what I should have.” 

Please don’t say it.

“Taehyung. Please look at me?” 

Hell no. Do not make eye contact, do not say anything, do not pass go. He shakes his head. 

“I’d really like it if you’d look me in the eye when I confess that I like you back.” 

Taehyung jerks his eyes up, “What?” 

“Kim Taehyung,” Minho gently cups his chin. “I like you. And if you’d let me I’d like to properly date you.” 

He can’t think. This can’t be real. “I… Yes?” 

A giant grin spreads across Minho’s face and he pulls Taehyung into a hug. Taehyung can’t help the pained wheeze he lets out but when Minho moves to let him go, he clings a little harder. Minho laughs and when he finally pulls away they settle into comfortable silence. After a moment Minho turns the TV on low and Taehyung lays down in his lap. Absently, Minho cards his fingers through Taehyung’s hair. It only takes fifteen minutes before Taehyung is asleep and Minho can’t help the small, fond smile from forming on his lips. 

 

Taemin reminds himself to absolutely not go overboard for this date. It was just a date. With Jinki. They had been on plenty of dates these past three years. This one was just different because they happened to be potentially getting back together. No big deal. It’s not a big deal. Not a big deal. It’s a big deal. They’re going to dinner and then a club for dancing as kind of a throwback to one of their first dates. Taemin was excited. And nervous. What if he messed up? He combs through his hair with his fingers again. Okay. He was ready. Totally. Totally ready.

“You ready?” Jinki asks from behind him. 

Taemin’s shoulders jump in surprise and he turns to face Jinki with a nervous smile. 

“Yeah,” Taemin says. 

Jinki is in leather pants and that’s  _ seriously _ unfair. His top is loose on him and  _ oh god _ it’ll be a time. He cannot put his hands on him because that would be inappropriate when he’s not quite sure where they stand. He will not touch the thighs. He wants to touch the thighs. Oh no. 

 

The restaurant is fine, he doesn’t really touch the food. Jinki is way more focused on how  _ good _ Taemin looks. The leather pants he’s wearing are some of Jinki’s favorites. And the shirt is not a shirt really. It’s nearly falling off of him and Jinki doesn’t know how to deal with that. When they get to the club, the line is thankfully not long and they get in quickly. 

“Should we get something to drink?” Taemin asks, looking back at him.

Jinki nods and Taemin gently takes his hand before pulling him towards the bar. This is okay. This is fine. Taemin leans against the bar, flagging down the bartender to order. Jinki most definitely does not like the way the bartender is flirting with Taemin, discounts be damned. Jinki’s hands find his way around Taemin’s hips in a not so subtle possessive gesture. Taemin leans back into him and Jinki tries to focus on something else.

“Jealous are we?” Taemin says teasingly, tipping his head back on Jinki’s shoulder. 

“Maybe,” Jinki grumbles. 

Taemin laughs as he grabs the shots for them.

“Bottoms up babe,” Taemin says cheerily.

Jinki thinks it’s three shots, maybe four, before Taemin is pulling him out on the dance floor. He feels melty. The music is loud and the dance floor is crowded, more people must have showed up while they were at the bar. Taemin is doing his thing, easily finding the rhythm in the music and acting like the alcohol doesn’t affect him. His hips are rolling with the rhythm and Jinki can tell people are looking at him. Jinki doesn’t  _ want _ other people looking at him. He pulls Taemin closer and Taemin easily melts into his arms with a smile. His arms circle Jinki’s neck and he pulls Jinki closer. Taemin guides them through another song, hips tight against each other. Taemin drops and drags his hands slowly up the edges of Jinki’s legs. His mouth ghosts against Jinki’s and he doesn’t know what to do anymore. Taemin smiles.

“Remember our first date here?” Taemin asks.

“I remember you,” Jinki says.

Taemin laughs and Jinki kisses him. Taemin’s hands come up to tangle in his hair and Jinki’s wander over Taemin’s body.

“Let’s get out of here,” Taemin says and Jinki couldn’t agree more.

Taehyung is lying on the couch with a joint between his fingers and his head in Minho’s lap. The party downstairs is raging but he absolutely wants nothing more than the thumping music muffled by the walls and the joint in his lazy grip. He offers the joint to Minho who shakes his head. He’s already smoked a bowl and had a couple of shots, so Taehyung understands. 

“Thank god midterms are over,” he grumbles and Minho hums. 

There’s stomping up the stair and the door is flung open by a red faced Jimin who’s so angry he looks like he’s ready to cry. 

“Fuck off, Hoseok. I don’t want to talk to you.” 

“Jimin, please I’m sorry.” Hoseok pleads. 

Jimin whirls around. “No! I don’t want to. God I’m so drunk. Why would you think this was a good idea? I hope I don’t even remember this when I wake up. I hope I don’t even remember your stupid face!” 

Ignoring Hoseok, Jimin staggers into the kitchen slurring for more vodka. 

“Shit. I’m gonna go take care of him,” Taehyung says rolling out of Minho’s lap.

Minho nods his understanding and Taehyung smiles before he follows Jimin, grabbing the bottle from Jimin’s hands as he starts to sob.

“Hey, Chimchim. Let’s go lie down for a little bit okay?” Taehyung pulls him into a hug and waddles his way down the hall into his room. Jimin’s sobs are wet and snotty pressed against his shoulder and Taehyung gently situates them so their laying down. 

“He’s stupid. I h-hate him.” 

Taehyung hums, rubbing Jimin’s back as he mumbles out “I know. It’s okay.”

“I wanna go punch his stupid face and break his pretty nose.” 

“In the morning okay?” 

Jimin pouts but nods along, burying his face in Taehyung’s chest and squeezing. He stifles the whimper from his still healing ribs being pressed against and kisses the top of Jimin’s head. His tears are slowing and Jimin keeps mumbling about how Hoseok is so pretty but stupid and how he hates him but wants to kiss his stupid face. Taehyung doesn’t do much other than agree and tell him that it’s okay until finally Jimin nods off drooling into Taehyung’s shirt. 

Carefully, Taehyung extracts himself and goes back out to the party. Hoseok is nowhere to be seen and honestly Taehyung glad because he’s kind of pissed at him. He has no idea what happened between him and Jimin but if Jimin is  _ that _ upset, Taehyung is upset. He folds himself into the couch next to Minho who hasn’t moved except to light a new joint. 

Jonghyun comes crashing into the room, clutching a wine bottle in one hand and grinning widely. 

“Happy midterms bitches! I just finished grading those damn papers!” Jonghyun shouts. 

“Oh god there goes my grade,” Taehyung mumbles.

Jonghyun waves the wine bottle in his general direction as Key comes up the stairs behind him. 

“We’re going to bed, babe,” Key says, pulling on his boyfriend’s hip to get him to move. 

“I don’t want bed I want to party!” Jonghyun says.

“You’re drunk. We’re going to bed.”

“We?”

“We.”

“Okay.”

Taehyung wrinkles his nose and sits back down in Minho’s lap, stealing the joint from him and taking a deep drag. They’re deep in conversation when the door flies open again. Taemin and Jinki are locked in a kiss and clothes are already almost off. Taemin breaks the kiss with a giggle and his hands are going for Jinki’s pants. Taehyung freezes, eyes widening. Minho gives an obvious cough and both of them look over to where Taehyung and Minho are staring at them. 

“Oh my god!” Taemin laughs, pulling Jinki’s shirt closed again.

“You’re here!” Jinki says. He doesn’t let go of Taemin, instead pulls him closer. “We’ll go to the, uh, yeah.”

Taemin beams at Taehyung as he’s pulled back to the bedrooms. 


	9. sit back, relapse, just sit back and relapse again

Taemin pushes his way into the room balancing two coffees in one hand and texting someone with the phone in the other. The people in the room take no notice of him and he patiently waits on the side of the room for the people to finish the photoshoot. Taemin stuffs his phone in his pocket in order to grab the precariously balanced coffee cup on the top before it can fall and spill. The director of the shoot calls for a break and Taemin trots over to where Jinki is climbing off of the boxes and taking a seat in one of the chairs lining the shooting stage. Taemin passes the coffee to him as Jinki kisses his cheek.

“You’re the best,” Jinki says.

“I know,” Taemin says.

The director nods at him and Taemin extends the other coffee cup with a smile. The director takes it with a grateful look before turning away to answer his phone. 

“These photos are going in a magazine this time,” Jinki says.

“Which one?” Taemin asks.

“I don’t remember.”

“Key could find them this time.”

“Won’t that be fun.”

Taemin rolls his eyes. “You know he’s gonna throw a tantrum.”

“Like I said, fun.”

“I guess.”

Jinki pulls at Taemin’s belt loops, gently rocking him back and forth.

“What’s wrong?” Jinki asks. 

Taemin shrugs and twists the everpresent rings around his fingers.

“Taeminnie,” Jinki sings, looping his arms around Taemin’s waist and pulling him closer. 

Taemin fights against his smile as he tries to dodge looking Jinki in the eyes. When he finally caves he can’t help but laugh at Jinki’s pleased expression. 

“Come on, tell me,” Jinki says. “You made sure that I couldn’t wear shorts today, so you should at least tell me what you’re thinking of.”

Taemin laughs, tracing a pattern on Jinki’s thighs. “You know you love it.”

Jinki laces their fingers together and Taemin’s free hand ghosts over Jinki’s mouth, careful not to mess up any of the makeup.

“I’m worried,” Taemin says.

“About?” Jinki asks.

Taemin’s face twists into a frown. Jinki pokes him in the side and Taemin’s face softens. 

“I’m worried about Jimin. And Taehyung. And Jeongguk.”

“Why?”

“They just - you’ve seen the way Kookie looks after Yoongi. And Yoongi acts clueless even though he really isn’t. And Jimin, going after Hobi? I spend a lot of time with both of them and I just - not to mention  _ Taehyung _ with  _ Minho _ and - I can’t - I don’t -” Taemin snaps his mouth shut as frustration takes over his features. 

“So you’re worried that someone will get hurt,” Jinki says. 

“Of course I am. Taehyung has enough to deal with right now without Minho and his drama.”

Jinki only smiles reassuringly up at Taemin.

“We can’t protect the kids from everything,” Jinki says.

“I can try.”

“I know. We’ll be there for them. That’s the best thing we can do for them.”

“I’m not good at comforting people.”

“Yes you are. You just don’t see it.”

Taemin shakes his head and goes to pull away from Jinki.

“You need to get back to your shoot,” Taemin says.

“I love you,” Jinki smiles.

“I love you too.”

 

The shoot is wrapping up and Taehyung is so tired. He’s been on set since five in the morning and his day is nowhere near done. He’s glad the bruises are light enough to cover now. His ribs are still giving him issues but at least the bruises are easily covered with makeup so he’s not missing  _ more _ work. Finally the photographer seems happy with the results and calls it to an end. Taehyung thanks everyone before darting off to go change. He has a shift at Denny’s that he needs to get to and heaven forbid anyone find out. They’d riot. They’d say he was working too hard. But it’s not about working or the money. He just can’t be home. Not after what happened. The less he’s home the less likely it is for him and Seojun to pass paths. 

He waves off everyone asking to hang out after the photoshoot citing homework as his excuse. Once he gets to Denny’s he steps into the back to change into his uniform. The smell of food is nauseating and Taehyung idly wonders when he last ate. He nibbled on the snacks at the photoshoot, missed ( skipped ) breakfast, and lunch should have been an hour ago but the thought of eating anything makes his stomach roll. Maybe later. 

Shoving that worry to the back burner of his mind, Taehyung plasters on a fake smile and starts his shift. It’s mechanical at this point and he doesn’t think beyond the aching of his feet. It’s a solid eight hours of waiting on people but as he nears the end of his shift he has more energy than he knows what to do with. His anxiety peaks as he clocks out. 

Going home still isn’t ideal so he ducks out back to light a cigarette. The nicotine burns his lungs but it’s a soothing burn. He’s got to figure out where he’s going after this. Maybe the loft? Minho mentioned something about wanting to hang out. Okay. He’s going to go to the loft and see his boyfriend and then, maybe then he’ll go home. Or he can sleep at the loft. As his cigarette burns down he looks at the stump. He should just stamp it out against the wall. He should. But he doesn’t. He presses the cherry of the cigarette against the skin of his hip, out of sight and all the jazz. The burn causes Taehyung’s jaw to tense and let out a soft hiss, but the pain is grounding. The anxiety is still thrumming in his veins but it’s no longer threatening to choke him. He can do this. He’s gonna go cuddle with his boyfriend and everything will be okay. 

 

The studio is well lit and spotless. It’s almost intimidatingly clean, and their small group is ushered into the lobby quickly. 

“Welcome to Phantom Studios. We’re very excited to have you here and hope this will encourage you to try out once you’re done with your schooling.” the woman says with a polite smile. “You will be meeting with some of our best dancers today and they’ll be taking you through their normal schedule.”

She leads the group to the first studio and opens the door to reveal eight people all dressed similarly milling around the studio. They turn as the students are pushed inside and the doors closed behind them. 

“Welcome, welcome! Go ahead and throw your bags to the side and we’ll start with warm ups.” one of the older members says. “My name is Hakyeon if you have any questions.”

Jimin is standing stiffly, pointedly looking away from Hoseok. He just wants to talk to Jimin, damn it. How were things supposed to get better if Jimin wouldn’t even look at him, let alone talk to him? 

“Jiminnie!” Taemin calls, coming out of seemingly nowhere to wrap his arms around Jimin’s shoulders.  

Jimin supports Taemin’s surprise weight easily. “Hey hyung.”

“Come warm up with me and Nini.”

Jimin smiles, “Okay.”

Jongin fixes Hoseok with a glare before he turns to greet the returning duo. Great. The entire dance team probably knew that he had been an idiot. 

“Jeongguk, right?” one of the older girls asks. 

“Yes!” he replies stiffly, eyes going wide. 

“Warm up with me?”

“Yes!”

She laughs at his terrified expression and pulls him into a warm up routine.

“Well well well, you must be Hoseok.” a pretty brunette says. 

“I am,” Hoseok says. 

“Lucky you, you get to warm up with me.” she says. “I’m Bora.”

“Nice to meet you.”

“So why exactly is Jimin mad at you?”

“Oh no, I’m not gonna spread more gossip.”

“It’s a dance class.” Bora says flatly. “What else is there to do?”

“So let’s talk about yours. Girlfriend I’m guessing?”

She laughs. “Oh no, if I’m gonna share you have to give me something.”

“I’m sure you all already know everything.”

“Not from your side. Come on, please?”

“Can I have your attention?” Taemin’s voice rings out, cutting off Hoseok’s response much to Bora’s frustration. 

Jongin cuts the music and they wait until the room quiets down.

“Okay! Ballet dancers will be in here with Hakyeon and the rest of you follow me,” Taemin says.

Hoseok and a small part of the group follows him into another dance studio.

“I’m Taemin, this is Sehun, that’s Victoria, and that’s Nahyun,” Taemin says, pointing to each of them in turn. “Let’s begin.”

 

“Hyung I’m dying. I’m actually dying this time,” Jeongguk says from his position on the floor.

“Oh?” Taemin says, standing from his stretch.

“Yes. I’m so hungry. I’m a shell, withering away to nothing. This is the end.”

“Well, can you move your empty shell into the other studio? I have to lock up.”

“Just for that. I’m going to lay here.”

Taemin levels an unamused look at him. “Yeah okay. Victoria? Nahyun? Can you help me move him?”

The girls look over at them and Jeongguk shoots to his feet with a yelp, rushing out the door. Taemin laughs. 

“You would think that someone who could walk right up to a blood soaked Yoongi would have no problem talking with girls and yet, here we are.” Taemin says as he locks the studio door behind them.

He rejoins everyone else in the large studio.

“Where should we go to lunch?” Jongin asks from the floor.

“Uh,” Taemin shrugs. Honestly he hadn’t been going to eat lunch. “Let Jimin pick.”

Jimin freezes and Taemin knows that his intention had been shared by the younger. “Let Jeongguk pick, he’s the one who won’t stop complaining.”

While Jeongguk complains, Taemin fishes his phone out of his bag and checks the texts. 

“Well, we won’t have to worry about lunch,” Taemin says. 

“What do you mean?” Jimin asks.

As if they had been waiting for that announcement, Jinki and Taehyung come through the studio doors with bags filled with boxes. 

“We brought food!” Taehyung says enthusiastically, waving eagerly at Jimin and Jeongguk. 

“For everyone, don’t worry.” Jinki says. 

“You are a true blessing on this earth and if Taemin ever breaks up with you I call dibs!” Sehun says, pushing people aside so he can hug Jinki.

“Excuse you?” Taemin says.

Sehun ignores him and loops Taehyung into a hug as well. Taehyung bits back a whimper of pain, hugging Sehun awkwardly and trying not to cry. 

“Sehun let him go,” Taemin says.

Sehun drops his arms with a pout. “Why is he yours too?”

“You could probably fight Minho-hyung for my affection if you were really determined,” Taehyung says, handing out the food to Jimin and Jeongguk to cover as he gathered himself once more. 

Sehun snorts. “Have you seen his arms? I don’t think so.”

Taehyung shrugs, “Your loss.” He kisses Jimin’s cheek and hisses “You better eat everything in this goddamn box or I will hunt you down,” into his ear, beaming as he pulls away. 

“So now you’re kissing him? Does this mean I have a chance?” Sehun says. 

Jongin clicks his tongue. “You have a boyfriend.”

Sehun shrugs and cradles his food box. “Who says I can’t have more than one?” 

Taemin watches as the bags of food get depleted, and he thinks he can get away with not having to take one. Jinki approaches Taemin with a sharp smile, holding out a box. Damn it.

“And you’re going to eat all of this, right?” Jinki says. 

“Right.” Taemin says sourly, accepting the box.

He sits next to Jimin with a pout. Taehyung is laying next to them, head pillowed in Jeongguk’s lap as he watches Jimin to make sure he finishes. 

“Where’s your lunch, babe?” Taemin asks, picking at his food. “And Taehyung’s?” 

Taehyung laughed nervously, “It was fine.” He hadn’t eaten yet. He’d told Jinki he’d eaten before he picked him up. Hypocritical he knows, but he can’t help the way his stomach churns at the thought of food.

“We’ll get food later.” Jinki says.

He doesn’t do much to hide his dissatisfied pout, but nods along with Jinki, “Yeah, you’re gonna treat me to lamb skewers right?” he grins smugly up at Jeongguk. 

“If that’s what you want,” Jinki says. 

Taemin and Jeongguk pout over at him.

Taehyung laughs, “I’ll save some for you Gukkie, don’t worry.” 

Jinki looks over to where Hoseok is staring sullenly at his food as he eats it. Taehyung follows his gaze and purses his lips, guilt swamping him. He’s angry but Hoseok is eating alone and he looks upset. But he’s angry with Hoseok. Jinki sighs. 

“I’ll be back,” he says, pulling away from Taemin. 

Taemin wonders who he could dump his lunchbox onto. Taehyung stares him in the eye even as he moves, shaking his head subtly. Don’t even think about it. Betrayal flashes in Taemin’s eyes as he sets his jaw and picks up the chopsticks again. Guilt floods Taehyung’s expression and he sighs, mushing his face into Jeongguk’s thigh once again. Absently, the younger pets Taehyung’s hair, frowning at how tired he looks. 

Another sigh and Taehyung hauls himself to his feet. “I’ll be back,” he doesn’t say anything but he heads in the direction of the bathroom so Jeongguk shrugs it off. He doesn’t see Taehyung walk past the door a second time, heading to the back of the building. 

Taemin joins him in the back of the building, lighting his own cigarette as he steps onto the sidewalk. Taehyung glances at him, shoulders tense but doesn’t say anything other than, “Hey.” 

“What’s going on?”

“It’s nothing.” Taehyung says, taking a drag on his cigarette and sighing. 

“Nothing my ass.”

He shrugs, “I don’t know what you want me to say. I picked up another bad habit?”

“Why are you upset?” Taemin asks, flicking off the ashes from the end of his cigarette. “And please tell the truth.”

To avoid having to speak right away, Taehyung puts his cigarette up to his lips. When he finally lowers the cig from his lips, he speaks so softly that if Taemin hadn’t been paying attention he would have missed it. “It’s stupid… but you looked so upset with me…” 

Taemin gently pulls him into a side hug. “You’re the one person I’m never upset with.”

He still looks unconvinced, “Are you sure?”

“Positive.”

The tension in Taehyung’s shoulders lessens and he smiles tentatively at Taemin, before glancing down at his mostly done cigarette. 

“You can always talk to me, okay? No matter what or when,” Taemin says, pressing a kiss against the side of Taehyung’s head. “We should go back inside before Jinki comes looking.”

“Yeah. He’s gonna chew me out either way. We reek,” Taehyung says, staring at the cherry of the cigarette before sighing and stamping it out against the brick wall behind him.

“I’ll take the blame,” Taemin says, pushing the door open. “I’m the bad influence, remember?”

Taehyung seems hesitant. “Are you sure?” He knows Jinki. He knows he won’t really get mad but the fear lingers nonetheless. What if he gets angry this time?

“I’m sure,” Taemin says, linking hands with him.

When Jinki hugs Taemin goodbye, Taehyung  _ knows _ he smells the cigarette that lingers. But the most Jinki does is roll his eyes as Taemin grins at him.

“See you after!” Taemin promises. 

 

It’s halfway through the week the next time Taehyung knocks on their door again, and this time it’s Taemin who answers. 

“Is Jinki here?” Taehyung asks as Taemin opens the door wider to let him in. 

“He’s not home yet. Do you want tea?” Taemin asks. 

Taehyung hesitates before nodding jerkily. He slides into a seat at the counter while Taemin goes about making tea. His plays with the zipper of his jacket, staring blankly at the marble pattern in the countertop, flinching when Taemin speaks again. 

“Are you okay?” He asks, glancing over at the younger before returning his attention to the tea. 

“Yeah. I’m - I just… needed to get away for a while.” Taehyung replies quietly, glancing up at the elder before looking back down at his hands. 

Taemin sets the tea down in front of him before reaching up and ruffling Taehyung’s hair, catching him by surprise. Taemin laughs at his shocked expression before moving over to the couch. 

“Do you wanna join me? I’m in the middle of a really bad horror movie on Netflix,” Taemin says, setting his tea down before throwing himself onto the couch. 

He sinks into the cushions contentedly and flashes a smile at Taehyung before resuming the movie. Taehyung can’t help but appreciate the no pressure situation Taemin had created. Taemin wouldn’t mind how Taehyung chose to react. Still the couch did look comfy. Gnawing on his lower lip, Taehyung walks over to the couch, hands curled around his mug of tea. He settles down in the corner, setting the tea aside after taking another sip. 

As he watches the screen he realizes that Taemin was right, it was a truly awful horror film. The effects are bad and the acting worse. Taehyung slowly relaxes more, stretching out on the couch and pillowing his head in Taemin’s lap. Taemin doesn’t seem to mind, still focused on the bad movie. Taehyung tenses as Taemin’s hands wind through his hair but slowly relaxes as Taemin continues the comforting touch. He finds himself drifting off just as the main character of the film confronts the killer who’s going after her. 

 

Jinki opens the door with Adam and Eve on his heels. He balances the bag filled with food on his hip as he attempts to kick off his shoes and free his keys from the door at the same time. It’s a minor victory when he manages not to drop anything. He gets the door closed and hangs up his keys before dumping the bag on the counter. He makes his way into the living room where Taemin is asleep with his head tipped back against the couch in a position that couldn’t possible be comfortable. Taehyung is asleep with his head in Taemin’s lap and he looks so relaxed and peaceful that Jinki melts a little. He snaps a picture before returning to the kitchen to unload the food as quietly as possible. They could both use more sleep than they were getting. Once the week of rehearsal was over, things should get calmer for Taemin. But Taehyung was still busy, still working too hard. If Jinki could force them to sleep, he would. But for now this would have to be enough. 

 

It’s the last day of practice and Jimin is ready for it to be over. Having to share studio space with Hoseok just keeps getting more and more awkward. He’s not as angry before but he still wants nothing to do with the elder. So when the elder shows up at the loft after he and Jeongguk had made themselves a snack in the kitchen he was annoyed. Taehyung was asleep on the couch but that didn’t stop the argument. It started out quiet, mostly just Jeongguk and Hoseok if he was being honest. Then things… escalated. He couldn’t stop himself from shouting at Hoseok; Jeongguk is between the two of them trying to keep things from getting physical. Then Jeongguk stumbles as Jimin lunges for Hoseok and a small end table topples over loudly. 

The loud bang startles Taehyung from his sleep and he flinches at the sound of shouting. He’s too groggy to place the voices but it doesn’t matter because it’s loud and his heart is racing. He scrambles for shelter. He’s gotta hide somewhere, anywhere. It doesn’t matter where. He curls into a corner, hands covering his ears. If Taehyung can’t hear  _ him _ , then  _ he _ can’t find him. His chest aches and he’s distantly aware of his ragged breathing but his pulse is thundering in his ears and he can’t think. Just hide, wait for it to be over, wait for pain. Hide and wait. Hide and pray that he’ll be left alone. Hide hide hide. 

With every shout he flinches and he can barely breathe. He can’t tell when a hit is going to land and he’s so scared. He’s trembling and he scrambles to hide further in the corner. Make it stop. The lack of pain is so confusing. Why isn’t he hurting? Why isn’t be being hit? It’s normal for his father to punch or slap him now and now he’s lost. Just get it over with. He deserves the pain anyway. Just make it stop. 

Jinki is out of his room in a flash, going after Taehyung with soft words trying to coax him out of the corner. Taemin turns to the three with a glare.

“Get out. Now. Out.” Taemin hisses. 

Jimin, Hoseok and Jeongguk file out of the loft, confusion lacing their expressions. 

Taehyung curls away from the shadow Jinki’s making, raising his arms defensively as he braces himself for a blow. When no such hit arrives he tangles his fingers in his hair, yanking sharply and whimpering words that sound suspiciously like apologies. He doesn’t know what he did wrong this time. His grades are good, he hasn’t talked back, he hasn’t done anything. Maybe that’s why. Was he supposed to do something and didn’t? He doesn’t know. 

“Taehyunggie, baby, stop pulling at your hair. Come here,” Jinki says, holding out his arms expectantly.

It takes several long moments for Taehyung to ease out of his tight defensive ball and he looks so lost that Jinki’s heart breaks. “J-Jinki?”

Jinki nods encouragingly, carefully weighing his options before sitting down next to the younger. 

“I’m sorry. I’m sorry.” He can’t help but yank at his hair again. 

“Please stop pulling your hair, Taehyunggie.” Jinki says it so soft that Taehyung manages to release his hair.

But it doesn’t change the fact that he still can’t breathe. He feels like he’s dying and he can’t breathe. 

“Taetae, you need to breathe. Take deep breaths with me,” Taemin coaches counting his breaths for the younger to follow along. 

“I-I c-can’t.” He chokes out, nails digging into the skin of his wrist as he tries desperately to ground himself. “H-hyung, I c-can’t do i-it.” 

“Yes, you can. Just follow my lead okay?” 

Taehyung’s breathing stutters as he tries to match Taemin and slowly he manages to calm enough to slink into Jinki’s arms, melting into the elder’s embrace, still trembling and crying. He’s babbling, trying to explain but nothing’s making sense and his chest hurts and the tears aren’t stopping. Jinki keeps muttering soothing words to him, lifting him so he can take him back to the rooms. Taehyung tucks his head into the curve of Jinki’s neck, gripping him like a life-line. 

“Should we take a nap?” Jinki asks quietly.

A barely there nod and a soft, “Please. J-just… don’t leave me alone.” 

“Do you want Taemin too?”

Taehyung throws out his arm towards Taemin. “Yes.” 

Taemin climbs into the bed beside them, sandwiching Taehyung between them. Jinki is humming a soft song, trying to be comforting. Taehyung’s head is pillowed on Jinki’s chest and he’s still sniffling but pulling Taemin closer. 

“Should I tell you a story?” Taemin asks, idly winding his hands through Taehyung’s hair so he can gently pet it. 

Taehyung shrugs, unable to find the energy to say anything. His ragged breathing was slowing but his vice-like grip on Jinki’s shirt didn’t falter. 

“This is the story of how two boys fell in love,” Taemin begins. “Once upon a time, two paths crossed in the rain. They didn’t know it at the time, though.”

Jinki hums. “Their first meeting when they actually recognized each other was a battle.”

“It ended in blood, but they both parted ways without trouble.”

“Neither of them gave it any thought until much later.”

“When they met again, it was on much better terms. One of them was on the run from unjust persecution by the law.”

Jinki stifles his laugh. “And the other aided him in his escape.”

“And from then it’s a tale as old as time.”

Taehyung smiles tiredly, eyes drooping and struggling to stay open. His grip is finally loosening on Jinki’s shirt and he makes a halfhearted sound for the pair to continue. 

Taemin laces his fingers with Jinki’s. “It took awhile for them to admit their feelings, things kept getting in the way, people wanted to keep them apart.”

“But in the end true love prevailed and they started dating, I mean courting.”

Jinki looks down at Taehyung to see how he’s doing and smiles at the way Taehyung’s face is smushed against his chest and his eyes are closed, breathing even. His nose twitches in his sleep and Jinki almost coos at how cute it is. Taemin cuddles closer and lets his own eyes close.

“Night, Jinki,” Taemin murmurs. 

“Goodnight.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> tada~


	10. pour yourself something, baby, cheers to this

When the curtain closes, all of them are on their feet cheering. Taehyung is sobbing loudly.

“I’m so proud of them!” Taehyung chokes out. 

Jinki pats his back. “We know. We are too.”

They make their way out to where the performers are greeting the audience members. Taehyung flings himself into Jimin’s waiting arms, babbling about how proud he is and Jimin laughs, brushing the tears off of Taehyung’s cheeks. 

“You’re my big baby,” Jimin teases and Jeongguk pouts.

He doesn’t see Yoongi until the elder is cupping his jaw and pulling him down for a kiss. “You were so amazing,” he says against Jeongguk’s lips. 

Jeongguk turns scarlet. Taemin screeches and Yoongi pulls away, the tips of ears pink. Taemin shakes Minho’s arm.

“Yes! Yes! Guess who’s 35000 won richer?” Taemin shouts, and he can see the other members of his dance crew realizing their loss. 

Jimin squints at Yoongi before glaring over at Hoseok who’s being hugged by Jonghyun while Key stands to the side, watching them fondly. He marches over to the elder and grabs him by a fistful of his loose tank top. 

“Hobi-hyung and I have some things we need to talk about,” is all he says as he drags a terrified looking Hoseok towards the bathroom. 

Taemin smiles at Jinki, who’s in the middle of wiping away his tears. 

“You okay?” Taemin asks. 

“I’m good,” Jinki says with a smile. “Your solo was… amazing.”

“Oh,” Taemin says. It’s clear that Jinki could recognize all the emotions that had gone into it. Every sad, frustrated moment that he had channeled into it. 

He doesn’t hesitate to pull Jinki into a kiss, ignoring the wolf whistles from his dance crew. One kiss turns into two, then three, then four.

“Get a room, will you?” Kibum says, rolling his eyes. 

Taehyung flits around the group of people, congratulating and hugging everyone while Minho stands to the side watching. He’ll say his congrats at dinner, when it’s calmer. A few more minute pass and Taehyung announces he’s off to check on Jimin. 

“Either they’re fucking or I need to help Jiminie clean up Hobi-hyung’s blood.” He chirps. “And I sincerely hope they’re fucking because they have enough sexual tension to power a small city.” 

They only have to wait a few minutes before Taehyung is marching back with a mildly disgusted expression on his face. “Well… They were fucking.” 

“They couldn’t even go to a dressing room? That’s what they’re for, right?” Taemin says. 

“No honey, they’re for getting ready,” Kibum says.

Taemin gives him a nasty side eye. “Yeah because you totally used them for getting ready, did you?”

Taehyung leaps forward to cover Key’s mouth, “Please. Just… don’t. For me, if for no one else.”

“I’m just gonna put this out there, but be careful what you touch back stage if you get what I mean,” Taemin says.

Jinki wraps a hand around his mouth. “And that’s enough from you.”

The crowd is thinning out and Jeongguk has his arm around Yoongi’s shoulder as if he’s afraid that if he lets him go he’ll melt into the crowd. Jeongguk is beaming and Yoongi looks a bit like a grumpy kitten despite the fact that his ears are still pink. 

They hear Hoseok and Jimin before they see them. Jimin’s hair is ruffled and Hoseok looks dazed, his cheeks flushed. Hoseok is cackling and Jimin is yelling at him to shush. Taehyung shakes his head at the sight even as Taemin perks up and pulls out his phone to document his win. 

“They’re gonna hate me,” Taemin snickers as he sends the message to the dance studio’s group chat.

“Is there anyone you haven’t made bets on?” Minho asks, exasperated. 

“I could say no but we both know that’d be a lie,” Taemin says. 

Squinting, Taehyung looks over at Taemin, “In that case…. How much did you make on the bet on me and Minho-hyung?” 

There is a sharp gleam in his eyes and Taemin laughs nervously. 

Taemin pats his cheek, “You’ll never know.”

He pouts, whining, “Hyuuung,”and staring up at him with wide eyes. 

Taemin levels an unamused look at him. “That doesn’t work on me.”

“Fine,” Taehyung smirks, “Jinki-hyung!” He calls resuming his pouting puppy dog eyes. 

Jinki melts, pulling Taehyung into a hug. He presses their faces together and then both of them are pouting over at Taemin. “Taemin-ah how can you say no?” Jinki pouts. 

“You are so unbelievably whipped for him!” Taemin chides. 

“Hey,” Taehyung’s pout deepens. 

“I love him! And obviously  _ someone _ isn’t giving him enough attention,” Jinki says, looking over at Minho. 

“I’m talking it slow. You know, the thing that none of you have ever done?” Minho says.

Taehyung beams, “And  _ I _ appreciate that. Thank you babe!”

“Can we move our asses to the restaurant?” Key asks, arm around Jonghyun’s waist. “We’re hungry.”

“Are we talking as couples now?” Taemin asks. “Because if so,  _ we’re _ also hungry.”

Taehyung makes a grumpy face and pushes past Namjoon and Seokjin, who are cooing over Jeongguk, and slides next to Minho. “Don’t be gross Taemin-hyung.” 

“If you think  _ that’s _ gross-” Taemin is cut off by Jinki putting a hand over his mouth.

“Let’s go get food, yeah?” Jinki says.

 

The fast food joint is near empty as the group makes their way to the counter. They hesitate, mentally trying to figure out how paying is going to work. 

“I’m paying, get what you want.” Jinki says, smiling proudly at Taemin. 

Taehyung’s eyes shift toward the dollar menu. He doesn’t want to be a burden, doesn’t want Jinki upset with him for any reason. He’s not worth spending that much on anyway, right? 

Taemin loops an arm over Taehyung’s shoulder. “Dream a little bigger,” He says, gesturing to one of the combo meals. 

He makes a small grumbling noise, as he picks out something with Taemin’s guidance. 

When everything is ordered, the total is an obscene amount of money and Taehyung can’t help but squawk and tuck himself slightly behind Taemin. Jinki looks at the total and softly exhales before handing over his card. 

“I forget how much you all eat,” he says with a smile. 

“We can pay you back,” Key says.

“It’s fine,” Jinki waves a hand. “Don’t worry about it.”

Taehyung seems soothed by Jinki’s assurances and leads the way towards the booth, sitting down on Minho’s lap to make more room, obviously. Jinki and Jin are at the ends of the booth, with Taemin on Jinki’s lap. Things are relatively quiet until their number is called and Jinki and Jin stand to go get the food, Taemin trailing after his boyfriend. The gossip erupts as soon as they leave the table.  

“So. Taemin-hyung and Jinki-hyung seem like they’re doing better.” Namjoon says offhandedly. 

Key hums, “Yeah. They were fighting, but it seems like everything is back to normal and how it should be. Thank god.” 

“But how did they meet?” Jeongguk asks.

Jimin shrugs. “Like hell if I know. Has anybody just asked them?”

“No. I’m fairly certain it’ll be one of those disgustingly cute first meetings.” Jonghyun says.

“Like they just met and  _ knew _ they were destined for each other.” Taehyung chimes in.

Jeongguk nods, “You’re right, it’s probably something gross like that.”

“What’s gross?” Jinki asks, setting down the trays laden with food.

Taemin is right behind him with two more trays and Jin follows with the last of them.

“Nothing,” they all chorus.

Everyone smashes into the booth together. 

“So hyung, how did you and Taemin-hyung meet anyway?” 

Jinki looks over at Taemin with a small smile.

“You guys really want to know?” Jinki asks.

“Yes!” Jeongguk says.

Taemin laughs at the enthusiasm. “Well it all started one rainy afternoon.”

“The venue was closed, do you remember that?” Jinki asks. 

“Of course I do, it’s why everyone was crammed inside.”

“Right, right. So I think it was somewhere around the third setlist when everyone started going crazy.”

“That mosh pit was insane. So anyway, I’m just minding my own business trying not to get stampeded when all of a sudden he hits me.”

“I felt so bad for splitting your lip,” Jinki says, tracing Taemin’s face.

“I thought you had broken my nose, blood was going everywhere.”

“But I didn’t.” Jinki reminds him.

“So we make our way to the bathroom.”

“And then we started fighting because you noticed the blood was on your shirt.”

“Man I hated you, that got us kicked out of the venue.” Taemin laughs. 

“It wasn’t until we met a couple weeks later that we really hit it off.”

“I still love that motorcycle. That cop had no idea what hit him.”

“It’s not everyday you drive the getaway car for the love of your life.”

“What the fuck?!” Key interjects.

They both look over at him with matching innocent expressions. 

“Is that seriously how you guys met?” Taehyung asks incredulously, the story familiar. He honestly can’t believe that Taemin is that much of a sap. That he’d talk him down from a panic attack with a fairy tale version of their first meeting. 

“Yeah, he’s the reason I didn’t get caught the first time I lifted from a shop.” Taemin says. 

“Talk about perfect timing,” Jinki smiles. 

“Yeah nothing says romance like getting on the back of a stranger’s motorcycle and telling them to drive.” Yoongi rolls his eyes.

“I thought you guys were supposed to be the cute couple.” Jeongguk says, looking like a scandalized grandmother. 

Taemin snorts, “Cute? What, did you think that we had met in a coffee shop, brushed hands as we reached for the creamer and fell in love right there?”

“Well, yeah.”

“Sorry, that’s Key and Jonghyun over there,” Jinki says. 

Key squawks in protest. 

“They’re huge saps,” Taemin says, ignoring the murderous intent in Key’s eyes. 

Jonghyun just shrugs and moves Key’s milkshake out of danger as he launches at Taemin. 

“What can I say? I’m a romantic,” Jonghyun says. 

Taemin taps out of the headlock Key has him in and Key releases him with a final smack upside the head. 

“Brat,” Key says.

“You know you love me,” Taemin says as he launches a fry towards Jimin’s waiting mouth.

Jimin misses and the fry bounces off his face and onto the table. 

By the time dinner is finished, their table looks a bit like a warzone and Taehyung silently starts cleaning up after the group, gathering trash while Minho gathers trays and empty cups. Together the group cleans up their table and stumbles out into the cold night air. The group naturally breaks up into pairs as they make their way to to their homes.  

 

His father’s hand cracks across Taehyung’s cheek and Taehyung just takes it. He deserves it he’s sure. As his father yells at him all he can think is that he’s going to be late for his shift. As soon as his father leaves him alone he pats on a quick, sloppy layer of makeup to cover the forming bruise on his cheek and grabs his bag. Work awaits. 

He realizes too late that he hasn’t eaten anything in over a day. He’s dizzy and weak but he shrugs it off and drinks some soda just to have  _ something _ . He has more pressing things to worry about like the group of nine people who were just seated in his section. So he presses on, going about his day mechanically. 

The day feels like it’s dragging on forever and Taehyung just wants it to be over. Denny’s is ridiculously busy and he’d been asked to stay for longer to help them through the rush. Despite every fiber of his body aching Taehyung agrees because the alternative is going home. He ignores the way his head spins with every sudden movement and his head pounds. 

When a sudden wave of dizziness forces him to clutch the counter so he doesn’t fall over his coworkers take note. 

“Hey you okay?” Maria asks.

His knees buckles even as he brushes her off. Her frantic voice blends into static as his vision grows dark. The feeling of his body hitting the floor is the last thing he recognizes before it fades to nothingness. 

 

“Has anyone seen Taemin?” Jinki asks. 

The boys look up from their cardgame.

“Uh, no?” Jeongguk says.

“We thought he was with you,” Key says.

Jinki opens his mouth and then shuts it again with a frown. “Oh.”

“Is something wrong?” Namjoon asks.

“No, no, of course not,” Jinki says, face melting into a smile.

He waves off their concern and makes his way back to his room. Jimin follows. 

“No, he isn’t there either. Are you  _ sure _ that you haven’t seen him?” Jinki is saying into the phone. 

He huffs at whatever response he gets and runs his hand through his hair. 

“Yeah okay, I’ll keep you updated. Thanks Jongin.” Jinki ends the call and throws his phone onto the bed before groaning. 

He turns to see Jimin hovering by the door. 

“Oh. Hey Jiminie.”

“Is Taemin okay?”

“I think so, don’t worry about it okay?” Jinki’s smile is tight, but he doesn’t want to worry anyone else.

 

When Taemin wakes up, the familiar sound of a hospital monitor greets him. He sighs heavily and stares up at the ceiling before looking over to where the other bed is in the room, curious to know who he would be stuck with this time. Surprisingly, it’s Taehyung in the other bed. 

“Well well well, fancy meeting you here,” Taemin says when Taehyung looks over at him. This must be some form of luck. Or destiny. 

Taehyung smiles sheepishly, “Hi, hyung. What are you in for?” 

“Oh the usual. Apparently these days it’s illegal to pass out on the company dance floor,” Taemin says. He should’ve known it would come to this again. There were only so many hours of intense recital you could go through before your body just said no. And he didn’t remember taking a break in between his 24 hour shift and the rehearsal this morning. 

“I’m going to pretend that I definitely did not hear that,” Jongin growls as he comes through the door, clutching a cup of cheap coffee. 

Taemin beams at him. “What are you in for Taehyung?”

Scratching his nose, Taehyung mumbles, “I might have passed out in the middle of a shift at Denny’s.” 

“Why the hell are you still working there? Is Key not paying you enough? Because I can talk to him.”

“No no. Nothing like that. I’m just trying to move out so the quicker I can save up the money, the better.” Taehyung says, fiddling with his sheets. Truthfully it’s not about the money; it’s about never being home to minimize the bruises his father paints on his skin. 

“I’m going to have Key give you a raise. And then it won’t matter. Jongin gimme my phone.”

“That’s really not necessary, hyung. It’s fine.” 

Taemin pouts over at Jongin until he relinquishes the phone. Taemin smiles in victory and begins to text away. 

Taehyung pouts, wondering where his things were. Just as he’s about the ring for a nurse to ask, Seokjin walks through the door holding his bag. 

“Seokjin-hyung, what a surprise.” Taehyung mumbles sourly. 

“What the hell?” Seokjin snaps, placing the back on Taehyung’s lap. “What the actual hell Kim Taehyung?” 

“And I don’t remember this being your floor. Or wing.” Taemin says sourly.

“Well someone had to stop by to give a certain someone his bag. And considering I’m his brother, it was an easy choice.” Seokjin says, “But it is good to see you Taemin.” 

“Lovely to see you too.”

Looking down at his hands Taehyung asks, “Did they call you?” 

“No,” Seokjin sniffs, “They called  _ Jimin _ , who called me.” 

Taehyung scowls, “What do you mean they called ‘ _ Jimin’ _ ?” 

“Nothing, I just thought you would have put you older  _ brother _ as your emergency contact.” 

“Well, I mean. Jimin is my brother.” 

Seokjin freezes, pulling away. “Do you really wanna do this now?” 

The door opens and Key comes into the room, eyes widening at the tension in the room.  

Taehyung shrugs, “I don’t know. Maybe I do.” 

Taemin sends a pointed stare at Key and Key raises a brow before stepping forward and slapping down a slip of paper. 

“Maybe you want to fill this out,” Key says with a sharp smile. 

“What exactly is it? Am I signing my soul to the devil?” Taehyung teases, even as he glances over the paper with a small frown. 

“Actually, it will deliver you from him. It’s a resignation form, dear. I can easily pay you enough to cover for that…  _ job _ .”

His shoulders tighten and he frowns, “I don’t want handouts.” 

“It’s not a handout,” Key sniffs. “You’ll be working for it and making the same amount of money as the rest of them.”

Hunching up, Taehyung carefully signs the papers, “If you says so,” he mumbles. 

“You’ll be paid for full time now instead,” Key says as he tucks the paper away. 

“Okay. Thank you,” There’s something brittle in Taehyung’s tone and Key frowns, swooping in to press a kiss to his forehead. 

“I’ll see you when you get out of this… place.” He says, waving to Taemin as he passes. 

“Jin-hyung, don’t you have something to do? Like maybe working or something?” Taemin says.

Seokjin sighs, gaze lingering on Taehyung as he goes to leave. He hesitates in the doorway, “By the way Taemin, I hope you know I’ll be calling Jinki.” And with that Seokjin leaves. 

“That fucker has already called him, hasn’t he?” Taemin hisses. As if on a cue, Taemin’s phone lights up.

Jongin laughs nervously and starts packing up his things in a hurry. “Man, I’m not going to be here when Jinki gets here, that’s for sure.”

Taemin watches with betrayal as Jongin leaves the room.

“Do you think that if I ignore him, he’ll stop calling?” Taemin asks.

“He’ll just keep calling until you answer, you know that.” Taehyung says.

“Fine,” Taemin hisses before answering the phone. 

It’s at that moment that Taehyung realizes that the minute Jinki steps foot in their room he’s going to have an earful for the both of them. “Maybe ignore him?” he squeaks. 

Taemin looks over at him with pain in his eyes as he gets chewed out over the phone. “Too late.” he mouths.

Taehyung put his head in his hands and starts mumbling to himself. The nurse comes in, pulling a small cart behind her. “Hello, I’m here to do an examination. Kim Taehyung? We’ll start with you.”

Taehyung looks up in relief, “Draw the curtain.” 

The nurse frowns in confusion before doing like he had asked.

“Et tu, Brutus?” Taemin says, voice coming out more as a squeak. 

Taehyung chokes on a laugh as the nurse instructs him to sit up. They hear the door open again and Taemin’s squawk of fear. 

“Hey Jinki,” Taemin says nervously. 

“LEE TAEMIN HOW DARE YOU.” Jinki shouts.

“Babe,” Taemin says in a wounded voice. “We’re in a hospital, don’t yell.”

Jinki’s voice gets dangerously quiet and the only thing that Taehyung can hear is the occasional whimper from Taemin. 

“But babe,” Taemin protests.

“Do not. Do. Not.” Jinki says. “I want a real explanation.”

“Okay, okay. When we get home.”

“And why not now?”

The nurse goes to pull back the curtain, expression drawn. 

“Please don’t,” Taehyung whispers. 

The nurse frowns, “Is he the one who’s hitting you?” 

“What? God no,” His voice is loud, ringing through the room and he claps a hand over his mouth.  

The curtain is pulled back, revealing a stern looking Jinki. “Kim Taehyung what are you doing here?”

Taehyung’s shoulders jerk up to his ears, looking for all the world like a scolded puppy, “Um… Keeping Taemin-hyung company?” 

“What is your relationship to him?” the nurse butts in. 

Jinki sighs. “I’m… a family friend. I’m supposed to watch over them but obviously I didn’t do a great job.”

The nurse raises her brows but turns to Taemin to complete his examination. Jinki pulls up a seat beside Taehyung and looks at him expectantly. 

Taehyung refuses to meet his gaze as he mumbles, “I passed out,” petulantly. 

Jinki sighs heavily. “You and Taemin are too alike for it to be a good thing.”

“Hey,” Taemin’s voice whines. 

“Taehyung, you did take the offer that Key made you, right?” Jinki says.

Sighing, he nods, “Yes,  _ dad _ .” 

Jinki drops his head into his hands. “Great.”

He ruffles his hair before looking back up at him in concern. Taehyung can feel Jinki’s gaze on him and he sighs. Absently he wipes at his cheeks, smearing makeup thoughtlessly, uncovering the bruises his father left. 

“Again?” Jinki asks quietly.

Taehyung seems to shrink into his bed, he hesitates for a long moment before he nods, “Yes. It wasn’t so bad. I deserved it. I talked back. I know better than that.” 

“You do not deserve it. Ever.” Jinki says with conviction that takes Taehyung by surprise. 

Taehyung shrugs, unable to counter Jinki’s statement. “It’s fine.” He dismisses. “I just can’t ever go home cause when I do this shit happens,” he laughs weakly as if to soften his own words.

“Do you want to spend the night at my apartment?” 

“Sure.” Taehyung says, listlessly.

“We can watch movies!” Taemin interjects from the other bed, where the nurse has finished her examination. 

A weak laugh bubbles to Taehyung’s lips. “Okay. We’ll watch movies.” 

“And get lots of rest,” The nurse stresses as she moves towards the door. 

Taemin smiles broadly, “Of course, lots of rest.”

The nurse points at Taehyung, “And you better eat something.” She glances at Jinki, “Be sure he eats. The meals he’s skipped are half the reason he passed out.”

Jinki nods, “Don’t worry. Both of them will be fine.” 

“I’ll let the doctor know they’re ready to be discharged and have him swing by.” She says, gaze lingering on Taehyung before she leaves the room.


	11. i’m all alone and it’s you that i want

Taehyung still feels awkward about having a key to Jinki’s apartment. Still, he had volunteered to get Jinki and Taemin for the party that Minho and Jin had decided to throw. He lets himself in and hears classical music floating through the apartment.

“Hello?” Taehyung asks.

He hears a small crash, a laugh, then Jinki and Taemin are sloppily waltzing down the hallway. Jinki spins Taemin and they end up crashing into the couch, clinging to each other for balance. It’s then that Taehyung notices the multiple empty wine bottles around the living room.

“Are you guys drunk?” Taehyung asks.

Taemin waves a hand like he can wave away the concern in Taehyung’s statement before making his way over so he can throw his arms around the younger boy. Taemin smiles up at him and giggles in a way that reminds Taehyung of Jimin.

“Do you want some wine?” Taemin asks.

Taehyun refuses and Taemin continues to cling to him.

“What brings you here?” Jinki asks, trying for all the world to straighten out his drunken features into something that looked serious.

“Oh yeah. Minho and Jin are throwing a party at the loft,” Taehyung says.

“My loft!” Jinki wails, all pretense of seriousness gone in an instant.

He gets to his feet again and searches for his keys while Taemin laughs like it’s the funniest thing in the world. When he finds them, he holds them in the air before turning towards the door.

“We need to rescue my loft!” Jinki says.

Taemin shrugs and puts on his shoes before pulling Taehyung with him out the door.

“Hyung, I don’t think it’s a good idea for you to-”

“I’m drunk.” Jinki interrupts Taehyung. “Taehyung, are you drunk?”

“No.”

“Oh good. You drive.”

Jinki tosses the keys to Taehyung with surprisingly good aim for his intoxicated state. He stares at the keys in his hands with abject terror. “Um guys.” he says hesitantly.

“I don’t think he knows how to drive,” Taemin stage whispers, sentence ending in giggles.

“I’ll call an uber,” Taehyung mutters, putting Jinki’s keys down on the counter.

“I’ll pay for the uber. I love uber, it’s so nice and convenient,” Jinki smiles.

Taehyung laughs, “Okay hyung. Are you sure you want to come? You’re smashed already.”

“That’s what makes it more fuuuuun,” Taemin says at the same time Jinki says “I have to rescue my loft.”

Taehyung just shrugs helplessly, “Alright. Let’s go rescue your loft,” he grabs Jinki’s phone to call the uber and once it’s on it’s way, he tucks the phone into his own pocket. Jinki is too drunk to need his phone.

 

The party's just getting into full swing as the three of them make it inside.

“My loft,” Jinki says quietly.

Taemin unwinds himself and disappears into the crowd before Taehyung can catch him.

“This hyung,” Taehyung mutters. He _really_ didn’t want to get wild at this party, but Taemin obviously didn’t have any of the same reservations.

When Minho approaches him with a smile, he also loses track of Jinki (which probably isn’t the best thing) but he melts into Minho’s hug anyway. He would find them. Minho would help him. Taehyung accepts the can of beer that’s offered to him and they make their way deeper into the party. Taehyung keeps an eye out for his two hyungs.

There’s a chorus of hoots and whistles, and Taehyung turns to see Jinki sprawled out on a table with Taemin licking his way up his chest. He bites the lime out of Jinki’s mouth. He’s practically straddling Jinki and things look like they might progress to something… not as innocent as body shots. Taehyung turns to Minho.

“I need everything and anything to drink. Now. I don’t want to remember that in the morning.”

Minho grimaces. “That’s not the best idea, babe.”

“Don’t care,” Taehyung says, winding his arms around Minho’s shoulders so he can wind his hands in his hair. He gives it a gentle tug, smirking at the way Minho’s mouth drops open just a tiny bit. “Please? For me? You’ll keep me in check. I trust you.”

Minho bites at his lip. “Okay.”

 

The music thumps in Jimin’s ears and he tugs Hoseok deeper into the crowd. He feels his boyfriend’s hands on his hip and he can’t help but grin and turn around, throwing his arms over Hoseok’s shoulders.

Hoseok grins and gives his ass a quick teasing squeeze, “Hey sugar, wanna dance?”  

“So gross,” Jimin teases, “But yea. Let’s dance.”

It isn’t so much of dancing as it is grinding against each other to the beat of the music. Jimin tangles his fingers in Hoseok’s hair and mouths along his neck. It’s so stuffy and hot and there’s barely any room between the two of them, hip flush. Jimin is just drunk enough that he’s not too upset about the fact that everyone can see just how hard they are for each other. That doesn’t stop him from littering Hoseok’s neck with hickies just to be sure that everyone knows he’s off limits.

There’s cheering from the other side of the room and Jimin hears Taehyung’s name so of course he’s going to go see what his giant man baby is up to. Hoseok refuses to let him go even as they watch Minho pull off his shirt. Wait… Is Taehyung, his Taehyungie, taking a body shot?

“Yeah he is!” Taemin screams. Oh. He said that outloud. “I’m so proud of him!”

Hoseok presses his hips a little harder into his backside. “Babe,”

“Hobi. I wanna watch baby take his first body shot.”

“ _Babe_.”

“I’ll blow you in the closet if you let me have this.”

Hoseok considers it and nods. “Deal. You heathen.”

Taehyung throws the shot back and ducks down to trace his tongue across Minho’s (well defined) abs. He pauses to suck a hickey on to Minho’s throat before biting the lime.

 

Taehyung _really_ becomes aware of his actions as he’s taking the lime from Minho’s mouth. He just took a body shot. Off of Minho. Oh god. Jimin and Taemin are being extremely loud as they wolf whistle at them and Taehyung wants to melt into the floor with embarrassment. Minho laughs and pulls Taehyung into a kiss.

“Don’t worry about them,” Minho says.

“It’s embarrassing!” Taehyung hides his face in Minho’s shoulder.

Minho laughs, “Babe. We’re all smashed. I’ll be surprised if they remember this.”

Taehyung squawks as Minho lifts him up. “But if you’re still embarrassed we can always go upstairs?”

A drunken giggle bursts from Taehyung’s lips and he nods. “Upstairs. Get me away from these heathens,” He pouts over at Taemin, who’s beaming at him, and Jimin, who is doing his best impersonation of a vacuum with Hoseok’s face.

Minho presses a kiss against the side of Taehyung’s neck and sets him down. When Taehyung is pulled up the stairs by Minho, he’s faced with a familiar scene. Jonghyun is being straddled by Key, and they’re making out in what he’s fairly certain is the same armchair he first saw them in.

“It’s Taehyung!” Jeongguk says. He’s leaning back against Yoongi’s chest, blunt in hand, and from the glazed look they both have, they’re both high.  

“Looks like Minho-hyung is gonna eat him alive,” Yoongi drawls, stealing the blunt from Jeongguk’s hand and taking a drag. Jeongguk giggles as Minho flips them off, Taehyung clinging to his side as they pass.

 

Minho leaves the room, being sure to at least have pants on as he swings the door shut gently so Taehyung can sleep longer. Jinki and Taemin are the only ones awake as he makes his way into the front room. Taemin gives him a shit eating grin.

“Nice.” Taemin says.

That gets a grin from Minho as he saunters into the kitchen to get a cup of coffee. “Thanks. I think?”

Jinki rolls his eyes as he grabs a few breakfast ingredients from the fridge. “That is my _son_ you’re talking about.”

“Ah did the adoption papers finally go through?” Key drawls as he steals Minho’s cup of coffee.

“Hey!” Minho snaps, but he lets Key have it merely pouring himself another cup and sitting down.

Taemin is watching Jinki cook, eyes more focused on his ass than the actual actions of cooking.

“Ass ass ass,” Jonghyun hisses in Taemin’s ear, poking his sides.

Taemin squawks and bats his hands away. “Hyung!” he pouts.

He wraps his arms around the younger, “What? I’m not doing anything other than hugging you. Which I have been sorely deprived of recently.”

“That’s not my fault!” Taemin says, leaning back into Jonghyun’s embrace.

“Shhhh. Just let it happen.”

“Are you gonna smother me?”

“With my love.”

Taehyung decides to make his appearance now, face puffy with sleep and hair an absolute disaster. He’s wearing the same t-shirt he was last night and boxers showing off an impressive array of hickies. He passes Minho and absently drapes himself across Jinki’s shoulders.

“Hyung,” he mumbles. “I smell food.”

“Well that’s probably because I’m cooking,” Jinki laughs.

Taehyung harrumphs and nuzzles his face into the elder’s shoulder. “Thank you, hyung. You’re the best. I love you.”

“I know I am. Love you too.”

He hums again before walking over to Minho and climbing into his lap. He wordlessly steals his boyfriend’s coffee for a sip before handing it back. He lays his head on Minho’s shoulder and dozes to the sound of chatter and breakfast being made.

When he wakes up again he glances at the time and his stomach drops. He goes back to the bedroom wordlessly, pulling on clothes and grabbing his things. Fuck. He was supposed to be home to do something for his dad. Fuck fuck fuck. He forces himself to calm down and waves to the group as he goes to the door.

“Sorry guys. I gotta jet. My dad and I were gonna go out for lunch today.” He lies, kissing Minho briefly and hoping he can’t taste the lie on his lips. “I’ll see you later.”

Jinki makes a noise as the door shuts behind him and Taemin puts a soothing hand on his thigh.

 

The knocking on the door to Jinki’s apartment is frantic and Taemin groans, rolling off of the couch to get it. Standing in the hallway is Taehyung, sobbing and holding his shoulder stiffly. He’s trembling head to toe.

“What’s wrong?” Taemin asks, immediately shaking off any lingering exhaustion and sliding into professional mode.

Yoongi stands up behind him, brows furrowed in concern. “Taehyung? What the hell happened?”

“S-shoulder, “ Taehyung mumbles stepping into the house. “I t-think it’s dislocated. I d-don’t know what I did. I didn’t provoke him. I didn’t talk back. I’ve done everything he asked but h-he just. He was s-so drunk.”

Taemin carefully guides Taehyung to the couch and the younger whimpers.

“Yoongi hold him, I’m gonna reset the arm.” Taemin says.

Yoongi looks horrified, “Like I know you have medical training and all but shouldn’t we go to a hospital? Like they’d have pain killers and shit.”

Taehyung is bracing himself, gritting his teeth for the pain he knows is coming.

“Oh right! Pain meds!” Taemin throws his hands in the air and disappears into the back room.

Yoongi stares after Taemin and then turns to Taehyung, “How many times has this happened?”

The younger looks down at his hands, face still stuck in a grimace of pain as he mumbles an answer.

“What?”

“I don't know. Maybe four or five? There was that one time where I had a really bad concussion and didn’t know where I was.”

Taemin chimes in from the hallway, “It’s six.”

Yoongi’s face is pale and all he can squeak out is, “Who?”

A choked sound escapes Taehyung’s throat, “I- I. Uh, um. I… Uh…”

“Pain meds, swallow.” Taemin saves him from replying and he obediently takes the pills.

Once the pills are down, Taemin gently guides Taehyung to lay down, taking his wrist gently. He’s prodding at the shoulder and Taehyung is hissing in pain.

“First time?” Taemin asks.

“No,” Taehyung whimpers. “Jinnie-hyung just get it over with.” His words are slurred, melding together.

Yoongi frowns, “Is he concussed?”

“Just delirious from the pain. And my heart is in pieces on the floor,” Taemin says, moving Taehyung’s arm slowly.

There’s a sickening pop and then Taehyung slumps over, sobbing into the couch cushion. “Jin-hyung, it hurts.” he says the name over and over.

Taemin sets his jaw. “Talk me out. Of kicking Jin. In the throat.”

“Taehyung needs you not in jail.” Yoongi mumbles, “But that’s not stopping me.”

The sobs are slowing and Taehyung slurs out, “Where’s Jinki-hyung?”

Yoongi pulls Taehyung into his lap, brushing away tears and trying to soothe the younger.

Taemin fishes out his phone and dials Jinki’s number. “Hey babe, you still at work?” Taemin asks.

Jinki gives him an affirmative answer. “What’s up?”

“Where’s Jinki?” Taehyung repeats, loudly.

There’s a scuffle on the other end of the line and it goes dead. Taemin frowns down at his phone. “He hung up on me,” he says in an injured tone.

An incredulous noise escapes Yoongi’s throat. “Don’t we have slightly bigger concerns?” He asks, from halfway under Taehyung as the injured man curls around him, intermittently asking for Jin or Jinki.

“Well he’s always stayed on the phone before.” Taemin pouts.

It’s only a couple minutes later when Jinki comes through the door, shedding his shoes and outer layers in his haste. He goes straight to where he can see Taehyung and gently lifts him off of Yoongi. Taehyung clings to Jinki, stifling his sobs in Jinki’s shoulder.

Taemin is gathering Jinki’s shed clothes and shutting the door, muttering to himself. “Oh hey babe, how was your day? My day was great, thanks for asking. Dance was kind of rough, but you know, whatever.” He aggressively hangs up the coat before turning back to them and waving his hands.

It’s muffled by Jinki’s shoulder but Taehyung mumbles, “Where’s Jin-hyung?” Eyes fluttering as he walks the line of consciousness.

“Do you want me to get him?” Jinki asks baffled. Had they made up without him realizing? What was going on?

“No.” Taemin and Yoongi say in unison.

“S’okay. He wouldn’t wanna talk to me anyway.”

Yoongi scowls.  

“He’s delirious.” Taemin says. “He doesn’t actually want Jin here.”

Jinki nods, “Okay. Now what exactly happened? Why is he delirious?”

Yoongi shrugged, “I dunno. He came in saying someone was drunk?”

“His dad.” Taemin mutters darkly. “It’s a combo of the pain, the meds, and the panic. The sheer amount of mental strain alone...” He shrugs.

It takes about fifteen minutes before Taehyung is thinking coherently and calmed down. He slowly sits himself up, leaning against Jinki’s broad chest and looking at Yoongi’s shoes.

“Are you okay?” Taemin asks, cupping Taehyung’s cheek and the younger nods.

“Yeah. C-can I stay here for a few days?”

“Of course,” Jinki murmurs.

“A few days?” Yoongi asks incredulously, “Why don’t you just leave. Move out?”

Taehyung stiffens, “I _can’t._ ”

“What do you mean you can’t?”

“I can’t leave him. Everyone leaves him. I can’t do that to him. First Jin-hyung left and now mom and I’m all he has. I can’t leave him; he’s my _dad_.”

Yoongi looks to Jinki and Taemin for any support but they just look resigned, like they’ve had this exact argument before. He nods, “Okay.”

 

His cap is pulled low to cover his face, hood up and a mask covering his mouth. He looks suspicious but he’s also hard to recognize and that’s what important as he shakes the spray paint in his hand. Yoongi scowls at the cop cruiser in front of him, scrawling ‘PIG’ across the windshield and then ‘abuser’ across the doors, both sides. Officer Kim’s car is almost a work of art, Yoongi just wishes he’d brought his baseball bat. He shrugs, turning to the other cars and giving them a similar treatment, though the ‘abuser’ tag a unique exception for Kim’s.

Yoongi pauses at Choi’s cruiser, hefting the almost empty spray paint before sighing and polishing the mirror with his hoodie sleeve. He’s been here too long now and so he runs - right to Seokjin and Namjoon’s shared apartment. He bangs on the door until Namjoon opens the door, bleary eyed and with fresh hickies on his throat.

“Ah. I’ve interrupted something. Let me in.” Yoongi pushes past Namjoon.

Namjoon takes a moment to buffer and bemoan his luck before sighing, “Anyone follow you here?”

“Nope.” He smirks, glancing down at the bulge in Namjoon’s pants. “I still haven’t ruined the mood? Damn.”

“Yoongi-hyung, please. What’s this about?”

Yoongi purses his lips and settles himself onto the couch, “I need to talk to Jin-hyung.”

“I- J- He’s busy!”

“Not anymore.”

Namjoon scowls, “I was about to get the best dicking of my life. Can’t this wait?”

“Hmmm. No.” Yoongi crosses his arms and raises a brow expectantly.

Namjoon sighs deeply, before throwing his hands into the air and stalking into the bedroom. A few minutes later Jin is stalking out of his bedroom, robe tight around his frame, scowl plastered on his lips.

“There better be a good explanation for this Min Yoongi.”

Yoongi snorts, “There isn’t. But you’re a horrible brother.”

Seokjin sighs deeply, running his hands over his face and gesturing for Namjoon to get him a drink. “And pray tell what brings this on?”

“It’s been simmering for a while but Taehyung showing up and crying about you really pushed me over the edge.” Yoongi snaps.

“He was crying?” Seokjin’s face smooths out in shock.

“Yes.” Yoongi says, “So maybe you should get over yourself and _talk_ to him.”

Namjoon reenters the room with a glass of wine for Seokjin and he takes it as he says, “Taehyung doesn’t want to talk to me, Yoongi.”

“I’m sure that’s exactly what you like to tell yourself.”

Jin scowls, “He won’t let me talk to him. What am I supposed to do? Anytime I try he gives me the cold shoulder or he just snaps at me.”

“I would start with an apology next time.”

Jin throws his hands up in the air as Namjoon makes a hum of agreement.

“Look. Jin.” Yoongi drops the honorific. “He feels like you abandoned him. He’s hurt. Just man the fuck up and say you’re sorry.”

The silence rings in the room and Yoongi sighs and heads for the door. It slams behind him and Seokjin stares after him jaw dropped as Namjoon gently leads him to their room. Namjoon knows that Jin will need some time to process what just happened and so as he tucks the elder into bed he sighs.

“Did I really abandon him?” He asks softly, face pressed into a pillow.

Namjoon shrugs helplessly. “I don’t know. You were trying to do what’s best for you but you left your brother alone during a really difficult time. He’s hurting. He probably misses his mom and he feels like you don’t care. I’m not saying you abandoned him but it wouldn’t be a stretch for him to feel like that.”

Seokjin sits up, “I abandoned him” He says flatly.

“In a certain sense of the word, yes. You did.”

A strangled sound makes it way out of Seokjin’s throat. “I’m a horrible brother oh my god.”

“No, you aren’t. You unintentionally hurt your brother while grieving and now you need to apologize to him. That’s all there is. You can fix it and it’ll be okay,” Namjoon pulls Seokjin into a hug and smooths his hand across the elders back.

It would all be okay because they’re family. He just hopes the revelation isn’t too late.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> validate us and leave us comments. it fuels us


	12. i want your everything

His brother’s apologies are still rolling around his mind as he takes the spray paint from Namjoon. On one hand, he desperately missed his brother and the relationship they used to have. On the other hand, he’s still  _ mad. _ It’s been months and he’s so angry about how Seokjin left him with their piece of shit father. How he left him to grieve for their dead mother alone. 

Namjoon hums as they paint absently. “Do you wanna talk about it?” 

He shrugs, “I’m just… angry. I was alone for so long and now he’s trying to fix things and I  _ missed _ him. But I’m still hurt. His apologies don’t make up for everything.” 

“I know you don’t want to hear this but for you to be able to mend your relationship with Seokjin-hyung, you’re going to have to forgive him. You’re going to have to do your part of the work.” 

Groaning, Taehyung swaps colors, keeps painting as he says, “I know. But I just... I need time to process and I need to calm down before I see him again. I’m angry but I know that I need to work on forgiving hyung before anything can happen. I don’t know what to do.” 

Namjoon opens his mouth to respond just as the lights of the cop car flash. 

“Shit.” he says instead. 

“Fuck.” Taehyung eloquently agrees, tossing the paint down the alley, “Do we run?”

The intercom on the car crackles to life. “Namjoon. Taehyung. I know it’s you. Stay put.” Senior Choi’s voice says.

“I guess not,” Taehyung grumbles, folding his arms across his chest, anxiety blooming there.

“Well shit.” Namjoon says, leaning against the wall and lighting a cigarette. 

Choi steps out of the car and leans against the door. “Are you two gonna get in nicely?”

Namjoon ponders this, then stubs out the cigarette on the brick wall. “Okay.”

He leads the way to the car and Taehyung follows behind, crumbling into himself and trying to look as small as possible. His dad might just kill him for this. If he’s lucky. 

 

They stand in the corner of Senior Choi’s office as he sits down at his desk with a sigh.

“I  _ really _ don’t want to charge you for this,” he says.

“Well, technically, we were just loitering.” Namjoon says with a smile. “Nothing else going on.”

Taehyung doesn’t have much to add, too focused on scanning the bullpen for any sign of his father and keeping his face behind Namjoon whenever he sees someone who looks remotely similar. Senior Choi sighs heavily.

“Okay. You win.” Senior Choi says. “But I’ll be having a chat with your dad. Jinki will not be happy.”

At the mention of ‘dad’ Taehyung’s face goes white, eyes wide and fearful. He deflates as soon as Jinki’s name is said. Jinki won’t hurt him. But he can’t say the same for if his father finds out he’s here. For any reason. 

“Just. Go wait in the waiting area.” Senior Choi says, making a shooing motion with his hands and dialing Jinki’s (most likely memorized) number. 

 

Jinki makes his way into Senior Choi’s office.

“Where are the kids?” Jinki asks, looking as if he had dragged himself out of bed.

“They’re in the waiting area. But there was something that I wanted to talk to you about.” Senior Choi says.

“It won’t happen again,” Jinki says.

“Not about that.”

“Oh? Then what could we possibly have to talk about Mr Senior Superintendent General Choi,” Jinki says, nervously using his full title.

“Jinki. The kid. What’s going on with him?”

“ _ What? I have no idea what you’re talking about there are two kids there _ ,” Jinki’s words start to blur together. 

“Don’t bullshit me. He turned white as a ghost when I said the word ‘dad.’ What’s that about?”

Jinki hesitates. “I can’t say much. But what I  _ will _ say, is that there are some… bruises. That show up. After… encounters… with his dad.” He looks away. “I’m gonna go get the kids. Thanks for calling me,” he says with a tight bow. 

 

Jinki pinches the bridge of his nose as they walk out of the holding area. Namjoon is all smiles as he greets Jinki and Jinki levels his best fatherly ‘I expect better of you’ expression at Namjoon before gathering Taehyung in a hug. 

Namjoon pouts at the biased attention but doesn’t say anything as he watches Taehyung scan the office, clearly looking for  _ something _ . He doesn’t seem to find it and relaxes ever so slightly. Jinki pets his hair before releasing him.

“You two worry me sometimes. Contrary to your beliefs I do not like to receive calls from the police department this late at night.” Jinki says. 

He waves to Senior Choi as they pass him and he waves back with a slight frown on his face. 

“Lovely to see you again, Mr. Choi,” Jinki says. “Tell your wife we said hello.”

“Can you kids at least try and stay out of trouble?” Mr. Choi says, knowing that it’s fruitless to ask. He knew his son and his friends. They were all trouble, but still good kids for the most part. He just wished that they wouldn’t end up in the holding cells as often as they did. 

And now, there was the potential that one of them was being hurt. By one of the members of his own team.

Jinki waves him off as he ushers the two out the door.

 

It’s been nearly a week since Yoongi has seen or heard from Taehyung and he’d be lying if he said he wasn’t worried. He has a reputation of being a heartless bastard but anyone within their motley band of boys would say otherwise, Taehyung and Jeongguk in particular.

He stares at the entrance of the loft, worrying his lip between his teeth while the kids do their homework around him. Finals week is approaching and it’s crunch time for everyone. Jinki’s brows are furrowed and he looks more tired than usual. He keeps checking his phone like he’s expecting something to light up his screen. 

Yoongi frowns, mimicking the action. He’s texted Taehyung but he has yet to receive anything other than read receipts. He takes comfort in the fact that at least his messages are being seen. Yoongi knows what’s going on in Taehyung’s life and that the younger doesn’t want to talk about it. That’s fine by Yoongi so long as he’s okay. 

But everyone is worrying about him, even if they say otherwise. Jeongguk even asked him last night if he thought Taehyung was okay or if he’d heard from him. And Jimin keeps zoning out from his homework to stare at the door. Hoseok bounces around the loft going person to person and doing his best to cheer everyone up - ignoring his own homework in the process. It’s a testament to how long he’s known Hoseok when with just a single glance he can see the tension that he’s hiding from everyone else. 

His thumbs hover over the keyboard of his phone as he debates whether or not he should text Taehyung, if only for something to do. A muffled clatter draws his attention to the door. It swings open and Taehyung stumbles in. His nose is bleeding and bruises are blooming along his cheek and jaw. Yoongi jumps to his feet, somehow beating Minho, and loops an arm around Taehyung’s waist. Taehyung hisses and Yoongi’s heart drops. He gently lowers Taehyung into a seat as Minho scrambles for ice. Taehyung wipes the blood away with the back of his hand, sniffling. There are new shadows under his eyes and Yoongi squints. 

“Are you okay?” Yoongi asks, voice soft despite the fact that he’s already planning revenge. 

“Who did this to you?” 

“No one, hyung. I just got into a fight. I’m fine.” 

Yoongi frowns at the blatant lie to Jimin, but he moves out of the way for Minho as he hands the younger ice and a wet rag. Taehyung nods his thanks. 

“Why’d you get into a fight?” Minho grumbles, “Why’d you get into a fight without us there as back up?” 

Taehyung just shrugs and Yoongi puts aside his worry to help tend to the obvious wounds. Jimin hovers nearby with a scowl on his face, holding Hoseok’s hand tightly. 

“Taehyung, can I talk to you for a minute? Privately.” Jinki tacks on at the look on Minho’s face. 

The younger nods, standing stiffly and following Jinki down the hall to his room. Once they’re alone Taehyung deflates, sitting on the bed and looking up at Jinki hesitantly. 

“Why didn’t you text me? Or  _ call _ me?” 

Taehyung’s lower lip wobbles, “He took my phone. Then when he gave it back he beat me up so bad I could even  _ move _ .” 

“What do you mean you couldn’t move?” Jinki asks, voice barely above a whisper. 

Taehyung wordlessly lifts his shirt, revealing dark bruises. Jinki stares at them, horrified. 

“I think something’s broken,” Taehyung says brokenly and when Jinki looks at him he can see the glaze of tears in the younger’s eyes. “But this is the first time I’ve been able to move and I tried to leave but my dad made sure to give me an excuse for why I was limping.” Taehyung smiles bitterly, but he can’t hold it for long. 

“Taehyung…” 

He lowers his shirt. “It’s fine hyung. I just gotta make it through finals. I’ll move out after I don’t have to worry about that shit,” his voice is thick with unshed tears and Jinki aches. 

Jinki doesn’t have to say anything, just look at Taehyung and he scrambles to add, “I promise hyung. And I’ll stay here for a few nights.” 

“And you don’t want to go to the hospital, do you?” Jinki asks, trying not to sound hopeful.

Taehyung shakes his head, “No. They ask too many questions. And if my dad finds out he’ll go ballistic.” 

Jinki sighs. “Will you at least let Taemin take a look?”

He hesitates, “I guess…” 

Jinki dials the number quickly, “Babe Taehyung needs you here. At the loft.”

Jinki holds the phone away from his ear as Taemin screeches something back at him. “He hung up on me?” Jinki says. 

He opens the door to the room, nearly causing Minho to fall into the room. “Are you okay?” Minho asks as he straightens up and goes to sit beside him. 

Taehyung grumbles, “Just peachy.” 

Everyone is crowding into the room, trying to help. The front door slams open, startling them all and Taemin comes into the loft with his dancer shorts on and a semi normal looking shirt on as if he had been in the middle of getting dressed when he had rushed out the door. He shoves his dance bag into Minho’s chest and dumps the med bag onto the floor in front of Taehyung. 

“Everyone out. Now.” Taemin snaps, tone leaving no room for argument and the boys comply. 

Fresh tears of relief are forming in Taehyung’s eyes and Minho whines, “But-”

“Get out,” Taehyung says softly. 

Minho pouts but leaves the room as requested, closing the door behind him. Taemin flips the lock on the door so no one can come in.

“What’s wrong?” Taemin asks. 

Taehyung’s lips tremble as he softly explains, “I think something’s broken in my ribs. And everything hurts hyung.” 

“I’ll check your ribs. Anywhere else you think is broken?” 

He shakes his head. “I think my knee is fucked up, but I ran here so I don’t think it’s broken.” 

Taemin unzips his med bag. “I’m gonna need you to strip, but in the least sexual way possible.”

“Kay, I figured. I just hoped otherwise,” Taehyung mumbles kicking off his pants and hesitating at his shirt. “Hyung can you help me?” 

Taemin helps him pull the shirt off and softly exhales as he sees the extent of the bruises. 

The younger halfheartedly covers his chest with his arms, feeling vulnerable and exposed. There are scars from injuries Taemin’s never seen and the raised circular blisters from stamping the cherry of his cigarettes on his skin. 

Taemin gently prods at his ribs and Taehyung gives a cry of pain when he finds the broken one. “The good news is that only one of your ribs are broken. The bad news is that the rest of them are badly bruised and there’s really nothing I can do.”

Tears roll down Taehyung’s cheeks and he brushes them away roughly. “Okay. Okay. What about my knee?” 

Taemin kneels beside him and moves his leg, trying to ignore the swelling and checking the movement of the knee. “What did he do?”

Taehyung laughs bitterly, “He kicked my knee out from under me so he could curb stomp my ribs.” 

“You’re lucky it isn’t broken,” Taemin says softly. “But it’s sprained.”

A swallow and Taehyung nods, his hands resting over his self-inflicted burns, hoping that Taemin ignores them or didn’t see that. 

“Do you want to talk about those?” Taemin asks. 

Shaking his head, he says. “Nope. It’s fine.” 

Taemin sighs. “Okay.” He hands Taehyung a couple of pain meds. “Do you want me to get anyone?”

“Just Jinki-hyung. Why’d you kick him out?” Taehyung moves to pull on his clothes again. 

Taemin shrugs. Once Taehyung is fully clothed, Taemin opens the door. “Jinki?”

Jinki slinks into the room. “Babe. Why’d you kick me out?”

Taemin shrugs again.

From his perch on the bed Taehyung makes grabby hands for Jinki, but it’s a nice change from last time where Taehyung was in so much pain he wasn’t making sense. Jinki joins Taehyung on the bed and cuddles him close and Taehyung sighs in contentment. 

“Thank you,” He mumbles, closing his eyes. “I’m gonna sleep and hope when I wake up this has all been just a vivid nightmare.” 

Jinki’s brow is furrowed as he looks over to Taemin and Taemin just shakes his head sadly. What more could they do?

 

Jinki pulls Taemin down the street like an overexcited child. Snow falls around them gently, making everything look soft. 

“Come on, aren’t you excited?” Jinki asks.

“I am, I am.” Taemin promises. 

“But?”

“I’m worried about the kids. It’s the end of their finals week and I just worry.”

“Do you want to go back and check on them?”

Taemin looks at Jinki and sees the honesty in his eyes. Jinki was almost too perfect like that, willing to drop everything for someone else. Taemin shakes his head and takes Jinki’s hand. 

“No, it’s our date night,” Taemin says.

Jinki hesitates until Taemin tugs on his hand impatiently.

“Come on, you planned this. Aren’t you excited?” Taemin teases.

Jinki laughs as they resume walking. The streets are filled with other couples and Taemin finds himself staring around at all of the Christmas lights in wonder. They buy hot tea and end up sitting on one of the many benches that line the park. 

“Do you want noodles for dinner?” Jinki asks. 

“Sounds delicious,” Taemin says. 

They find the closest noodle shop they can and duck into it, shaking snow out of their hair and brushing it off of each other. They slide into the booth together and order. They’re sitting close enough together that Key would probably give a snarky comment, whispering to each other as to not disturb the other patrons. 

“There’s a little carnival around the corner. Should we go to it?” Jinki asks. 

Taemin’s eyes light up in excitement. “Sounds fun.”

They finish their meal and bicker over who would pay the bill. 

“I have more money, I can pay,” Jinki says. 

“I have money too. I can pay,” Taemin counters.

“I took you on this date.”

“It’s  _ our _ date night.”

Jinki pulls the bill towards him and his wallet at the same time. Taemin swipes it, puts his card in, and hands it off to the waitress before Jinki can react. Jinki turns to him with a shocked expression. 

“I said I would pay,” Jinki protests.

“Guess you’ll have to pay me back then,” Taemin says, pressing a swift kiss to Jinki’s cheek before retrieving his card from the waitress. 

Jinki’s frown melts into a smile as Taemin pulls him out of the booth. 

“You’re the worst,” Jinki says.

“I know,” Taemin laughs. 

The snow has stopped falling when they make their way out of the shop, and their breath comes out in white puffs. Jinki pulls his scarf tighter around his neck, trying not to let any of the cold hit him. Taemin is carefree, seemingly unbothered by the cold. The carnival is in full swing when they get there, full of couples and families. They wander about, looking at some of the booths that try and get to sell them small presents or coupons, as well as games for prizes. The people running the booths try to draw them in by showing off their prizes and games. There are strength testing games and couples games, all promising the best rewards. The one that catches Taemin’s eye is a dance competition that most people seem to be struggling with. It’s one of those dance dance revolution type games that seems to be modified to be at the most advanced level. 

“Do you want to try it?” Jinki asks, noting how Taemin is practically bouncing with excitement.

“Of course!” Taemin says. 

They wait in line while Taemin studies the dance while the people in front of him try it. 

“You think you can win this?” Jinki asks. Neither of them had even bothered to glance at the prize list for the game. 

Taemin gives him a look that can only be described as haughty as he steps onto the game mat. He smiles politely at the couple running the game and they start the dance. Jinki watches Taemin fly through the dance, gathering a crowd that cheers for him as he makes the dance look easy. Jinki finds it easy to remember why he had fallen in love with Taemin in the first place. He was passionate, alway giving it his all no matter what the task was. 

And dancing. God, Taemin was good at dancing. One of their first dates had been to a club, Taemin had definitely known what he had been doing. They had danced the night away, well grinding would be the more appropriate term, and Jinki had been hooked ever since. Taemin’s hips were sinful, and he was still grateful Taemin was his. He was still surprised that the younger had even wanted the relationship in the first place, he was nothing special and Taemin was signed on to be a professional dancer. 

Taemin finishes his dance with a bow and his score flashes up on the screen, 98, the highest score that the game had recorded. The couple hands him something and he bows again before making his way back to where Jinki is waiting. Taemin throws his arms around Jinki’s neck and Jinki spins him around a couple of times. 

“Look babe, I won a free christmas cake,” Taemin says, brandishing the slip of paper proudly. 

“You’re amazing,” Jinki says. 

“I know. So are you,” Taemin says, kissing him on the nose. 

He tucks the slip of paper in his pocket and links arms with Jinki, lifting his mood without even being aware of it. 

“It’ll be such a nice surprise for the boys,” Taemin says happily. 

They peek around at the rest of the stalls in the street carnival before heading back to walk around the park. The lights twinkle and Taemin admires the beauty of it as they walk along. Taemin dances a couple of paces in front of him, happy because of the weather. Jinki’s heart swells at the sight and he wants to have all of these little moments, damn it all. It gives him the push to finally say what has been on his mind for ages. When Taemin notices Jinki isn’t beside him, he spins to find Jinki kneeling. 

“Did you fall?” Taemin asks, concern flooding his features. 

Jinki laughs nervously before taking Taemin’s hands in his own.

“Taemin-ah, will you marry me?” Jinki asks.

Taemin’s eyes go wide and his mouth drops open in shock.

“I-I didn’t buy a ring, because i was afraid I’d lose it, or drop it, or-” Jinki is cut off from his nervous babble by Taemin grabbing his face and kissing him. 

“Of course I’ll marry you Jinki,” Taemin says. 

Taemin kisses him again and they fall off balance together into the snowbank. Jinki laughs and peppers kisses across Taemin’s face.

“We can pick out rings later,” Taemin says.

“And we’ll tell the rest of them when we do,” Jinki says. 

Taemin pulls Jinki to his feet and they brush each other off. 

“Should we head back home?” Jinki asks. 

“Definitely. We need to celebrate,” Taemin says. 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> so this is the last "fluffy" chapter before the end so um, buckle in mates.


	13. i will confess what has been on the tip of my tongue tomorrow

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> please read the tags

No one makes sound decisions after midnight and Taehyung is no exception to that rule. The bottle of valium stares him down from the bedside table and his chest hurts because everything is too much and it’s so tempting. Sure his friends would be sad, but his dad would certainly be better off if their most recent argument was anything to go by. At least he’s pretty sure there’s no other way to misconstrue “You’re a fucking disappointment” and “You shouldn’t even be alive.” And if he died at least he’d be with his mom. At least it would all stop hurting. 

It’s that thought that prompts him into action, choking down pills as quickly as he can. When the bottle is empty he sits back and waits, wrapping himself in a blanket because he feels oddly cold and distant from himself. He trembles and hopes that it won’t hurt. That he’ll just fall asleep and not wake up. He unlocks his phone and stares at the group chat, wondering if he ought to say something. Should he say goodbye? He muses that question until guilt sinks into his stomach like a stone. 

It takes Taehyung roughly fifteen minutes to regret his actions. He curls into his mattress tears welling as he shakes. He doesn’t know what to do. He knows he took enough to kill himself - he made sure of that. Numb hands dial the first number that comes to mind: Seokjin. 

The phone rings and rings and rings and he chokes on a sob when there’s no answer. 

“Jinnie-hyung please. I did something stupid and I need your help. I don’t know what to do. Hyung please.” He sobs harder when he’s reminded that he isn’t really on speaking terms with his brother and he’s probably being ignored. “I’m sorry. I’m so sorry.” 

He hangs up, throwing the phone across the room before scrambling after it, head spinning. He does the only other thing he can think to do. He can’t call Jimin or Jeongguk; he can’t burden them like that. He gnaws on his lip as the line rings. 

The line connects and he hears a drowsy “Hello?” before there’s a scuffle and Taemin’s chipper voice takes over. “Hello!” 

Now that someone’s answered, Taehyung doesn’t know what to say. He’s tired and he just wants to go to sleep but he’s scared and sobbing so hard his head hurts and he can’t get words out even though he’s  _ trying _ . 

“Taehyung? Hey Taetae you need to tell me what’s wrong.” 

“Hyung,” he stumbles over the words, “Hyung, I did something stupid.” 

“What did you do?” There’s a sharp edge to Taemin’s voice and Taehyung whimpers. 

“I… I took a whole bottle of valium. I’m sorry.” The words spill out and Taehyung curls into a tight ball on his floor, “And Jinnie-hyung didn’t pick up and I don’t know what to do.” He’s slurring now. 

“Shit.” There’s the sound of rustling and Taemin hissing something to Jinki and then, “Where are you?” 

Taehyung shivers, “Home. Dad left like a half hour ago.” He mumbles, eyelids feeling heavier with each passing moment. 

“Hey stay with me baby. Jinki and I are on our way.” 

“‘M sorry.” He’s still crying, “I’m really sorry. I’m stupid. This was stupid.” 

Taemin’s voice is soothing and Taehyung’s eyes are closing even though he’s trying so hard not to fall asleep. “That’s okay Taehyung. Can you keep talking to me?” 

There’s the sound of an engine in the background and he tries, he really does but all that comes out of his mouth is garbled. He can hear the blood rushing in his ears over the sharp sound of Taemin’s voice and he wonders if they’ll ever forgive him. His father is right; all he ever does is cause trouble. Even his own brother hates him. Everything feels slow and one more faint “I’m sorry,” falls from his lips before he succumbs to the call of sleep. 

 

When they can’t get the door open, Jinki kicks it down. Taemin rushes through the rooms until he finds Taehyung curled on the bed.

“Jinki how long until the ambulance?” Taemin asks, his voice far too calm for the situation as he rolls Taehyung onto his side in case he throws up. 

“Two minutes,” Jinki says, putting the phone on speaker. 

“Any idea how much he took?”

Jinki holds up the empty valium bottle with a grim look. “Enough.”

“Taehyung can you hear me?” Taemin asks, pulling back his eyelids. “How long has it been since you took these?”

Taehyung makes a grumbling noise, but at least he’s conscious again.

“Jinki you might not want to look at this,” Taemin says. “I’m going to have to make him vomit but he has to be awake. Taehyung, baby, come on stay awake. I know it’s hard.”

His eyes slip closed again and Taemin hisses out curses. The operator on the phone is saying things that Taemin is mostly ignoring. What’s important is Taehyung. He’s seen overdoses. He’s seen all the ways they’ve gone wrong. He doesn’t want Taehyung to end up like that. Taemin needed the ambulance to be there now. He can’t lose him. 

Taehyung stops breathing moments before the paramedics get there. Taemin starts compressions. He can’t lose him. He  _ won’t _ lose him. The paramedics come into the room and Taemin recognizes some of them.

“OD via valium. Three minutes since he was breathing on his own. We need activated charcoal and get him to the ER,” Taemin says. 

Once Taehyung is lifted onto the cot, Taemin backs away enough to let them leave the room.

“Do you want a ride?” one of the paramedics asks.

“Yes.” Taemin says.

“I’ll bring the car,” Jinki says quietly.

 

Working in the emergency room is always hectic. It’s his job to be ready for basically anything that comes through those doors and it’s a job Seokjin takes pride it. He’s listening carefully to the briefing for the patient rolling up an ambulance, nodding along with the other nurses. 

“We have a twenty one year old male, overdosed on valium in an attempted suicide. According to paramedics he’s having difficulty breathing and is unresponsive. We’re wheeling him into room three.”

He can hear the commotion of the patient being wheeled in behind him but he stays focused, only half listening at the overlapping voices. 

“What’s his name? We’ll need to contact his next of kin.” 

“Kim Taehyung,” Seokjin stiffens, freezing. “And his next of kin is right there.” 

Taemin’s voice is cold and Seokjin turns around facing the younger, who’s standing out of the way of all the nurses next to Jinki. He’s scared to look down at the bed and when he does he let out a shaky breath. His younger brother is horribly still on the bed, chest barely moving. 

“I can stay,” he croaks out. 

The head nurse shakes her head, “Go clock out,” she orders, “Let Nathan know.” 

Seokjin nods gratefully and rushes out, fighting back his own emotions. He’d known things weren’t going well for Taehyung. He’d seen how skinny he’d gotten; how closed off he’d become but he hadn’t known what to do. Things had been strained for so long that he didn’t know how to fix them. 

The locker room is quiet and Seokjin opens his locker changing out of his scrubs and snatching his phone from his bag, opening it up. His heart sinks when he sees the barrage of phone calls but the one that catches his eye is the call he’d missed from Taehyung a little over than half an hour ago. He’d left a message and his hands tremble as he raises the phone to his ear to listen. 

His heart breaks at Taehyung’s voice and he can’t stop himself from crying as he listens to his brother’s frantic words and apologies. When the message is over, he lowers his phone and holds his head in his hands while he sobs. It takes him a few minutes to collect himself and he stands up, ignoring the way his mind offers statistics that hurt more than help. 

Taemin and Jinki are sitting outside in the waiting room when Seokjin joins them. Taemin tries his best to not glare up at him, but the look he gives him is still entirely glacial. 

“They’ll let us in to see him soon, but three at a time because he’s in ICU still. I think one of the nurses wants to talk to you,” Jinki says.

“What about?” Seokjin asks.

Jinki gives a noncommittal shrug. “You’ll see.”

Taemin gets on his phone and seems to be calling the other members. He dials the numbers, gives whoever picks up the hospital name and tells them to get there fast before hanging up and dialing someone else. He seems to be moving on autopilot and when he’s done he stares blankly at the wall. Jinki gently takes his hand and plays with his fingers, trying to pull Taemin out of his frozen state.

Minho and Yoongi are the first to arrive. They both look stressed and they both make a beeline for Taemin. 

“What’s going on?” Yoongi asks, looking around the waiting room for familiar faces. 

Taemin rattles off a series of numbers, repeating them over and over like some kind of prayer.

“What’s he saying?” Minho demands. 

“They’re codes. Taehyung ODed. He’s gonna be fine.” Jinki says.

Yoongi’s face pales and Minho sits down heavily on a chair looking like he just got sucker punched. 

The next group to make into into the waiting room is Hoseok, Jeongguk, Jimin and Namjoon. The group of students look towards their elders. Namjoon takes the initiative to be the spokesperson. 

“Who’s hurt?”  

“Taehyung.”

“What happened?” Jeongguk asks, eyes wide as Jimin and Hoseok start to tear up on principle. 

Key comes into the room with Jonghyun hot on his heels. Jonghyun sees the two crying and starts to tear up as he gathers the two in a hug.

“What’s wrong?” Key asks, looking around the room. “Where’s Taehyung?”

Jinki speaks up this time, “Taehyung overdosed. We’re waiting to hear from the nurse.”

 

It feels like forever before one of Seokjin’s coworkers approaches, looking a little intimidated by the group of leather clad boys sprawling throughout the waiting room. 

“Seokjin, can I speak to you in private for a moment?” The nurse asks and Seokjin nods, dread coiling in his stomach as he stands. 

“Of course, Mina.” Seokjin follows her into a small private room and the feeling of dread intensifies. 

“Is he okay?” He asks, a little desperately. 

Mina nods, “Yes, he’s stable.” 

Seokjin sinks into a chair in relief. “Good,” 

“He’s sedated right now, but I wanted to ask you a few questions.” 

Seokjin nods, “What do you need to know?” 

“Were you aware that your brother was suicidal?” 

“No,” His heart aches. 

“Did you know that he self harmed?” 

Guilt curls around his heart like barbed wire, “How?” he whispers. 

“I’ll take that as a no.” Mina says softly, “It looks like he… burned himself with cigarettes.” 

A choked noise escapes Seokjin’s throat. 

“I’m afraid that the bad news doesn’t end there.” Mina murmurs, passing him a chart. 

Seokjin reads the chart quickly, brows furrowing. The chart, in addition to Taehyung’s vitals and basic information, details cracked ribs, deep tissue bruising, bruising to the torso and jaw, contusions on the back of the head - all at various stages of healing. He raises a shaky hand to cover his mouth and lowers the chart. 

“I take it you didn’t know?” 

Seokjin shakes his head, lowering his face to hide in his hands. 

“Do you want me to grab someone for you?” She asks kindly and he nods. “Who?”

“N-namjoon. Pink hair,” his voice is choked. Mina nods and walks out of the room, back into the waiting room. 

The group of boys stand as she enters the waiting room, and Mina balks. “Namjoon? Jin wants to see you?” 

Namjoon steps forward and the rest of the boys look stricken. One of the shortest boys with orange hair sinks back into a chair, looking close to tears. 

“Taehyung is stable. He’s heavily sedated right now, but he’s going to be fine.” Mina reassures them and the boy with orange hair buries his face in his hands and lets out a sob. “Please, follow me.” 

Namjoon follows Mina into the small room and instantly goes to Seokjin’s side. “Baby what’s wrong?” 

“He’s hitting him,” Seokjin chokes on a sob into Namjoon’s shoulder. 

“Whoa whoa whoa.  _ Who’s _ hitting Taehyung?” Namjoon asks, alarmed, stroking Seokjin’s hair. 

“Our dad,” Seokjin hisses, “I should have seen it. It’s textbook. He pulled away, his self-esteem plummeted, he’s depressed. He - he tried to  _ kill _ himself,” his voice broke.   

“Jinnie, baby, you guys just barely started talking again, of course you didn’t notice,” Namjoon says. 

Jin shakes his head, “But I’m his older brother. I’m supposed to take care of him. I know how awful our father can be. It’s one of the reasons I moved out when I did. I just left him there. And then mom got sick and-” 

“Baby, baby, breathe. You can’t do this to yourself.” Namjoon soothes, pulling Seokjin in closer and pressing a kiss to his forehead. “He’s okay and we know now. We can help him. It’s gonna be okay.” 

Seokjin chokes on another sob. “I want to see him.”

“Okay. Let’s go see him.” Namjoon says, pulling the elder to his feet and smoothing away the tears on his cheeks. He presses a comforting kiss to Seokjin’s forehead and leads him towards the group of friends huddled in the waiting room. 

Jimin is pacing the waiting room, Minho is talking quietly on the phone and Taemin and Jinki are nowhere in sight. Seokjin is willing to bet that they’re with Taehyung. Yoongi confirms that when he speaks up.

“They’re visiting Taehyung right now. You can go in.” Jeongguk pouts in Yoongi’s arms squirming, mumbling about how he wants to go see Taehyung. 

“There’s only room for one more person and we thought you’d like to see him.” Kibum says, smoothing his hand down Jonghyun’s back. 

“Thank you,” his voice is still thick and he walks over to the nurses station to find out his brother’s room number. With that information he leaves Namjoon at the door and slips inside. 

Taehyung is asleep on the bed, a breathing tube down his throat and all manner of medical devices attached to him. Taemin has his limp hand clutched in one of his, the other hand holding Taehyung’s wrist just to feel his pulse. Jinki is sitting behind Taemin, face pensive as he gently rubs Taemin’s shoulders. He’s murmuring softly in Taemin’s ear, consoling him as best he can. 

The atmosphere is brittle, and Seokjin doesn’t dare shatter the silence so he sits down at Taehyung’s other side and takes his hand, pressing his forehead against Taehyung hand.  

Taemin isn’t quite sure how long he stays there, holding Taehyung’s hand and staring down at his closed eyes. And all at once, he can’t sit still anymore. He stands, ignoring how he startles Jin and Jeongguk (who must’ve entered the room while he hadn’t been paying attention). As soon as he leaves the room, Jimin enters it. Taemin makes eye contact with Yoongi and he nods.

“Hey, uh, we’re going out,” Yoongi says. 

“For a coffee run,” Taemin finishes.

They pull on their jackets and Taemin leans down absently to give Jinki a kiss.

“Text us if you want anything,” Taemin says.

Jinki nods and passes Taemin his keys. 

“Don’t get caught,” Jinki says quietly. 

Taemin flashes a smile that doesn’t quite reach his eyes, and pulls Yoongi out the door.

 

Taemin pulls on his facemask as they get closer. Yoongi already has a baseball cap pulled low over his eyes and he passes Taemin a beanie.

“That’s Kook’s so don’t ruin it,” Yoongi warns.

Taemin pulls it on as he rolls his eyes. “Yeah, okay.”

The car is the only one in the lot. Perfect.

“Cameras,” Yoongi warns.

“Got it,” Taemin says, pulling out a slingshot. 

Yoongi raises a brow and Taemin ignores him, aiming at the cameras on the building. He hits them with precision that surprises Yoongi. 

“I got bored at church camp,” Taemin says like it explains everything. 

“You. Going to church camp,” Yoongi deadpans. 

“I’ll have you know - dash cam -” Taemin pauses to swing his bat into the front windshield. The car alarm blares and he ignores it, smashing in the driver side window so he can open the door. “I’ll have you know that I was a model camper!” he shouts to be heard over the alarm.

“Oh, I’m sure,” Yoongi says. 

Taemin tears into the dash, cutting wires at random.

“Why do you say that like you don’t believe me?” Taemin asks as he finally cuts the right wire and silences the alarm. 

Yoongi snorts as he climbs onto the hood of the car. “Forgive me for having a bit of trouble picturing you as a model camper.”

“That’s so rude,” Taemin says, crawling out of the car so Yoongi can begin with his bat.   

As Yoongi swings his bat he grunts, “What can I say I’m an asshole.” The side mirror breaks off of the cruiser with a satisfying crunch. 

Taemin wanders around to the back of the cruiser, hefting his own bat. “I know. It’s why we’re friends.”

“Glad I was forced to sit next to you during bible study rather than what was her name… Jeanie?” Yoongi smirks as Taemin’s bat shatters the glass. 

“ _ Jeanie _ needed to learn how to keep her hands to herself,” Taemin says. “If anyone in that school needed Jesus it was her.”

He laughs, busting a tail light, glass tinkling on the ground as they step around the car. “You remember that time I convinced everyone I was my twin sister ‘Yoonji’ and everyone freaked the fuck out when I went into the boy’s bathroom?” Another grunt as he busts the passenger side window. “Pretty sure that was when Jeanie decided I was demon spawn. She never bothered us after that though.”

“You were my blessing,” Taemin says in a falsely sweet voice. 

“Anything for you sweetcheeks,” Yoongi stands back as Taemin swings his bat into the windshield again. “How much longer you think we got?” 

“Seven minutes?”

“Perfect,” Yoongi flicks out his pocket knife, jabbing it into the front left tire and slashing. “I hope all these damages come out of his paycheck, disgusting fucker.” 

Taemin pulls out a can of spray paint with a grin. 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> yell at us on twitter @askBandK


	14. let's get into it, get stupid

Kibum has taken it upon himself to cook for everyone. And Jonghyun thinks he understands. Everyone else is busy shifting in and out of Taehyung’s hospital bed whenever they’re free, no one seems to be focused on anything other than Taehyung. So Kibum had started cooking for everyone. Jonghyun knows that Kibum hates hospitals, he hated everything that had to do with them, too many memories associated with it. 

And Jonghyun can tell that Kibum appreciates when they all drop by their apartment to grab food, or a nap. Their apartment was the closest to the hospital Taehyung was in, so it made sense that it would become the new center for everyone for the time being. 

Kibum is frying some kind of meat, probably for lunch, while Taemin is sitting at the counter watching. Namjoon and Hoseok were sprawled out on the couches, Jeongguk had claimed the floor. Jonghyun can sense the stress coming off of everyone. 

“Do you need help babe?” Jonghyun asks. 

Kibum shakes his head. “It’s almost finished. How many should I make to take over?”

“There’s only three of them over there. Jinki is at work,” Taemin says quietly. 

“How much longer do you think they’ll keep him before the discharge him?” Jeongguk asks.

“A week? Maybe longer?” Taemin says. 

Kibum adds, “It depends on his psych evaluation really. If they think he’s a danger to himself they can admit him to the psych ward until they feel he won’t do something stupid again.” 

Jonghyun wraps his arms around Kibum’s waist, nuzzling his face into the side of his neck. Kibum sighs and relaxes back into the embrace. Kibum had wanted to protect Taehyung, he hadn’t wanted him to follow in his footsteps and yet here they were. Taehyung had overdosed because Kibum had failed to help him, had failed to see the signs he had once lived through. 

He sends the others off with food and they leave the apartment deathly quiet. 

“Talk to me,” Jonghyun says.

“I feel like I failed him,” Kibum admits, voice barely above a whisper. 

He’s gripping the counter tightly and Jonghyun puts his hands over his boyfriend’s. 

“You did the best you could considering the situation. We all did,” Jonghyun says. 

Kibum shrugs, “I know that, but I still feel like I should have seen it…” 

“It’s not your fault that you didn’t see it. Taehyung was keeping secrets from all of us and that included what he was feeling. We didn’t see it because he wouldn’t let us, Kibum.”

 

The worst thing about being in the hospital, Taehyung decides, is the sheer boredom. He’s watching some shitty drama while the doctors discuss whether or not he’s stable enough to discharge. Truth be told he wasn’t sure that he was feeling any better. He still feels empty and wants to die; he just doesn’t have the energy to even fathom trying to kill himself again. But he tries not to let the doctors know that. He just wants to go  _ home _ . 

Home meaning Jinki’s apartment that’s warm and inviting and always smells faintly of tea. Where he and Taemin curl up on the couch to binge watch shitty horror movies with the dogs at their feet. Where Jinki always makes sure he’s well fed and taken care of. 

He looks up at the sound of people walking into his room and tries not to curl into himself as he meets the gaze of Superintendent Choi and Seokjin. Seokjin immediately sits down next to his bed and stares at Taehyung’s hands for a moment before sighing. 

“Taehyung… We’re pressing charges against our father.” 

Wide eyes snap to Seokjin. “What? No! Why would you? You can’t just-”

“Taehyung, I understand that you’re scared of him but we want to make sure he won’t hurt you or anyone else again.” Choi chimes in. 

“Y-you can’t. I didn’t want this. I just wanted to g-get out.” Taehyung stammered, trying to blink back budding tears. His stomach drops as his mind races and he feels faintly sick. “He’s gonna be so mad.” 

“You will be safe. We’ll guarantee that, but it’s important that we press charges. He was in the police department,” Choi says. 

“He’ll tell everyone I’m lying, just like last time. No one will believe me.”

“Not this time.” Choi says firmly.

Taehyung’s brows are furrowed and he looks so conflicted that Seokjin’s heart breaks. “I know you’re confused and you might even love him but he hurt you and he deserves to be thrown in jail for that. Do you understand?” 

“But-” 

“No buts,” Seokjin says gently. “I know you’re scared but we’ll be with you the entire process and everything will be fine. Okay?”

“O-okay.” 

They leave the room for him ‘to process’ and he scrambles for the phone. He hesitates dialing Jinki’s number and changes his mind. He brings the phone up to his ear, gnawing on his lip anxiously as he waits for the line to connect. 

“Hello?” Key’s voice is tinny through the phone and Taehyung’s eyes well up and he’s not sure why he’s crying anymore. 

“I wanna talk to you.” He mumbles.

There’s scuffling on the other end of the line. “I’ll be there. Give me a couple of minutes.”

“Okay. See you soon.” 

 

Key lowers the phone slowly. 

“You okay?” Jonghyun asks.

“No.”

“What’s wrong?”

“Taehyung- he wants me,  _ me, _ there to talk to. What do I do?”

“Go talk to him?”

“Why me? Why is it me? I’m not good at these kinds of things!” 

“Maybe he wants someone who understands.”

Key looks over at Jonghyun sadly. “Oh.”

“Go talk with him. And when you get back we can watch Pinocchio together.”

Key flashes a smile and grabs his jacket. 

He makes it to the hospital in record time and hesitates outside Taehyung’s door for a moment before he steels himself and walks in. 

Taehyung frowns at him. “How are you here already?” 

“What do you mean?” 

“It’s only been like five minutes since I called. And you live like ten minutes away.” 

Key shrugs and makes himself as comfortable as he can on the stupid hospital chairs. “What did you want to talk about?” 

“It’s stupid…” Taehyung hesitates now, anxiety and confusion mixing on his face.

“Just tell me about it, stupid or not I want to hear it.”

Taehyung wrings his hands, “Seokjin-hyung and Superintendent Choi are pressing charges. And I’m scared. And I don’t want them to, but they didn’t listen to me at all. They just said they were doing it and I’m not sure what to think. I thought Seokjin-hyung would at least defend my thoughts but he just… pushed to press charges. He said our father deserved to be in jail and it’s just too much and I don’t know what to do.” 

He snaps his mouth shut with an audible click as if he’d said more than he wanted to do and looks down in his lap. 

Taehyung hears Key shifting beside him and then the elder is gently taking his hand. “What do you want to do?”

“I don’t  _ know _ . I just wanted to move out and get as far away from him as possible. I didn’t want to press charges against my own dad. I just wanted it to be over and done with.” Frustrated tears spill down his cheeks. “Everything is so messy and I’m scared.” 

“No one ever wants to press charges,” Key says quietly. “That’s why it’s important someone does.”

“It doesn’t feel worth it. Even if he’s in jail and I’m safe, I’ll still be that man - that boy - who couldn’t fight back. I’m still gonna be scared and I’ll still… I’ll still hate myself for what happened.” 

“You’re choosing to fight back now. That’s what’s important.”

“But I’m not. I’m running and everyone else is fighting for me,” Taehyung argues, “I just wanted it all to stop but now I’m stuck here and no one will let me run anymore. They’re making me do this and I  _ can’t _ . I couldn’t take the pressure and so I tried to fucking kill myself and it didn’t work and now there’s more pressure and I can’t do this and no one understands. I’m so overwhelmed.” His voice breaks, and then he’s sobbing, hiding his face in his hands because he’s weak and can’t face Kibum any longer.

“I understand. And that’s probably something you don’t want to hear, because you’re living through this now and you feel alone and you feel like no one gets you. But I know what it feels like.” Key is looking down at his hands, looking like he was a thousand kilometers away.  

Taehyung mumbles, “It feels like everyone's against me. But you don’t make me feel like it’s my fault or that I’m stupid for going back even after all the times he hit me.” He peeks out at Kibum, eyes red and puffy. 

“Because it’s not,” Kibum says simply. “You go back because they’re familiar. And maybe if you can just get it  _ right _ the next time they won’t hit you.”

Taehyung’s face crumples and he nods empathetically, reaching over the edge of the bed to pull Kibum into a tight hug. They’re both shaking and Taehyung tucks his head into the crook of Key’s shoulder. He can’t think of anything to say other than “I’m sorry,” and he mutters it thoughtlessly into Kibum’s shoulder. 

Key ends up crawling into the hospital bed beside him and it’s just comforting for them to lie there together. Key pets his hair as he cries but doesn’t try to say anything because he  _ knows _ . He knows what it feels like to finally be free from the person you weren’t quite convinced you needed to be freed from in the first place. 

 

The day Taehyung is discharged is chaos. Jinki knows that Taehyung doesn't expect anything other than the guest bedroom he’s been occupying off and on for the past year but Jinki wants to make sure Taehyung is comfortable. Together with Jimin, Jeongguk, Yoongi, and Minho they’d gone to Taehyung’s house to get his belongings. So here Jinki was scrambling to organize Taehyung’s new room, even though it didn’t really need it. 

Taemin is busy in the kitchen, preparing a huge meal for everyone. Jinki can hear the sounds of the dishes being set down a little too harshly on the counter and knows Taemin is stressed. 

“Babe, ease up on the dishes,” Jinki calls as he smooths out the wrinkles on the bed spread for the tenth time.

“Sorry!” Taemin replies.

“It’s okay,” he replies fondly, “Do you know when Jonghyun and Kibum will be picking him up?”

“It’s soon, right?” Taemin says. “And everyone else should be getting here any time now.”

Jinki hums and decides he’s fussed enough over the bedspread. He joins Taemin in the kitchen, wrapping his hands around the younger’s waist and nuzzling into his neck. He pulls away at the sound of knocking. 

Jeongguk is waiting on their doorstep, hoodie pulled up and a cake in his hands. Yoongi is half a step behind him, hands tucked into his pocket. 

“Is anyone else here?” Jeongguk asks as he steps inside. 

“Nope.”

Jeongguk just nods and Yoongi hangs up his jacket before slipping into the kitchen to bother Taemin. Jeongguk carefully sets down his cake and latches onto Jinki, squeezing him. 

“Jeongguk?” Jinki asks, confusion lacing his tone.

“I want affection. Cuddle me dammit.” 

Jinki laughs as he wraps his arms around the younger and rocks him side to side in a hug. Jeongguk hums contently, nuzzling the elder’s shoulder happily. He doesn’t let go of the younger even as he opens the door to let Hoseok and Jimin in. Jimin gives them a brief confused look before he pulls Hoseok along to join Taemin and Yoongi in the kitchen. Jinki can hear Taemin giving the others instructions on how to finish the dishes and set the table. He lets in Namjoon and Seokjin and Minho next and then it’s just a matter of waiting for the last three to get there.

“Jinki, babe, do we have a time estimate?” Taemin says, wandering out of the kitchen.

He comes to wrap his arms around the both of them, sandwiching Jeongguk between them.

Jinki’s phone buzzes in his back pocket, “I’m betting that’s Kibum saying they’re on their way,” he goes to grab his phone and Jeongguk makes a whiney noise in the back of his throat. 

“Taemin, would you be so kind. I have a needy baby in my arms.” Jinki chuckles, wrapping the arm back around Jeongguk. 

Taemin reaches around to pull out Jinki’s phone. “They’re about five minutes out.”

He tucks the phone back in Jinki’s pocket and tucks his hands into Jinki’s back pockets.

Jeongguk finally pulls away to bounce anxiously on his toes watching the door. Yoongi chuckles, sliding behind the taller boy and wrapping his arms around his middle. 

“Relax. You saw him yesterday.”

“I know... But he’s coming  _ home _ now. It’s different.”

“Different how?”

Jeongguk fiddles with his sleeves, “We didn’t know how he felt before and now we do. What if he tries again?” he asks quietly. 

Yoongi frowns, not really sure what to say. He pulls Jeongguk closer. 

It’s Jimin who finds the words, “He’ll be okay Gukkie. And because we know we can help keep him from feeling that way again.” 

“But,” Namjoon chimes in, “We can’t treat him like glass. I know you’re worried but if we do that he’ll pull away from us again.” 

Jeongguk opens his mouth to say something but the door swings open and Kibum steps in, Taehyung at his heels and Jonghyun close behind. Jimin darts forward to throw his arms around Taehyung and the younger laughs. 

“You saw me two days ago.” 

“But now you’re a free man.” Jimin says, pulling away to poke Taehyung’s cheeks.

He snorts, “I wasn’t released from prison, Jiminie.”

“Tell that to the number of texts you sent to me saying it was like a prison.” Jimin huffs. 

“So, can I hug my boyfriend or not?”

“No,” Jeongguk answers, joining in on the hug. 

Eventually they pull away and Minho thinks  _ this is it. This is my chance. _ But before he can make it more than two steps Taehyung is being swept into a hug by Jinki. He throws his hands up and sighs. 

“Okay okay, Guys. Dinner is done and it’s not gonna be good cold.” Taemin says, walking into the kitchen. “Come get it. I’m not serving anyone.”

The shuffle for food gives Taehyung a moment to breathe before he tucks himself into Minho’s side. They don’t say anything as they follow the crowd into the kitchen and Taehyung wonders if Minho hates him now. Afterall, he was the one who didn’t say anything to anyone, much less his boyfriend. He pushes that thought aside as Taemin shoves a plate of food in his hands.

“I thought you weren’t going to serve anyone, hyung.” He teases.

“You’re the exception,” Taemin replies, kissing the top of Taehyung’s head. 

He smiles down at the food and at least for right now, he thinks that things are okay. 

 

After dinner, everyone squeezes into Jinki’s living room to watch a movie. Jonghyun and Key are crammed onto the couch with Jinki and Taemin, Yoongi and Jeongguk have claimed one of the armchairs and Namjoon and Seokjin get the other one, leaving the others to sit on the floor. Taehyung takes one look at the arrangement, shrugs, and crawls into Minho’s lap without a word, beaming as Hoseok crawls into Jimin’s lap. Jimin smiles back, wrapping his arms around Hoseok’s middle and perching his chin on the taller man’s shoulder to see over it. The movie is animated and light, and it’s just what they all need to relax with.

 

After the movie is over, the group slowly goes their own ways. First to leave are Kibum and Jonghyun. They hug everyone before they leave and Key makes it a point to kiss Taehyung’s forehead. After the door swings shut behind them it takes Yoongi roughly twenty minutes to convince Jeongguk to go home. Jeongguk pouts and clings to Taehyung. He sputters at the strength, but laughs. 

“Just go home Guk. I’ll be here tomorrow. You can come see me then.” Taehyung smooshes Jeongguk’s cheeks in his hands. 

Jeongguk grumbles but nods, “Fine.” He squeezes Taehyung one more time before going to pull on his shoes.

Yoongi smiles, fond as he watches Jeongguk, and pulls Taehyung into a tight hug, trying to convey all that can’t be said out loud. Taehyung gets it and squeezes the elder just as tightly. 

Hoseok and Jimin, as well as Namjoon and Seokjin, all leave at the same time and Taehyung tries not to feel anxious as they leave him alone with Minho. He knows that as soon as they’re out the door, Jinki and Taemin will go into the other room to give them privacy and Taehyung is  _ dreading _ it. Minho had been distant since he had attempted and Taehyung doesn’t blame him and knows they need to talk about it, but he’s nervous. He doesn’t know what Minho is thinking and he knows that if he were Minho, he’d be angry. He’d be hurt. And Taehyung is terrified that Minho hates him now. It’s completely irrational and he knows it, but that doesn’t stop the anxiety from curling in his gut. 

As if reading his mind, Taemin keeps the couple company as Jinki makes more tea. Minho looks like he wants to ask if Taehyung is okay but remains quiet, simply observing the younger. It makes Taehyung even more nervous, the way unsaid words hang heavy in the air. When Jinki hands him a steaming mug, Taehyung grips it tightly, holding it to his chest. He knows he can’t delay it any longer so he gives Taemin and Jinki a small, half-hearted smile as they leave. 

The silence is awkward and deafening. The longer the silence stretches the more Taehyung convinces himself that Minho hates him. He can’t bring himself to break the tension and just stares into the mug. 

Minho breaks the silence, setting his cup down and sighing, “We have to talk about this.”

“I know,” Taehyung murmurs. “I just…. Don’t know what to say. I don’t know what you’re thinking or what you want me to say.” He bites his lip.

“I just. Why didn’t you tell me?” 

“I don’t know. I didn’t want anyone to know? I just wanted it to go away and I was ashamed.” He’s trying to speak honestly, biting back half assed lies or half truths.

Minho takes one of his hands, “God Taehyung, I know you were scared and hurt but why didn’t you let anyone help you?” 

Taehyung jerks his hand out Minho’s gripping his own biceps, “What was anyone going to be able to do? No one took me seriously the first time I reported him, what would make this any different?” 

The air in the room is suddenly more tense than before. “You tried to report him before this?”

“Yes,” Taehyung says, staring at his abandoned mug. “I don’t want to talk about it. It was stupid and I regretted it.” 

Minho’s hands hesitate over Taehyung’s shoulders, aching to pull him into a hug. He pulls away, trying to figure out what to say to that. What do you say to that? But he still has so many questions. How long had Taehyung been suicidal? Why hadn’t he talked about that? When he asks, Taehyung shrugs. 

“Dunno. It was too much and I already felt guilty for pulling Jinki-hyung and Taemin-hyung into my mess. I didn’t want anyone to have to deal with more shit.” 

Minho frowns, “But we would have wanted to help.” 

He sighs, “I didn’t want anyone else to feel bad because of the way I felt. I didn’t want anyone to look at me different. I just wanted thing to  _ stop _ . I don’t know what you want me to tell you Minho. I wanted to die because I thought it would make things better? I just didn’t see a way out of my shitty situation.” 

“I want to know why you couldn’t tell me how you were feeling? I’m your boyfriend for Christ’s sake.” 

“What was I supposed to say? Hey Minho, I wanna fucking drink a bottle of bleach? Or yeah, the reason I won’t take off my shirt isn’t because I’m shy it’s because I have bruises fucking everywhere and hate the way I look?” Taehyung stands, moving away from the couch. His face is pink with frustration. 

“Yes.” Minho snaps. 

“And what would you have then? Huh? Your boyfriend wants to kill himself and has an abusive dirt-bag father. What would you have been able to do? Nothing would have changed. All it would have done is cause you needless worry and stress.”

Minho frowns, “I was worried regardless. And I wanted to be able to help you.”

“How?” Taehyung asks. “What would you have done differently?”

“I would have told someone.” 

Taehyung whirls around, “Even if I asked you not to? Even if I wouldn’t let  _ Jinki-hyung _ tell someone?” 

Minho gapes at him. “I-I.”

Taehyung doesn’t say anything as he waits for a reply. When Minho can’t muster a response, Taehyung sighs. “I just. Need you to understand that I was doing my best. I know it doesn’t make sense much sense to you, but I… I was just trying to survive.” 

Minho is silent, and Taehyung sighs. “I’m not expecting you to get it right now. Just try. I’m gonna go to bed.” 

Minho leaves Jinki’s apartment is a daze, struggling to wrap his brain around what Taehyung had ask him to consider. From his perspective it was all so simple. But Taehyung’s desperation made him rethink that. The way Taehyung talked, it sounded so messy and Minho worries that he unintentionally made things harder for Taehyung. 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> come yell at us on twitter @askBandK


	15. it's a cold and it's a broken hallelujah

He doesn’t know what’s changed since moving out of his father’s home, but he can’t help but flinch at raised voices or movement out of the corner of his eye. He can’t help the overwhelming anxiety and fear. And he can’t stop the nightmares. Taehyung is just glad that he doesn’t wake up screaming. The last thing he wants is to be more of a burden than he already is. 

He wakes from his nightmares drenched in a cold sweat and shaky. Nausea swirls in his gut and he clenches his jaw to keep from vomiting. His father’s angry yelling is still echoing in his ears and his chest hurts from how ragged his breathing is. He puts his head between his knees, and chokes back sobs. 

It feels like it takes hours for the terror to subside and Taehyung peels himself out of bed, staggering to the kitchen. He splashes water on his face, trying his best to be quiet as he pours himself a drink. His hands tremble and he swears when he drops the glass, it shattering by his feet. He ducks down to clean it up, cursing under his breath. 

 

Taehyung is on the floor and Taemin is the only one there to save him. There’s blood spreading out in a puddle coming from Taehyung and Taemin can’t find the source. He can’t find it how does he stop it? Did he get shot? Was he stabbed? Taemin doesn’t know but he tries to put pressure on his stomach, trying to stop the bleeding. Taehyung is trying to say something to him and Taemin leans in closer to hear him.

“It’s… your fault… hyung,” Taehyung manages to get out.

Taemin jerks awake and sits up. His chest is heaving and he tries his best not to wake Jinki up. He didn’t want to have another conversation where they both tried to brush off the fact that they were  _ not _ coping as well as they should be. Jinki mumbles a bit and rolls over, pulling the covers back over his head as he goes back to sleep.

Taemin makes his way quietly into the kitchen, leaving the dogs in the room with Jinki.

At the soft scuff of bare feet on tile, Taehyung jerks up, backing away from the shattered glass and looking up at Taemin with wide, scared eyes. 

“Oh. Hey Taehyunggie,” Taemin says softly.

“Hi, hyung.” Taehyung’s voice is raspy and he kneels back down to keep cleaning the glass, pulling the garbage can closer. “Careful, I… dropped a glass and it shattered.” 

“That’s like the eighth one we’ve broken this week,” Taemin says. “I keep telling Jinki we need plastic but he thinks glass looks better.”

Taehyung hums, “I’m sorry,” for lack of anything else to say and sighs at the wet puddle, free of most glass (he hopes) that he has to mop up. He grabs a dish towel and mops up the water. When he’s done he stands up, and sets the rag in the sink. 

“I think it’s all cleaned up,” he murmurs, leaning against the countertop and looking all together too small. 

“That’s good,” Taemin says. “What should we make for breakfast?”

“Dunno. I’m not really hungry.” Thinking of food makes him want to gag. He pours himself another glass of water and sips it, before getting Taemin a glass just for something to do. 

Taemin hums. “Well what should we make Jinki for breakfast?”

“Uh… waffles?” He doesn’t sound convinced himself. “Rice? I dunno. I’m bad at this. What do people normally eat for breakfast?”

Taemin shrugs and goes to open cabinets. “I’m sure we can find something. Or we could just say fuck it and make cookies.”

“Cookies sound… good.” 

“Cookies it is.”

 

Jinki wakes up to the smell of cookies. He peeks his head blearily out of the covers and yes, there is the smell of cookies wafting through the apartment. Adam and Eve are already sitting at the door and Jinki lets them out as he wanders towards the kitchen. 

Taehyung is sitting on the counter munching on a cookie as Taemin pulls what looks like the last batch out of the oven. Jinki shuffles over to drape himself over Taemin as soon as he sets down the hot tray.

“Morning hyung.” Taehyung mumbles, “Coffee is ready if you want some.”

Jinki grunts thankfully, and detaches himself from Taemin to pour himself a cup of coffee. 

“Why cookies?” Jinki mumbles. 

“Why  _ not _ cookies?” Taemin asks. 

Jinki just shrugs and goes to sit at the counter with his coffee. Soon enough Taemin disappears to get ready for work, and then it’s just Jinki and Taehyung left to waste away the hours with tv before they have to get ready for their own jobs. 

 

Jinki and Jonghyun decide to take a night class together. They have no real reason to, but the thought of doing  _ something _ while everyone else is busy is comforting. Jonghyun picks the class, which is how their Tuesday evenings become knitting nights. Jinki doesn’t know why he thought it was a good idea to craft. He isn’t good at it. No matter how closely he follows the instructions, the minute he gets even slightly distracted it turns into a giant knot. They invite Namjoon out as well, and Jinki figures if there’s anyone who would understand his knitting struggles it would be Namjoon. 

As it turns out, Namjoon is unnervingly good at knitting. Jinki looks down at his disaster of a sweater sadly. He was all alone on the island of no knitting talent. He just wanted to knit a sweater for his fiancee and instead he ended up with a knot of yarn. 

“Hyung just relax,” Jonghyun says. 

“This is harder than it looks!” Jinki says.

“I know!” Jonghyun says. “I’ve been practicing.”

For a moment the only sound they can hear is Namjoon’s knitting needles clicking together. Jinki and Jonghyun both look over at him and he slowly lowers the knitting project. 

“Teach me your ways!” Jinki says. 

“I just… do it! Just be the knitting needles, be the knitting project,” Namjoon says. 

“I feel like I am the knitting project! Just a giant mess!” Jinki say, setting his knot down harshly on the table. 

“Okay… Do you need to talk about it?” Jonghyun says. 

Namjoon gently puts down his own knitting project. “We are here to talk, hyung.”

Jinki sighs, ruffling his hair with his hands. “I know, I should talk about it. But I don’t really want to.”

Namjoon looks over at Jonghyun, before he sighs and says, “You really should though. I can’t imagine how stressful it’s been for you and Taemin. I mean, you were the ones he called. You can’t let that weigh on you forever hyung.”

“I’m totally not stressed, look at me. I’m knitting. That’s the opposite of stressed.”

“Hyung…” Jonghyun says warningly.

Jinki sighs. “It’s been stressful. But I’m fine.”

Namjoon snorts, “Bullshit.”

“He’s right, you know. You don’t have to be fine all the time.” 

“But I do,” Jinki protests. “And I am. I’m fine.”

“Jinki-hyung. Please. We’re just worried about you. We want to make sure you’re not bottling up your emotions.” Namjoon says, watching as Jonghyun takes Jinki’s hand. 

Jinki entwines their hands and waves them around. “I’m totally fine. Totally.”

“The more you say that the less I believe you.” Jonghyun deadpans. 

Jinki puts his head down on the table. He says something that gets muffled by his sweater.

Namjoon rubs Jinki’s back, “What was that?”

“I don’t know how I can help them.”

“What do you mean?” Jonghyun asks.

“I don’t know what to do.”

“None of us do.” Namjoon says, “And just because you feel like you don’t know what to do doesn’t mean that you’re not. I don’t have any idea how Taehyung would be coping if it weren’t for the stability you’re offering him.”

Jinki gives a forced laugh. “That’s me, Mr. Stability.”

Jonghyun inhales deeply, “I swear to fuck- Jinki-hyung. We’re just asking you to tell us how you  _ feel _ . This isn’t rocket science. Don’t overthink it. We know you feel like you need to be ‘Mr. Stability’ but we want to know how you  _ really really feel. _ ”

“I  _ really really _ feel like I need to go pick up Taehyung. It’s eight.” Jinki says, scooting out of the way.

“Ah ah ah, not so fast. Jin-hyung is picking him up today. They’re going to have to brother bonding time. Which means… You have nowhere to be.” Namjoon stands in Jinki’s way. 

“Actually I do,” Jinki says, spinning out of the way of Namjoon. “Taemin gets off his shift and I told him we’d grab dinner.”

“This conversation isn’t over hyung. I will haunt your ass until you talk to  _ someone _ . I don’t care who, and I know it’s not gonna be Taehyung or Taemin. Just… talk to someone. We’re worried okay?” Jonghyun says. 

“Don’t worry.” Jinki smiles. “We’ll talk later, okay?”

As Jinki leaves Namjoon picks up his knitting again. “Well, that wasn’t so bad.”

“Could have been better.”

“Eh. At least he didn’t start throwing things like Kibum-hyung did.”

 

Taemin knows that he looks a little worse for the wear. Actually, he probably looks exactly like he feels. And he feels like he hasn’t slept in three days. Because he hasn’t. Still, when Jinki pulls up in his truck Taemin can’t help but smile widely. 

“Dinner?” Jinki asks.

“Yes please,” Taemin says.

They find a little street cart to go to and get food so they can walk around the snow covered city. Taemin tries to conceal his yawn as they walk. He’s half asleep as Jinki pulls him into a shop. He leans his head against Jinki’s shoulder as Jinki looks over the counter.

“And how can we help you today?” a pleasant sounding female voice says.

“We’re looking for engagement rings,” Jinki says, and that gets Taemin’s attention. 

Taemin looks down at the jewelry case.

“What kind of rings are you looking for?” she asks.

“Just simple ones are fine,” Taemin says.

Jinki smiles widely.

“Okay! Let me get you a few options,” she says. 

 

Taehyung has been working on repairing his relationship with Seokjin. It’s been slow going but the two are becoming closer, like they used to. It helps that Seokjin is putting in the effort, but Taehyung is trying not to be bitter so he won’t bring  _ that _ up. It’s movie night. Taehyung gets to pick the movie and he picks something he remembers both of them liking as children. 

Seokjin gets the popcorn and they settle in, sitting a bit further apart than they would have before. Overall, it’s… nice. Taehyung has missed simply hanging out with his brother and the quiet, stress free companionship is soothing. There’s something endlessly soothing about being with his older brother. It reminds him of when things were better and his dad didn’t hit him. That soothing feeling and his recent sleepless nights means that Taehyung doesn’t even make it halfway through the movie before he’s asleep, curled up like a cat on the couch. Seokjin smiles at the sight. Taehyung looks so much younger when he sleeps.

He carefully tucks a blanket around Taehyung before pausing the movie and turning off the TV. 

 

Taehyung jerks awake only a few hours later, breathing heavy and sweat matting his hair. He puts his head between his knees, trying to calm down but after a moment he gives up on that and staggers down the hall into Namjoon and Seokjin’s bedroom. They’re both sound asleep, but Taehyung ignores that and worms his way into the small space between them. Namjoon groans and Seokjin slurs, “Namjoon?”

Taehyung makes a soft whine and presses as close as he can to Seokjin. Seokjin rolls over and frowns, “Taehyungie? What’re you doing?”

He shakes his head, hiding in Seokjin’s chest and suddenly, Seokjin is nine and Taehyung is six, crawling into his bed after a nightmare. 

Seokjin coos slightly, wrapping his arms firmly around the younger, cuddling him close. 

“I’ve got you Taetae. Don’t worry. It’s fine.”

Namjoon sits up blinking blearily at the pair. He goes to ask what’s going on and Seokjin shakes his head. He shrugs and curls up around Taehyung, smushing him into the middle. 

Taehyung chokes out a surprised laugh, “Namjoon?”

“Your fault kid. You chose the middle. Now reap the consequences.” He squeezes tighter and Taehyung squeaks. 

They settle down quickly, the late hour dragging down eyelids and Jin mumbles something about work tomorrow before he falls back asleep. It’s a rustle of fabric and the comfort of two people on either side of him that allow Taehyung to fall back to sleep.

 

When Minho knocks on Taehyung’s door all he’s hoping for is to talk to the younger and apologize. When Jinki unlocks the door he smiles thinly, directing Minho towards Taehyung’s room. He knocks once and steps inside after a faint call of “Come in.” 

Taehyung is curled up on his bed, blankly staring at the wall. Minho sits down next to him and runs his fingers through Taehyung’s slightly greasy hair. Taehyung hums, shifting to roll closer. 

“What’s up?” He mumbles. 

Minho shrugs, “Just wanted to see you.”

Taehyung chuckles and wiggles closer, “I’m sorry I haven’t…”

“It’s fine. How you holding up?”

Taehyung shrugs, “I’m… fine. Just tired.” 

Minho doesn’t really know what to say, so he just hums. 

“I’m sorry, for not telling you.” Taehyung says, fiddling with the sleeves of his sweater. 

“It’s okay. I don’t really understand why you kept things so quiet but I’m trying.”

Taehyung sighs, “I don’t know how to explain it. I was terrified-”

“It’s okay. You don’t need to explain it again. I’m working on understanding and I shouldn’t push you.”

Taehyung’s brows quirk but he nods, “Still, I’m sorry for how I acted. I know it’s an excuse, but I was really stressed and I took it out on you.”

“Baby,” Minho looks offended, “I  _ know _ and I don’t blame you in the slightest. I wish you had told me sooner of course, but knowing what you’re going through I get how stressed you must have been.”

“Still. I’m sorry.” He wiggles until his head is firmly planted in Minho’s lap. 

Minho leans down and kisses his forehead. “It’s okay. I’m sorry too.” 

“Thank you,” Taehyung whispers and Minho hums. 

The sheets rustle as Minho lays down next to Taehyung, pulling him closer until he’s spooning the younger. The younger sighs and melts into Minho’s chest. The peace doesn’t last long before Taehyung is trembling. He isn’t crying, but his breathing is ragged and he pushes Minho’s arms away. 

“Sorry, sorry.” He rasps, “I can’t - fuck. Don’t touch me. I’m sorry.” 

Minho immediately sits down on the floor, trying to look as unthreatening as possible. “Taehyung, it’s okay. Take a deep breath. Can you tell me what’s going on?”

“I just. I dunno. It was fine. I was fine, but then I remember that I have to face my dad in court. And and it’s too much and I can’t breathe and my chest hurts.” Taehyung tangles his fingers in his hair, wrenching at it desperately. 

“It’s okay. It’ll be okay. Your dad isn’t gonna hurt you anymore and the court will be fine.” 

“I never wanted this.”

“I know. I’m sorry.”

Slowly, Taehyung slinks into Minho’s lap, chest still heaving and cheeks still dry. He doesn’t say a word but he clings to Minho tightly. He wilts as the energy leaves as suddenly as it came and closes his eyes. Minho hums softly, comforting, and Taehyung tries to believe that everything will be fine. 

 

As they all settle into the chairs at the diner, Taehyung is subdued. The court ruling had been straightforward, but Taehyung still had to be put on the witness stand. If he’s being honest, he doesn’t remember much. It’s all a blur after the prosecutor submitted the hard photographic evidence of the bruises littering Taehyung’s skin. What he can remember is feeling like all he amounted to was evidence. He wasn’t a person, not really. He was those images of bruises and wide glassy eyes, staring blankly at his hands. 

Jeongguk sprawls out next to Taehyung throwing his arm around the elder’s shoulders. Taehyung flinches away from the contact and Jeongguk immediately pulls away, muttering an apology. Taking a deep, shaky breath Taehyung waves it away. He tries to focus on the menu in front of him but he sets it down after it’s clear that he’s not going to be able to pick anything out. The vague sounds of people talking and dishes clattering buzz in the background and Taehyung looks around the table for something to entertain himself with.

Taemin’s head is tipped back and Taehyung can  _ swear _ he can hear him snoring even from across the table. Taehyung vaguely registers Jinki ordering for both him and Taemin. He’s actually jealous of Taemin right now. Sleep sounds so nice. 

Minho gently runs his fingers up and down his back in an attempt to soothe Taehyung. Kibum finally clicks his tongue and motions at Jeongguk. 

“Move.” 

“But I wanna sit next to Taehyung,” He pouts, blinking those damn innocent looking eyes at Key and for a second his resolve wavers. 

“You can sit there once I’ve taken care of Taehyung okay?” Kibum bargains.

Jeongguk considers and then nods, switching seats with Key and pestering Jonghyun about the ‘super secret album’ he was working on with Yoongi. 

Kibum takes Taehyung’s hands in his, turning him so they’re face to face. It hurts to see how glazed over Taehyung’s eyes are. He starts talking to him in a soft tone, making sure to squeeze his hands occasionally.

It seems like it takes years before Taehyung blinks at him and frowns, “Hyung?” his voice is scratchy. 

“Hey. You were just a bit lost in thought. You’re okay.” Kibum says, passing Taehyung a glass of water. 

He drinks it wordlessly, and Kibum switches seats with Jeongguk again just as the food gets to their table. 

Kibum keeps a close eye on Taehyung throughout dinner. He looks better and is talking with Jeongguk and Jimin, laughing, but he knows the healing process is just starting.  

  
  


“What do you  _ mean _ you don’t know what you’re getting everyone?”  Jonghyun says. 

Taemin shrugs, shoving his hands in his pockets. “I mean, I was just gonna get everyone gift cards?”

“WHAT? That’s not a gift!” Jonghyun waves his arms.

“What do you mean gift cards aren’t a gift?” Minho says. “It’s got gift in the name.”

Jonghyun opens his mouth, shuts it, and takes a couple of deep breaths. “Are you kidding me?”

“Of  _ course _ I’m kidding,” Taemin waves a hand. “Who wouldn’t be kidding?”

“Wait. That means that I have to compete with Jimin.” Minho says. 

“You’ve already lost, man,” Taemin says. “He’s amazing with gifts.”

“Somebody told me he was getting Taehyung Gucci,” Jonghyun says. 

“Gucci? I can’t compete with Gucci.” Minho says.

“No, you really can’t.” Key says and then flips a page in his magazine.

“Taemin what are you getting him?” Minho demands. 

Taemin takes a long drag of his coffee. “I’m not telling.”

Minho looks like he’s ready to implode.

“You’d better think of something, time's a wasting,” Key says.

  
  


Jonghyun and Taehyung camp themselves out by the christmas tree, intent on passing out the gifts to everyone. The first gift Taehyung picks up is one of Yoongi’s. Yoongi is half asleep on the couch and Taehyung pouts. The gift in his hands is reasonably soft and so it’s without much guilt that Taehyung chucks the gift into Yoongi’s chest. Yoongi startles awake and looks around himself.

Taehyung pouts, “Hyung. It’s gift opening time.”

“It’s ass in the morning.” 

“Same thing.” Taehyung beams. 

Jinki passes him coffee as he comes in from the kitchen. He yawns as he takes his seat next to Taemin and leans his head sleepily against Taemin’s shoulder. Between Jonghyun and Taehyung the gifts are passed out quickly. Everyone tears into their gifts.

It’s quiet until people start waking up and then it’s  _ loud _ . Everyone is shouting to be heard over each other and the noise is nearly deafening. Key’s presents get the loudest reactions, having bought everyone something Gucci.

“It matches your personality,” Key says as explanation.

Taehyung bounces in his seat as Jimin opens his gift. The wrapping paper falls away to reveal a Gucci box and Jimin freezes. 

“You didn’t.” He breathes. 

Taehyung beams, “I did.” 

Jimin opens the box slowly and carefully pulls out the sweater tucked inside. He makes a scream in a pitch none of them can hear and tackles Taehyung into a hug. 

Taemin pulls at the ribbon on the small present from Jinki, laughing at how excited Jimin is over the sweater he had just received. The wrapping comes off easily enough and Taemin opens the small box to reveal the simple wedding band he remembered looking at earlier in the month. He looks wide eyed over at Jinki who smiles at him and slips the band onto his finger. 

“Do you like it?” Jinki asks over Hoseok’s screaming.

“I love it, and you,” Taemin says.

Taemin cups Jinki’s face in his hands and drags him in for a kiss. 

“Hey, break it up or get a room,” Key drawls, throwing another present addressed to Jinki at them.

“Sorry, sorry,” Taemin says, laughing as Jinki kisses his way down his neck before sitting back to open his present. 

Taemin cuddles into his side and rests his hand on Jinki’s thigh, tracing patterns with his thumb. 

“Wait what the fuck is that?” Jonghyun says. “The fuck are those?”

He’s zeroed in on Taemin and Jinki.

“Uh, a coffee mug?” Jinki tries.

“Are those rings? Are you engaged? What the fuck?” Jonghyun says, voice only getting louder.

“You’re engaged?!” Hoseok screams.

“Congratulations!” Namjoon says.

“I’m planning the wedding,” Key says with a tone of finality.

“Why didn’t you tell us?” Minho says.

“Gee I dunno. Maybe we were busy,” Taemin shrugs. 

Taehyung’s brows are furrowed, “I thought everyone knew already? It was obvious.” 

“Well not to me,” Jeongguk says.

“Me either.” Minho says.

Taehyung rolls his eyes, “Well, Minho. We’ve kinda established you’re oblivious.” 

Minho pouts, “I am not.” 

Key levels an unamused stare at him. “If we could all recall that you were indeed dense enough that Taehyung thought you hated him before you started dating.”

“Hyung,” Minho whines. 

Taehyung laughs and steals a kiss from Minho. “Just let it go.” 

“ _ I _ will never let it go,” Jimin teases. 

“For the record neither will I,” Taemin says.

“The dance crew won’t either,” Jinki says.

“Neither will the models.” Key says.

“Or anyone who listened to my radio show,” Yoongi says quietly.

“Or any of the three hundred students that I had in lecture that day,” Jonghyun says.

Minho makes a wailing noise. “You told everyone?”

“Duh,” Jeongguk says. 

Everyone laughs and pokes fun at Minho and for the first time Taehyung feels like they’re all going to be okay.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> the evil has been defeated. sorry it took so long.

**Author's Note:**

> well if you got through that here's a gold star. figuratively speaking of course. this is probably gonna be the longest chapter because there was so much we needed to set up, but no guarantees bc we have no self control 6v6
> 
> hope you enjoyed reading it, there's more to come so keep an eye out for it. 
> 
> -B and K


End file.
